


To Conquer

by goldshard (orphan_account)



Category: The Avengers (2012), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Abortion, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Arranged Marriage, Character Death, Consent Issues, Dubious Consent, Eye Trauma, Infidelity, Intersexuality, Jotun!Loki, Miscarriage, Non-Explicit Sex, Other, Rape/Non-con References, Work In Progress, avenger!loki, bratty loki, drugged consent, spoiled loki
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-25
Updated: 2014-09-08
Packaged: 2017-11-22 08:19:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 47
Words: 73,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/607763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/goldshard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When little Loki, son of Laufey king and his mighty consort Fárbauti was born a runt, they knew he had no home in Jötunheimr.</p><p>In an effort to give their favorite a home, the kings only lost the heart of the realm.</p><p>Thus, little Loki took it upon himself to take it back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Into the Ice

**Author's Note:**

> IMPORTANT: Please heed the tags above. This story may be potentially triggering for some, and will feature miscarriage, character death, rape (from the aggressor's POV) and abortion. Thank you.
> 
> This story was originally titled "Anthem Tears".

"Perhaps, Lord Fárbauti, you would mean to please me?" Laufey said, pacing the room quietly, heavy crimson eyes watching Fárbauti.

"I know not of what I mean to do with you, Laufey King, only that I was summoned to your presence." Fárbauti says, trying to keep his voice steady and plain. Fárbauti was strong, but even the strongest tremor before Laufey.

"I mean many wicked things for you..." Laufey said, pulling Fárbauti to his feet.

In conclusion, that could be the simplest explanation of the origin of Laufey King's lover.

* * *

Helblindi was the first child, born into a glorious golden age of Jötunheimr. Beautiful ice palaces and temples lined Helblindi's city. The people were cheery and content. When season came in, the fishermen were prosperous.

Helblindi grew up with a touching coolness in his heart of the Casket of Ancient Winters. He grew and under the approval of his sire, Fárbauti, and his dam, the King. His parents were the fiercest of the fierce, and Helblindi and his brothers yet to come would be fiercer.

Laufey's second pregnancy was miserable. He could hold no food, and he had rapid, random, deteriorating mood swings. When the councilmen did not follow his irrational orders, men were found dead on the floor.

Laufey bore a second youngling. The child was named Loki, and early in his life, Loki presented the most curious qualities. While bright and clever like Helblindi, the child had no spots for his horns to grow, which puzzled Laufey and Fárbauti. It was only seven weeks after his birth, that Loki's parents realized the boy was growing hair.

A runt.

The news that Laufey King had bore a runt spread life wildfire through Jötunheimr. It said nothing of the child, but only of the child's dam and sire, this weakness. It was shameful for Laufey to have bore such a weak, useless son. Many thanked the Norns that Laufey King had bore Helblindi first, for what an unnatural mess a runty king would be.

* * *

Not long after this relevation, Loki was brought to the temple. He was laid on the ground before an idol of a great king of Jötunheimr past, where he would wait, for all the great chieftains and warriors to come.

Loki was given little food nor drink in his wait, as to purify his body. Only enough to sustain him.

The great men of Jötunheimr arrived, bearing gifts. They were placed in the rooms of the Ice Palace that would soon become Loki's.

They were led into the temple, where the infant child was set upon a pedestal, his curious eyes looking around the new menagerie for him to watch. But he was so hungry! It was cold here... Colder than he liked.

The child's eyes brightened, recognizing its dam as Laufey King came into the temple, walking straight up to his son. Fárbauti followed, holding Heblindi's hand. Laufey filed up to the pedestal, picking up Loki. The child gave a coo of approval, latching his tiny hands onto his dam.

Laufey lifted the boy into the air, and Loki looked down in wonder. Yes, he was very high up...

"Please," said Laufey, "we beg the Norns, we pray, please give Loki a path. Give him strength."

"Please." The crowd ducked their heads to pray, focusing all their attentions on the princeling runt. Fárbauti glanced at his other son, and Helblindi was praying hard, his hands clasped together in his lap and his eyes screwed shut..

* * *

Laufey King fell pregnant again, not long after, to the chagrin of many. This pregnancy was smoother, and a healthy child was born, by the name of Býleistr. Many had given complaint that, perhaps it should've been Laufey to sire the final child, as Laufey's womb had failed them before, had it not? But they were soon quelled and silenced in the first week of Býleistr's life, who was born large for Jötunn get and had a strength matching Helblindi's on his first days.

* * *

All three children were born thoughtful and clever. Laufey and Fárbauti imported more and more texts from Álfheimr, Vanaheimr, and even Asgard, for the children quickly read through all the texts Jötunheimr had to offer (twice). Without instruction nor encouragement, the children compared and debated their knowledge.

Fárbauti instructed his children in learning the ice magic that flowed under every Jötunn's skin. Helblindi and Býleistr were adept at the skill, forming much ice quickly, but it had little shape apart from 'sharp'. But Loki was truly the one to excel--within his first days harnessing the talent, Loki could shape fine, ornate daggers, swords, spears and shields. Such ability was usually only displayed by warriors who had well practiced the talent for centuries, and Loki did the feat in mere weeks.

Fárbauti dug deep into the texts, and found a tall stack of books on magic for Loki. He helped Loki to follow the instructions he could not understand well, and the child excelled further. Fárbauti and Laufey watched in astonishment as Loki harnessed the seiðr they had no access to, he moved objects and created empty shadows of himself for their entertainment.

On one quiet evening, Loki asked his family to sit in the throne room so he could demonstrate a new achievement for which Loki was very proud. Laufey sat on his throne in the hall, with Fárbauti and the other sons sitting at his feet, when the mite of a child entered the room.

"What have you to show us, Loki?" asked Laufey, and Loki grinned.

"It is very special." Loki said proudly. His dam and his sire looked on him expectantly, and his brothers seemed very excited, as Loki took a deep breath and created a double. Laufey leaned closer in interest.

Loki spoke silently to the shadow for a moment, his lips moving, but making no sound. The double nodded.

This in itself was momentous--Loki had never created a double that had the ability to move itself anymore than breathing.

Loki linked arms with the clone, and the clone bent his knees and threw Loki in the air, and with the momentum Loki flipped and landed softly on his feet, continuing the acrobatic dance that his brothers had learned the week before, and Loki had only watched, as their was no partner suitable or safe in size for him to learn with. Loki had been brokenhearted, for wouldn't he need this dance to acquire a mate?

Evidently, Loki had managed to learn the dance.

When he finished, his family burst to applause. Loki ran up to them, the shadow dissolving into the air as Laufey rose from his throne, and Loki's dam wrapped his arms around him, Loki giggling.

"Now, when I'm big and tall, I'll be able to dance with everyone too!" Loki said, extremely pleased with himself, and as Loki's brothers congratulated his fantastic magic, Laufey and Fárbauti exchanged knowing glances. So Loki still didn't understand he would never grow to proper size, then?

"So can you make your shadows do anything now, Loki?" Fárbauti asked his child.

"Yes, sire." Loki said, "I can only make one now be solid and move, but I can still maintain other images as I concentrate on the one. Maybe someday I can make more than one a real personality!"

"I am so very proud of you, Loki." said Fárbauti, and Loki let his sire ruffle his hair.

It was such a happy memory, but so tragic too, because the only partner Loki could ever have was himself.

* * *

 Loki was a lovely child. Unconventional, weak, yes, but lovely. And beautiful. His face was finely shaped, and his long, black hair only accentuated this. Those who complained of his runtiness before did compliment him on his beauty, with silken black hair crowned in braids, and thick eyelashes framing pretty red eyes.

His brothers were handsome too, in the traditional way. The three children arranged in age order were indeed a pretty picture, and a portrait of the family was commissioned.

Laufey hung the portrait, and stared at in contemplation. Fárbauti sat next to his mate, in a lesser chair, watching his face.

"What are you thinking of, Laufey?" Fárbauti finally asked. Laufey King blinked, as if being drawn back to life.

"Loki." Laufey said sadly. "He will never feel a part of society in Jötunheimr. I want to give him a home where he could feel competent. I have thought of marrying him off, but to no avail."

"Oh?"

"Álfheimr does not accept outsiders. In the culture of Asgard, he would be an unacceptable anomaly. No Vanir of suitable stance would take a spouse that was neither male nor female."

"I do see the predicament." Fárbauti said, "what do you mean to do, then?"

"Perhaps..." Laufey trailed off, "perhaps I would give him a realm."

"But which? Conquering is no simple matter."

"Midgard. They are unorganized, and primitive. They have no contact with the other realms. Loki would make a fit king of Midgard, and he could be of much benefit to the realm." Laufey said.

"I would agree... But Laufey King, Midgard, it is under protectorate of the Allfather. He would surely wage war against us if we should try to conquer Midgard... Do we risk that? Warring with Asgard is much different from Midgard."

"We do it for Loki." Laufey said.

"Undoutedly."


	2. Idunn's Orchard

Perhaps one of Loki's many useful traits was that when his sire asked him to do something, Loki did not question him.

A particular few of the elder giants could summon ice so sharp that they could tear through the very fabric of the universe. It was crude, compared to the Bifröst of the Æsir, but it suited the purposes of travel well. Fárbauti was one of the few.

Fárbauti took Loki to the top of a very tall spire of the Ice Palace, supporting his child up the climb to the lookout nook at the top.

"Wow!" Loki gasped, looking out on the Ice City, his mouth agape. Then Fárbauti realized it must have been the first time Loki had see the Ice City from so far in the air--his smooth runtling skin did not allow him to climb well as the rough, jagged skin of the norm. "Our realm is very beautiful, sire." Loki said, the wind feeling chilly, even for a young Jötunn.

"You, Loki, could find beauty in anything." Fárbauti said fondly to his son, but in this instance, Loki was right. The Ice City was a sparkling, sharp civilization. "Loki, I would wish to show you something." Fárbauti said.

"What?" Loki asked.

"Come here," Fárbauti said, and Loki climbed back to his sire, sitting on his knee. "watch." Said Fárbauti.

Fárbauti summoned a blade to his hands with an edge thinner than one of Loki's hairs. Loki looked at the thing in horror, shrinking back from the blade, closer to his sire instinctively.

Fárbauti sliced the knife through the air, and a soft but bloodcurdling squeal rang, and Loki shuddered at the noise, but then noticed the shimmering line the blade at left in the air. He reached forward for it, his fingers catching at the rip. Loki added another hand to the rip, pulling it apart. He saw only darkness, and in fright, he snapped his hands back and the hole swallowed itself and blinked away.

Fárbauti smiled, wrapping one big hand around Loki's two small ones. "If you were to step into the gap, son," he said, "you would see the darkness. But if you used the knife on the darkness, you would open new holes, to the realms of Yggdrasil. Would you try for me?"

"Yes." Loki said, scared but almost excited. He tore himself away from Fárbauti, and took a deep breath. He summoned a dagger to his hands, at felt certain the edge was sharp enough. He slashed it through the air, and the knife caught. Loki tried to loop the thumb of his other hand into the tear, but it seal itself over to quick.

Loki tried thrice more. He dissolved away the first three knives, but after his fourth failure he cried out in frustration, and pitched the knife off the edge. Fárbauti watched it fall quietly, to land embedded in the Ice Palace roof.

"You think too hard of the edge." Fárbauti told his son. "What you summon is only a blade, for you think of only the edge. It is crude like the magic of your brothers, yes?"

"Yes, sire." Loki said quietly, red eyes trained to the ice bricks of the ledge.

"Focus on the quality of the entire dagger, it's luxury, it's fineness." Fárbauti told Loki.

Loki did just that. He closed his eyes, and soon felt the weight of the knife in his palm. The hilt was straight transparent, but the blade itself was purest of white.

He swiped again in the sky, creating a solid rip in the air. He pulled it apart a bit with one hand, and his sires hands pushed in as well, tearing the gape wide. Loki took a deep of air, and pulled himself inside the darkness. Fárbauti followed, and Loki clung to Fárbauti's leg, which he could only feel, for he was blind to all.

"You have the knife still." Fárbauti said, and sure enough, Loki did. "Tear until you find a place you like."

Loki tore through the dark, and opened to a world with a dark red sky. He could already feel the heat seeping in... No, not that realm.

"No, I suppose Muspelheimr would not be to your liking." Fárbauti said with a light tilt to his voice. Loki tried a different spot, and ripped again. While the air coming in was not freezing, it was pleasantly cool, so Loki stepped through, and Fárbauti followed.

The sky here was blue, rather like home. There was snow here, but a thin, soft cover, and when he kicked through he found hardpacked soil beneath, instead. "Midgard." Fárbauti said approvingly. "Do you like it?"

"Yes sire, I do!" Loki said, drinking in as much of the landscape as he possibly could.

"Then maybe it shall someday be yours." Fárbauti said. "Come, I shall bring us home." Fárbauti summoned a blade, and ripped straight home to Jötunheimr.

As soon as they were upon the spire once more, Fárbauti told his son, "with practice, you can very well of control your destination. Now, I will assist you back down."

* * *

If there was one in the world Loki wished to impress the most, it was Helblindi. His elder brother was fierce and strong, and Loki wished desperately to be like him. But it appeared as if there were other plans.

Helblindi was a good brother. He played games with Loki (the ones that were safe), and let Loki show him amazing displays of his seiðr. But Loki could tell Helblindi wasn't truly impressed, and was only humoring him.

"Helblindi! Helblindi! Brother!" Loki called, racing after his brother down the corridor. Helblindi was quick moving for a Jötunn, and Loki himself was quick, but short legs hindered him.

"What?!" Helblindi finally yelled, turning to face Loki, looking something ferocious. "Oh. It's just you. I thought Býleistr was trailing me again. He hasn't left me alone all day."

"Come up to the balcony with me, brother." Loki said, "our sire showed me something amazing!"

"Alright, Loki, have at it." Helblindi said, letting Loki lead him back up the stairs, up to Loki's chambers. As they passed through, Helblindi asked, "what are you showing me?"

"Sire showed me how to travel between the realms!" Loki said excitedly.

" _Show me._ " Helblindi ordered in his "future king of Jötunheimr" voice, full of wanderlust. Loki nodded. He materialized a new knife as he had before, ripping at the seams of the air. Helblindi cringed at the squelching noise, but let Loki pull him into the darkness.

Loki made a tear in the void, not checking the location before Helblindi pushed Loki through the rip.

The two Frost Giants tripped and fell on hard, warm ground. Helblindi groaned, looking up at the sky hesitantly. They were in an apple orchard, he saw. Then, he noticed what seemed to be an Æsir woman screaming maniacally. "Guards! Guards!" she shrieked.

One armored Æsir appeared. "Idunn?" he called, trotting and recoiling in horror when he saw the two Jötnar staggering to their feet. He was just unsheathing his sword when Helblindi sent three small icicles flying at him. The first two buried themselves in his eyes, the third barely grazing him.

More guards arrived, and neither Loki or Helblindi had the ability to hold them off very long. The two were captured and their hands restrained, but the guards realized that both of them were younglings, the reason neither were slaughtered on the spot.

"What should we do with them, Idunn?" One man asked.

"Take them to Odin Allfather, Anders." Idunn said, refusing to look anymore at the hideous Jötnar that had stumbled into her forest and knocked over one of her trees. "For your assistance. Split it." she said, tossing a silver apple at one of the guards, before tossing another one that bounced off Loki's head painfully, and was quickly snatched by another guard.

Loki and his brother were dragged through the city of Asgard, creating quite the spectacle. When they arrived in the palace, burlap sacks were thrown upon their heads, so they would not know the route to the Allfather's rooms.

"Allfather!" a man shouted at the door, and the door opened, likely by a servant.

The burlap was torn off their heads, and Loki blinked, looking up to the Allfather, who looked down upon Loki and his brother sternly. "How old are you?" the Allfather asked after a moment.

"I'm three decades, Allfather, my brother's four." Loki said.

"Young, then. Tell me, whose sons are you?"

"We are Laufeyson, and Fárbautison." said Helblindi, who eyed the Allfather suspiciously.

"You've wandered rather far from the Ice Palace, haven't you?" The Allfather looked at one of his servants. "Summon Laufey King and Fárbauti to retrieve their sons."

* * *

"You didn't forbid him from using the skill?!" Laufey said incredulously.

"I did not see the harm," Fárbauti said, "I would not imagine him to travel to Asgard of all places."

Laufey softened. "Of course."

"But of Helblindi? He blinded an Æsir." Fárbauti said.

"We've payed the weregild, the transgression is thus forgotten." said Laufey.

"I was merely commenting on the strength. The battle readiness. He will be a great warrior." Fárbauti said.

"And a great king."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The name "Helblindi" translates to "All Blinder". This is believed to mean Helblindi blinded his foes, or was, perhaps, blind himself.


	3. Children Get Older

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the fucked formatting. The editor insists that nothing's wrong and I can't fix it.

"Loki, for leaving the realm without permission, your sire and I have decided that you are not to leave the royal chambers for a month. Your elder brother is punished the same." Laufey said.

Loki's face crumpled in sadness. This was so unfair! "Sire never told me I wasn't allowed to use what he showed me!"

"No, he didn't. If he had, the punishment would've been much more severe." Laufey stroked his sons hair, his hand seeming over large on the child's tiny head.

"It's not fair!" Loki shrieked, pulling his head away from his dam and slamming it against the mattress. Laufey cringed at the slap that was created by the impact. "You don't love me!" Loki screamed.

Laufey ignored his sons fighting and calls of, "I'm too old for this!" as he lifts him back into his arms to cradle him. "Oh Loki," Laufey sighs, "can't you see that I'm doing this because I love you? If those Æsir dogs hadn't shown you mercy... What would I have done?"

Loki let out another cry, squirming again before he stilled. Laufey continued, "you are lucky you remind Odin much of his own son, because of your small size..."

Laufey was cut off. "Don't call me 'small'!" Loki lashed out again, "call me what I am! Don't lie to me! I can tell! I'm a runt! Say it!"

"No."

"Say it!" Loki screamed, his voice raw.

"No. I will not give you allowance to lie and belittle yourself for shortcomings. For one so adept at spotting lies and telling them, your most fooling lies are the ones you tell yourself..." Loki was crying again. Silent, though. "Oh, Loki. Sweet child." Laufey cradled his second son closer, his fingers splayed against the cool blue cheek of his child. For the first time since Loki could remember, Laufey started to hum.

After maybe three verses, Loki's eyes shuttered shut, his lips spread just a little bit open, his breath slower and lazier. Asleep.

Laufey carefully got off the bed, moving the curtain aside from the door to let Fárbauti in from where he'd spent time outside the room worrying. "You did well..." Fárbauti said, kneeling next to Loki's bed, a bed crafted for someone far larger than him. Fárbauti brushed a hand along Loki's forehead, and the child muttered something in his sleep. "He truly is beautiful."

"He is." Laufey said, touching Fárbauti's shoulder. "I wish I had more time for him, and the others."

"You are a better dam than you give yourself credit for." Fárbauti said sincerely, leaning into Laufey's touch a moment, before stretching back onto his feet. "Let us put him to bed. Proper."

Laufey cradled the still slumbering Loki in his arms while Fárbauti pulled Loki's sheets back so they could set him down bare on the bottom sheet. Laufey pulled Loki's hair back with his fingers as the Fárbauti put pillows beneath his head, and Loki just mumbled as Laufey pulled his long, inky hair into the tie. In silent agreement, the two left the room, closing the curtain behind them.

* * *

Býleistr was lonely. With both his older brothers bound to the chambers, he had no one to play with.

No one had told him why they were in trouble—his dam and his sire told him he need not worry of it.

Býleistr went to ask Helblindi, who he thought might offer some information. Helblindi threw daggers of ice at his face, which Býleistr easily deflected with his hands. "Brother, why are you and Loki being punished?"

"They caught us rutting." Helblindi lies gruffly, lying on his bed.

"You liar," Býleistr accuses, "that's disgusting." Helblindi just smirks. "Ugh, ugh, even if it were true, you would have crushed him!"

Helblindi laughs, and says only, "runty as he is."

"Please, tell me why you too are being punished?" Býleistr asks again.

"I told you," Helblindi lies again, "they caught us rutting."

Býleistr didn't bother asking Loki, who threw a dagger, a real metal one, the moment Býleistr moved aside the curtain. The dagger buried itself in the wall. A warning, because Loki never missed. Býleistr turned around and went back the way he came.

So Býleistr was alone for his afternoon walk. His fingers clenched around chains and jewels hanging off his neck as he angrily kicked around the snow in front of him. It wasn't fair! Loki and Helblindi's punishment might as well as been his too, and he didn't even know what happened.

Býleistr walked up to the stadium, the only one in the seats as a score of warriors trained in the field below. It was always warriors, constantly, lately! Was Jötunheimr going to war again? Of course, no one would tell Býleistr, the third prince...

He leaned his forehead against the bitingly cold metal rail, relishing the bitterness of it. He watched the warriors train, many so very clumsy with their ice magicks. Býleistr didn't know it was even possible to be that bad!

Býleistr was never one with his senses, and was never the most aware of himself, which was why he nearly jumped a mile when Fárbauti put a comforting hand on his son's back. "Hello." Fárbauti said.

"Nobody needs me." Býleistr just said. "I should run away."

"I believe it says something about your dam and I," said Fárbauti, "that twice in a week our sons feel unloved." Býleistr looked away. Fárbauti began again, "you were not born to be a king."

Býleistr muttered something.

"What was that?" asked Fárbauti.

"You don't need to remind me!" The youngest prince spat bitterly.

"As I was saying, you were born to be something better." Fárbauti said. The boy was trying to look as if this hadn't caught his attention, but Fárbauti knew his youngest better than that. "You'll be Helblindi's crutch. He will come to you in times of need, rely on you for loyalty and advice. You will be important, but you need not feel the weight of Jötunheimr on your shoulders."

"Isn't Loki better for advice?" asked Býleistr, "what of Loki?"

"Loki has a strange but glorious future for him...it need only be secured."

* * *

Perhaps several months later, Loki was summoned to his parents chambers. This was quite the occasion, as normally when his dam or his sire wanted his company they sought him out themselves, instead of summoning him. He'd only been in his parents chambers once before, when he was still very young, perhaps seven years, and Býleistr had just been born.

He ducked his head around the curtain, calling out a quiet, "hello?"

"Come in, Loki." His dam said, and Loki scrambled inside. "Come sit by the window with your sire and I."

"Yes?" Loki asked, sitting down in front of the window between his parents. The window had a view of the Ice City's gates, and Loki felt like he could see the entire city looking out of it.

"We felt the need to inform you Loki... We are going to war." Fárbauti said.

"Helblindi shall be excited." Loki said.

"We do it for you." Laufey said. "We are giving you Midgard."

"What use have I for Midgard?" Loki asked sourly.

"It is a home... Where you shall fit in better."

"I fit in fine in Jötunheimr!" Loki cried.

"Oh Loki, you are still to young too understand. When you are older, you will not fit in." said Fárbauti.

"Then maybe I won't want to. I'll be Loki the strange. Please, please let me stay in Jötunheimr!"

"We only do what we believe is best for you." Laufey draped an arm around Loki.

"No!" Loki yelled, squirming away and running out angrily.

* * *

 On his forty-fifth birthday, Helblindi was to receive his first carvings. The Jötnar were born with lines etched in their skin—lines of kinship. But the carvings they gave themselves were of the highest honor. Signs of the men they were, of their honor.

The crown prince was being recognized for his skill of aim, and for whispers of his competence spreading across the realm. Helblindi always went for the eyes, and was receiving an honor for this.

Loki was to witness the carving, and he was frightened. He couldn't understand why Helblindi wasn't scared... He was having chunks of his skin cut off. On purpose!

"I'm ready for this Loki. You're too young to understand. You'll be ready for the, someday too, Loki." Helblindi had told him.

"If I'll be allowed. Wouldn't want to take more flesh off when I've already got so little." Loki said bitterly.

"Strange Loki." said Helblindi.

Nonetheless, Helblindi seemed at peace with the choice.

Loki watched them scrape of Helblindi's flesh, watched blood spill on the ice as they carved an eye upon his arm.

"You are grown now, Helblindi." said Laufey. "A warrior."


	4. Incomplete

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to note that the warnings for this fic have changed since I've planned it out further now.
> 
> Thanks.

"I thought I was grown now!" Helblindi yelled. It was the first time Loki had ever seen his brother stand neck to neck with his dam, bickering angrily. But Loki knew it definitely wasn't going to be the last.

"That doesn't mean I'm letting you go recklessly into the first battle of a war!" Laufey yelled back. "Do you have no self-preservation?"

"I want to, and I will fight for for my people!" Helblindi screamed. The last of the servants in the room scurried out, not wanting to end up on the receiving end of either Laufey King or Helblindi prince's rage by accident.

"You are the crown prince! You will fight when it is necessary, when they need your guidance! You are not putting your life in danger for the thrill of it." Laufey said, trying to push his anger down and return his calm.

Helblindi nearly barked with rage. "It's a fight with mortals!" he yelled angrily, barely attempting to control himself, and instead throwing darts of ice toward his dam.

Laufey easily deflected the ice, grabbing Helblindi's hand in his stony grip. "You will go to your chambers... And calm yourself. And you will not unnecessarily endanger yourself."

Loki waits. After an appropriate amount of time, he pushes aside the curtain to Helblindi's quarters without asking. "Leave me." Helblindi says in a voice that is still shuddering with anger and choking.

"What are you doing?" Loki asks, staring at his older brother. He is situated in front of the mirror, his rings for his piercings scattered about the floor. Helblindi holds a sharp carver knife in his hands, and there's a trickle of blood coming from his forehead.

"I said," Helblindi enunciates, "leave me!" Loki ignores him, sweeping the jewel encrusted gold, silver, and platinum into his hands. He stands next to his brother, trying to take the knife from him.

Helblindi swats Loki's little hands away, and holds the knife far out of Loki's reacher. But with Helblindi sitting and Loki standing, they're nearly head to head. "What are you doing?" Loki asks again, ripping a bit of fabric off the loincloth hanging at his hips. He dabbed it at Helblindi's cuts, and Helblindi pulled away, only to fall backwards. Loki climbed on top of his brother, situating his knees at Helblindi's neck. He dabs again at the cuts Helblindi had made, and realized that Helblindi had been cutting at his kin markings.

The markings of the House of Laufey. His brother had been about to renounce his family when Loki walked in. The first cut had been made. But it would have taken many more.

"Helblindi! That's insane!" Loki said. "You wouldn't give up the crown over one battle!"

"What say do you have in it?" Helblindi snarled, trying to push Loki off, but using his seidr to bind them to the floor with powers Helblindi could not budge. Loki focused his healing magics, so the line Helblindi had made would not scar.

* * *

 

"Father?" Thor asked one evening as he dined alone with the Allfather. "I remember..l perhaps three or four years back of an afternoon when the guards came through the halls screaming of Frost Giants. I passed it off at the time, but now I have remember the event. I cannot place why, but the memory unsettles me."

Odin drops the fork with a clink and rubs his head. "Perhaps twelve seasons ago, two Frost Giants appeared in Idunn's orchard. They were very young."

"How? The Jötnar have no Bifröst."

"They have means of travel, from their casket. It is primitive, but affective. Before we built the Bifröst, we traveled through natural rips of the universe. They are what the Bifröst itself creates. Some of the Frost Giants have the ability to craft knives sharp enough to rip these voids themselves." The Allfather said.

Thor still looked thoroughly perturbed. He curled his lips. "Who were these Jötnar that arrived."

"Laufeysons. The elder, Helblindi. And the middle, Loki."

"I know of Helblindi, but not Loki. Why?"

"Loki's arrival was the first I knew of him too, though I knew of the younger, Býleistr. But he was far too small to be a Frost Giant with three and a half decades to his name. Loki is a runt."

"The Frost Giants have runts?"

"Quite rarely. They grow hair instead of horns, and are natural masters of seidr. But they are very weak and small in numbers. Loki may be the only one alive now. He will be lucky to reach the height of one of the Æsir."

"Peculiar."

"Speak not of Loki, Thor. If the Jötnar are secretive of him, then that is that. We need not unnecessarily antagonize them whilst they are peaceful."

How very wrong of the Allfather.

* * *

Loki and Býleistr go to Midgard with their sire, to see. Loki is still petulant over the entire matter, but Fárbauti has hope that when Loki understands better, he will accept the gift his parents give him.

Midgard is a miserable realm, Loki thought. Disconnected from the others, full of weak and simpleminded people who lived no longer than insects, with time and age passing them by.

Old Age stalked the Jötnar, but she happily slaughtered the mortals.

Loki walked through the village the had arrived in. The homes were primitive, built of wood and thatch. The ground was frozen hard, but it was still bumpy and full of nasty pebbles.

He came across two mortals, encased in ice. Their was an elder and a younger, the younger with the eyes covered by his hands. The elder was taller, with longer hair. The hands pulled on the younger's shoulders, the mouth locked in a scream.

"It's not much fit of a realm to rule if you kill them all, sire." Loki finally said mildly. "Show me a live one."

Within the day, Loki was brought a live Midgardian. He was informed that it was a male, young, hardly reaching manhood. Loki was ecstatic to discover that the Midgardian, the human he'd been presented with was shorter than him.

He told everyone else to leave the room, before approaching the Midgardian further. The man trembled, but Loki was impressed that he wasn't crying. Loki finally cupped his face for a moment, expecting the skin to shrivel and blacken, and the man flinched away. But nothing happened. The caress was cold, but it did not hurt the Midgardian.

"Curious." said Loki, "I expect it's something from being a runt. What do you think?"

"Only grateful, only grateful." The Midgardian said quickly.

"Always wanted to try something." Loki said, leaning down and kissing the man. His lips were wet and soft, and his saliva was far to hot.

Loki broke apart after a moment, and the Midgardian really was shaking violently. "That was underwhelming. I'll be sure to inform my younger brother that kissing is wholly overrated."

Loki continued to feel the man, patting his hands on his chest and his back. The Midgardian was hot everywhere, but there was skin that had shattered away from frostbite on his arms and his lower back. The Midgardian screamed when Loki touched these spots, and it made Loki smile.

"Helblindi told me once, that gender comes from being only half of genitals." Loki said, "isn't that curious?"

Loki hooked his fingers around the mans breeches, his cool fingers tracing the outline of hip bones through the thin shirt. "Is this alright?" The man shivered, but he nodded.

Loki pushed the man onto a pile of furs and spread his legs, starring clinically at his cock. Behind it, all there was was his balls and asshole. "Helblindi's right!" Loki said, "you have no cunt."

The man closed his legs and turned over on the furs as Loki said, "you aren't whole."

Loki waited a second before saying, "put your breeches back on." The man reached for the garment, keeping careful eyes on Loki, and Loki finally said, "you humans are strange. You may leave."


	5. It Goes On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is definitely a turning point in the story line, but the end of the chapter is a bit filler-y. (>_

"Allfather!" a messenger called. The guards nodded at his badge and allowed the runner into the throne room. The messenger knelt before the Allfather, who nodded, so he gave Odin the note, bowed again, and departed as quickly as he had come.

Odin unfolded the note.

" _The Frost Giants lay waste to Midgard. The mortals are being slaughtered_."It read it the curt handwriting of Heimdall.

Oh no.

* * *

Loki would always remember how everything fell apart.

His realization that things were going wrong was when Helblindi was called to battle. Helblindi was ecstatic, bloodthirsty and capable--but Laufey would never send him into battle so young if he wasn't desperate for troops.

It was a fine morning when Fárbauti came home. It was one of the few bright days in Jötunheimr, and Loki and Býleistr were studying when one of the healers came in and began whispering with their tutor, Angrboda. Angrboda looked flushed with concern.

"Children," Angrboda said, "your sire has returned. He asks for your presence in the healing rooms."

Loki and Býleistr put away their learning things, and Angrboda handed them off to a guard who escorted them down a flight of stairs into a lit underground cavern. "Your sire is in a private room," the guard said, leading them down a corridor behind the stairwell to a small room. 

Fárbauti lay on a cushioned bed, his eyes half closed but aware. Loki saw his sires leg, sliced open clean to the bone. He would've covered Býleistr's eyes, if he could reach high enough. The wound was cleaning, but bleeding heavily. A healer worked next to it, slowly pulling off nasty wrappings that would've been hastily applied on the battle field.

Fárbauti reached up a heavy hand as Loki sat by his bedside, encompassing Loki's tiny one in it. "Sire, does it hurt?" Býleistr asked, his hand trailing on Fárbauti's shoulder.

Fárbauti struggled for breath for a moment, but answered the question, "badly, my child." His eyes rolled back for a moment, before blinking to awareness. "It is a joy... To see you two again... I was afraid..." His eyes lost focus after a moment more, slowly falling shut.

Loki's eyes darted to his chest in the same moment that Býleistr pressed a finger beneath their sire's chin. It was only the steady rise and fall of Fárbauti's breath that kept Loki from panicking.

"Will he live?" Loki barked at the healer.

"He has lost much blood, Loki Prince," the healer said, "but with time and rest now that we have the blood staunched and the area disinfected, he will live again happy. I doubt he will do battle again, however. I am sorry."

"Thank you," Loki said to the healer. "We will stay for now, and sit with him."

"That is fine." The healer said curtly.

* * *

So even the mighty Fárbauti, Striker of the North, fell. It was not long later that they received an urgent message saying that the Jötnar had lost any prospect for Midgard, and that the Æsir would be coming.

Loki and Býleistr hid in a small chamber together, attending their sire as they could. Far above their heads, the battle raged.

Loki worried for his dam, and for Helblindi. It was surely terror up there, and not in a kind Loki could appreciate.

In the heart of the second night of the battle, something changed. Something was very, very wrong. There was once something Loki had never noticed before, and now that it was gone it occupied all of Loki's attention. Even the groggy Fárbauti gave a gasp at the loss, but Loki just moved closer to his sire and rubbed his forehead.

Two days after the loss, Loki convinced Býleistr he would be able to cloak himself into invisibility fine and see if it was safe.

It was refreshing to be out of the small room, but the fresh air did not soften Loki's primal fear, and the longing for what he'd never noticed before.

When he got upstairs, it was like he'd walked into an entirely different city. The Ice City was in unlivable ruins, torn and blasted apart. Jötnar and Æsir lay dead everywhere, but Loki could see no one alive.

He rushed to the temple, which looked like it'd sustained less damage. He revealed himself to his dam inside, bleeding slowly but alive.

"Odin..." Laufey grumbled... "He stole the Casket... We are nothing..."

"My dam, it can't be true," Loki whispered.

"I am so sorry, Loki." Laufey said, his breath thinning a bit.

"Don't be." Said Loki, "it'll be fine. I'll find you healers. Somewhere."

* * *

The Ice City was declared uninhabitable. The Asgardians had broken through the oldest, thickest layers of ice, showing the primordial ravines below. The Asgardians had looted the palace, and the homes in the city itself. Buildings had been leveled all over the city, and the palace was an increasingly unstable behemoth on the skyline, ever threatening to fall despite its abandon. The palace was a building of such mass that if it finally toppled, it would break all the ice holding the city up and drop everyone into the ravine. Once people were well enough to travel, a move to Utgard began.

Utgard was the only other real city in Jötunheimr. When the Æsir had stormed Jötunheimr, they only had the prerogative of taking the Casket of Ancient Winters, so the Jötnar would be bound to Jötunheimr. There was little destruction outside of the Ice City.

Utgard was nothing like the Ice City. While the Ice City had beautiful, carved, tall buildings that caught all the light, Utgard was a dark place. All the buildings were short and uniformly shaped (rectangles). 

The new palace was the largest building. It rose only three stories, and was as squat as the rest of the place.

Most of Loki's things hadn't lasted the battle. Fine furs and jewels lost to the fray, stolen by Asgardian looters. His metal throwing knives were gone too, along with many of his books.

In fact, all the books were gone. To prevent the creation of another casket, the Allfather had ordered that the royal library be burnt to the ground. All Loki had salvaged from the ruins was a book of anatomy and a history of Jötunheimr. Important, yes... But not what Loki wanted.

It'd seemed Loki's traditional education in magic had to draw to a close.

Loki received his first scars only a year after moving into Utgard. The ceremony didn't feel special, it felt grim. He screamed all through the scarring, because without the Casket there was no magical ice to numb the wound.

Loki grew. It seemed like only days after receiving his own scars Býleistr recieved his, even though in reality, Býleistr was fifteen years younger than he.

For his credit, Loki made good use of himself as well as he could. He could never win in a fight of strength, but with weaponry and magic he had no match.

Býleistr also grew. He was almost as clever as Loki knew himself to be, but Loki also knew he was clumsy and uncharismatic. He was squat in the middle in terms of height, and he was fairly strong. Býleistr would make good on his life of fading into the background, Loki thought privately.

The brothers were all close, as brothers should be. Helblindi and Býleistr were fiercely protective of their runty brother, which Loki found endearing, although it was almost embarrassing. Loki found it fun to talk them into tracks, so they all seemed to thoroughly antagonize each other. Helblindi and Býleistr presented Loki and each other fine, precious furs from animals they'd hunted themselves, while Loki gifted the, unique magical artifacts in return.

His magic was definitely something to be proud of. Lacking the completeness of a traditional education, much of Loki's work he devised and crafted himself. He knew his parents worried, because crafting new magic was nasty business, but he was one of the most powerful sorcerers in the Nine Realms as the years went on, and he studied and experimented. Jötunheimr knew him as a genius. The other realms knew not of him.

He was so lonely though. He watched Helblindi take a mate, and it only reminded him of his own ineptitude. He liked Fálki enough. Fálki was dim witted, but he was pleasant company. Helblindi said the sex was good, and Loki balked, to Helblindi's laughter.

Loki didn't really have a lack of suitors, it was just that they all terrified him. Most of them were easily more than the twice the size of him, which was actually particularly large for Frost Giants. Some of them managed to dwarf Helblindi, even his own sire. How could he lay with that? He would hardly breach them, or they would split him in half!

He tried not to let his loneliness show. He knew his parents were concerned. But what else could Loki do? The war had destroyed any chance of finding him a home in the other realms.

So time passed.

 


	6. A Turning

Perhaps a hundred years following the war, Odin noticed a change in his son. Thor had always been brash and reckless, and often spoke before he thought.

Thor also liked to repeat stories, as many men of Asgard. Stories untold before were almost as valuable as actual currency in Asgard. But Odin had noticed that the stories Thor repeated were getting gorier, and his language was getting vile.

Thor was becoming as ignorant and prejudiced as any average young Æsir. He belittled the mages of Vanaheimr, and he insulted the... size of the Light Elves of Álfheimr. He spoke of the Jötnar as savage, unthinking beasts, perhaps worst of all.

Odin saw terror in Thor's underestimation of Jötnar. They were greatly weakened, yes, but they weren't stupid. They were also vengeful. If Thor turned a blind eye to them, Odin knew that the Jötnar would find a way to steal back their casket, and in that instance, it'd never be found. 

* * *

Fárbauti found his son in the private courtyard. Loki was nearly sweating with the exertion, forming knife after knife. The rejects lay in an ever mounting pile as Loki seethed in frustration.

Fárbauti watched as Loki formed another fine knife, slashing it though the air. But there was no squelch, there was no shimmer, there was no rip. All Loki was doing was throwing a knife through the air like a plain lunatic.

"Loki," Fárbauti said. "It is impossible."

"I don't care," Loki said in a low, rhythmic voice as he crafted another fine edge. "I want to travel. I want to see."

"We cannot create ice with special properties without the Casket, Loki. It is not possible, even with your seidr," Fárbauti explained.

"I'll find a way, my sire," Loki said definitively. He gave another swipe through the air, before finally letting out an enraged howl. Loki through the knife away from himself, stalking away as his sire looked at it on the ground, where it had knocked a wind chime off the tree on impact.

* * *

"You know brother," Loki had said, "your ice magic is more abundant than mine, is it not?"

"In sheer mass, I would say so," Býleistr answered, "why?"

"You want to escape this realm to, don't you?" Asked Loki.

"I would like to explore," Býleistr caved, "but without the Casket it is impossible," he said mournfully, knitting his eyebrows together in suspicion.

"Maybe," said Loki.

"What are you thinking, brother?" asked Býleistr.

"An idea," said Loki, "perhaps you would like to help me."

"Tell me, you mischievous runt."

"Alright then," Loki said in a delicate lilt.

He then led Býleistr into a deep, little used cavern, far from the courts prying eyes. "When I try to combine my seidr and my ice magic to create the Ripping Knife," said Loki, "it is too much work. I know my seidr can create the special properties, but it takes to much energy. I exhaust too fast."

Býleistr raised an eyebrow, but didn't speak. So Loki continued, "perhaps if I combine your ice magic with my seidr, there will be enough power."

"It's worth a try." Býleistr said after a moment.

"Excellent," said Loki, "let us try." He reached for Býleistr's hand, feeling a surge of delicious power at the contact.

Býleistr screamed. Loki was stealing Loki was hurting his power his magic his blood _Loki was stealing everything._  


"Stop, stop!" Býleistr screamed.

"Just a moment more," Loki said through his teeth. He finally let go of Býleistr's hand, catching a dagger in the air before it fell. He ignored a heavy whump as Býleistr fell over backwards, unable to summon the strength to keep himself stand.

"Lets try it!" Loki said brightly. He sliced the knife through the air. The knife squelched and shimmered, but the rip faded before Loki could stick his hands in. He tried several times to the same effect, knowing the knife got duller every try.

"Maybe we should try again." Loki said throwing the knife aside. "Maybe not." he said, noticing his unconscious brother on the floor. "You'll find your way back," he shrugged, and walked away.

* * *

 Býleistr woke up sore and aching. His skin was far to hot for it to be healthy. He looked around, and he recognized where he was. Yes, Loki had brought him here.

Somehow, Býleistr wasn't angry with Loki for hurting him and leaving him behind, as he probably should have been. He got to his feet, feeling tired already, but he hobbled his way to the storerooms, finally finding a shelf of pots painted blue.

The liquid they contained was very rare, and only used to heal a fatally overheating Jötunn. But Býleistr needed it... He picked up the heavy pot and poured it over his head, feeling the relief drip over his body.

Now he would find a place to sleep.

* * *

Frigga sat outside the training ring, watching her son. She watched broad muscles ripple under the thin cloth, as he and that devilish boy (what was his name, was it Fandral?) spar. They'd been at it for awhile, and they were both drenched sticky in sweat.

Finally, Thor managed to parry Fandral's sword away, clattering the dull practice blade onto the gravel. Thor kicked his partner down, pressing his own practice sword against Fandral's neck, smirking for a moment, before putting the sword down and helping his friend up.

Frigga watched him slap Fandral on the back as he gloated, Fandral rubbing his fingers on his wispy beard. Frigga waved at Fandral and walked away.

* * *

Býleistr was troubling. He was shorter than Helblindi, but had the same stocky, muscular build. But it seemed as if he was losing muscle mass, but they were not distended or fading from disuse.

That was frightening to Fárbauti, as his sire. He knew there must be a logical reason for Býleistr to be losing his musculature. But Býleistr trained hard and often, and he ate well.

So the only options left were disease, or meddling.

Fárbauti summoned a spy, an uneasy feeling settling in his gut.

When the spy came back to him three days later, he informed Fárbauti that Loki had combined he and his brothers magic to create a Ripping Knife. Loki had left the realm and left his brother unconscious on the floor.

* * *

Thor and his friends had gone on a lengthy quest, and would be returning in the morning, and Volstagg had suggested a carouse while they had the chance, as travelers pubs were always the rowdiest. The Álfheimr town they planned to stay the night in had several taverns, and they already drank themselves stupid in the first one.

Thor wasn't exactly sure how he seemed to have lost his friends in the fray, or where to find them again. He also wasn't sure why he and a Dark Elf were sharing a drink between them, but he wasn't all that inclined to move.

The Dark Elf was laughing and recounting a story from a venture to Jötunheimr recently. "They let me meet the middle princeling, yes they did." The elf crooned, spilling some of the mead on his shirt.

"What of him?" Thor asked.

"Tiny." The elf dead panned, taking a very long drink. Thor laughed raucously. "Snappish thing," said the Elf, "bratty. Manipulative son of a bitch."

"Aren't all the Jötnar bitches? They all have their own cunts, don't they?" Thor laughed.

"We'll, they're very open," the elf over-enunciated 'very'. "So yeah, I'm pretty sure they do. But that Loki brat... Dressed head to toe in gold. Nasty temper, would pluck jewels off people if he liked 'em, and kept them. Could convince anyone to do anything for him. Had his little group of suitors following him, all wanting to get their cocks into his tight little cunt." 

Thor laughed very hard at that one, taking a long, languid drink when he felt someone pulling on his collar. "Get up," whispered Sif, "Hogun's beating the ass off this fellow at cards."

"He always does." 

"Particularly so, this time," said Sif.

Thor got up, and cheered for his friend. After a little while, the Vanir Hogun was playing cards with swept his cards away in disgust. 

A gaunt, dark looking man stepped out of the crowd. "I think it's my turn, this time." He said, sitting opposite of Hogun, and Hogun began dealing the cards. The stranger was almost as tall as Thor, and very pale and skinny. He had raven black hair, that Thor wanted desperately to touch... And such knowing green eyes...

"Stop swooning." Sif said with a swift elbow to his side. "You're no ergi." Thor laughed at that one, but Sif just scoffed.

Thor returned his attention to the game, where Hogun appeared to be frustrated. The strange was smirking, and not much later, Hogun threw up his cards as had the player from before. 

Thor laughed as his friends went to console Hogun on his loss, but he followed the stranger, walking up to him brashly and asking, "what's your name?"

The stranger looked at him for a moment, wrinkling his nose and finally saying, "Loptr."

"What a nice name." Thor crooned, moving himself closer to the stranger.

"I suppose," said Loptr.

Thor remembered no more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Býleistr douses himself in liquid nitrogen.


	7. The Thing About Liberation

Thor awoke to screaming.

"Lady Sif! What's wrong?" Fandral was shouting, shaking her shoulders.

Sif turned around quickly and slapped Fandral, who gasped and raised his hand to rest against the reddening flesh. "It's your fault!" she shrieked at Thor, who finally groggily noticed an absence. Her beautiful golden blonde hair, radiant like the sun, had been sheared off. "Your fault!" she screamed at Thor.

"What happened?" Thor asked, unable to recollect any further than the stranger Loptr.

"We came to retire, found you and the stranger asleep in you bed," mumbled Volstagg, "followed the logical course of events."

"And he's gone now, made off with my hair!" shrieked Sif.

* * *

Loki rubbed the hair between his fingers. They'd be after him soon, he figured, as he sat on an outcrop of rocks in the forest.

He'd have to return to Jötunheimr soon, and he'd probably be returning to a heap of trouble. Not probably. Definitely.

Strangely, he didn't really care. Would he be confined to his chamber? Not much different from day to day life, where any move out of the ordinary for him was regarded with suspicion.

Loki stared at the Æsir's hair between his fingers. He took out the Ripping Knife, wrapping it up in the long blonde hair. He channeled some seid through the hair. It glowed, then faded to black.

The knife inside had absorbed the gold. It worked! According to a legend Thiazi had once told him, the essence of Idunn's apples in this very hair would make sure the knife would never dull, melt, or break.

He ripped into Jotunheimr, and began his trek home to Utgard. He changed his skin back to his normal shade of a deep, cobalt blue, and curled his cloak around himself. At an outcrop of rocks against the wind, he changed quickly into his normal clothes, hiding the Ripping Knife and the Æsir child's hair within his cloak, and began to walk again.

It was a long trek, but he so came upon a quaint village in his journey.

It was a quiet place, but Loki strode straight to the largest house upon the square, setting his diadem upon his head and knocking upon the door.

The door opened soon after his initial knock. A large and brusque Frost Giant answered, meeting Loki on the threshold. "What do you want?" he demanded. Loki only smiled and adjusted his diadem, bringing the large Frost Giant's attention to it. 

The giant gasped. "Why, Loki prince, this is most unexpected!"

 "I apologize for my intrusion," said Loki, "I only wish for shelter for the night." 

"Do come in!" said the giant, "I am Ulfr. Please, please make yourself welcome, princeling." He ushered Loki inside, and Loki smiled at him again and entered the modest home. 

It was furnished in a simple way, with only what the man Ulfr would need. He could swear he saw some children peaking out from beside another wall, perhaps two, but they were gone again as soon as Loki had laid eyes upon them. Another Jötunn stood by a cupboard. "This is Aghi," said Ulfr.

"It is a blessing to meet you both," Loki said, "may I sit?"

"Of course, Loki prince," said Aghi in a deep, rumbling voice. Loki pulled out a chair at the table and perched himself upon it. He felt very small in this chair. He had a special one at home. Such inconveniences.

"Álfjótr!" Ulfr yelled, and Loki turned around to find a young Jötunn playing with his hair. "That's rude!" Ulfr said, "He's the prince."

Álfjótr gasped and pulled his hands away, but Loki gestured to have him join him on his lap. The young one was perhaps half Loki's size, and he was very heavy, but Loki tried to ignore that. "How old is he?" he asked.

"Sixteen years. The other, Heinrikr is eight. He will surely follow." Aghi said, and sure enough, another small one joined the room.

Álfjótr pulled Loki's hair, playing with the gold beads woven into it. "Please don't," Loki said, "it hurts."

"Sorry," Álfjótr said, "they're pretty."

"He hasn't seen anything so nice." Ulfr said.

Loki pulled out the dagger from his cloak, and cut off the hand full of hair. He pulled the beads out, giving them to Álfjótr. "Keep them."

Aghi gasped. "Oh no, we can't accept that." 

"It's nothing," Loki said.

"This could save us!" Ulfr said, picking up his son and looking at the beads in his hands. "Thank you, thank you!"

"This is far too much, Loki prince," said Aghi.

"I'm happy to give," said Loki. "consider it payment for food and a bed."

"You give us hope, Loki prince," said Ulfr, "know, Loki prince, that the Jötnar will be happy for any hope at all."

* * *

In the morning, Loki woke up with Heinrikr lying against his back. He stretched, and Heinrikr yawns, blinking. "You're very nice, Loki prince." 

"Thank you, Heinrikr," Loki said, rubbing Heinrikr's head. "But I should be leaving now. I have far to go."

"You can take some more food," Heinrikr told him.

* * *

The next morning, Sif's shorn head was beginning to show stubble, which brought about an entirely new storm. "It is black! That bastard turned my hair black! Why does he want it, anyway?"

"Sif, there is nothing we can do now," said Thor, picking up the cloth Sif had torn off from the floor of the chambers, and wrapping it around her head, pinning it with a ruby encrusted clip.

"This is humiliating," Sif stated, adjusting the head piece. "I blame you."

"You have made that fact very clear to me," Thor said with a sigh.

* * *

Loki returned home after a day or so more of walking. The food Heinrikr had offered was endearing, and it was heavy in his stomach halfway through the journey. He wasn't really looking forward to arriving home, (and to his punishment), but there was a point when the cold was all to much, even for a Jötunn. 

He finished his trek to Utgard just as day began to turn to night. The guards let him into the city quietly, and the streets seemed empty as Loki walked toward the palace.

His parents met him in the opening hall. "Good evening," Loki said in the same velvety voice he'd used on the Æsir two nights ago, even though he knew it wouldn't work.

"Loki, there's no getting out of this," said Laufey. "Býleistr told us what the spies didn't."

"And here I thought you trusted me," Loki said with a devious grin.

"Not even we are such fools, Loki," said Fárbauti. "You have disobeyed my instructions to stop working with the knife, you have taken advantage of your younger brother, and you have disappeared for three days. That is unacceptable."

"But don't you want to hear what I've accomplished?" Loki said, his fingers curling around the Ripping Knife in the inner pocket of his cloak.

"We will hear what you have done after you've spent a moonrise confined to your chambers," said Laufey.

"You'd best take yourself there, now," Fárbauti figured.

"Of course," Loki said with a scowl.

* * *

"You're always in trouble, aren't you?" Loki recognized the deep voice. It was Fálki.

"I believe you've found the wrong chambers," said Loki. "Helblindi's are directly above. I've heard his bed rocking." 

Fálki snorted. "Sorry."

"No you're not," Loki said, sitting up with a sigh. "Alright, what do you want?" 

"Only to talk," Fálki said.

"Sure I can not bribe you off?" 

"There's nothing you can give me that Helblindi can't."

"I suppose you're right, in that regard. What do you want to speak of, then?" asked Loki.

"May I sit?" Fálki gestured to the bed.

"Make yourself comfortable," sighed Loki.

Fálki sat down on the large bed, stretching his feet against it, which leaned against Loki's hip. "Helblindi said that you told your parents you have made a revelation. What is it?" 

"I'm afraid I mustn't tell you yet," said Loki.

"Well, Loki prince, know that the warriors of Jötunheimr will follow any prince who can lead us out of the dark," said Fálki, "we return power to those who give it."

"I wouldn't do that to my brother," Loki sighs, "leave. I tire of you."

"Oh Loki," said Fálki, "always hospitable."

* * *

"How are you, Brother?" Býleistr asked, entering Loki's chambers without asking.

"You aren't angry with me? I took advantage of you, after all," said Loki.

"Not particularly," said Býleistr, "now answer the question."

"I've been informed by commoners, children, nobility, including my brother's mate that if I liberate Jötunheimr they will overthrow our brother, and possibly our parents, and install me upon the throne. How do you think I feel?" ranted Loki.

"Confused," said Býleistr after a moment. "However, I doubt what they're saying is true. They're just desperate."

"What do you mean?"

"These people are bound to a miserable realm, with no hope of improving or even rebuilding most of it. And then the brilliant prince, a master of seidr disappears for days out of nowhere and acts interesting. They're desperate to get out of the situation, and now they cling to you."

"I don't want them to!"

"It's not like you can actually liberate Jötunheimr, Loki," said Býleistr, but Loki was curiously silent. "Loki?" he asked.

"Thiazi once told me a story," said Loki, "that if one took an Asgardian maidens hair and used it upon a Ripping Knife, the knife would be indestructible," said Loki.

Býleistr nodded. "And the results?" 

"His story proved true," Loki said after a moment, pulling the knife from under his pillow. "and that is why I remain indecisive."

"Why indecisive? Either you free us and take power, or you let us suffer and have Helblindi crowned."

Loki frowned. "I want to save Jötunheimr. I do. But I don't want to be king. I never have. I'm Loki, free like the wind."

"More like Loki, hotheaded as the fire. You'd make a lousy king."

"Aren't you reassuring."

"You're not going to save us because you don't want responsibility. Aren't you selfish."


	8. In Pursuit of Knowledge

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out our shiny new summary and title! Whoa!

After his punishment, Loki was not pressed for the discovery he'd mentioned before, so he kept it a secret from his parents.

 Instead, Loki and Býleistr bonded over it. Sure, Býleistr hated that Loki refused to help the realm with his work, but he swallowed the excuse that Loki wanted to learn before he attempted anything.

Really, Loki was scared.

Býleistr liked hunting alone (called it good thinking time) and Loki wanted to explore his skill more. Sadly neither of them were allowed to leave Utgard alone.

So they said they went on brotherly hunting trips. Helblindi was so absorbed in his own business he didn't even ask to be invited--a blessing.

Loki and Býleistr split up every time at the same land mark--a huge towering rock jutting from the ground, three days walk from Utgard. Legend had it the Casket of Ancient Winters had been forged atop it, but the rock was long since abandoned. They would always agree to meet back at the rock in a week's time.

Loki would rip into whatever realm suited he, and Býleistr would wander off in search of the hunt.

Loki explored everywhere. 

He loved Midgard. He was glad he didn't have to rule it, but it was an enjoyable place to be. Everything changed so quickly in Midgard. Often, men and women he dallied with once on Midgard would be gone by the time he returned. He fathered many children in Midgard, devilish children who inherited the features of Loki's Æsir skin. He also visited war rooms or impeded people's homes, showing up in a cloud of smoke. He gave advice that was either helpful or deadly--and enjoyed watching the Midgardians argue over whether or not to listen to him. He also enjoyed the often bloody results of his encounters.

The Midgardians were quirky, in the ways that they adapted around several heinous setbacks of their mortality. He loved their ingenious devices that made up for the brute strength the lacked. He loved the various make up fads he watched come and go, often hilariously toxic--such as the English women who spread lead paint upon their cheeks to hide small pox scars. The women who bound their feet in the East were singularly interesting, and the site of one unwrapped was one that disturbed even Loki. 

The Midgardians were also amusingly bloodthirsty. Wars in the Nine Realms were rare, but devastating--Midgardians fought all the time. Wars Loki witnessed on Midgard were called for no real reason, or were laughable failures. Wars Loki knew from home were started in true, irreversible rage, and always caused much loss on every side.

But Midgard wasn't the only place Loki frequented. 

In Svartálfheimr, Loki loved the markets. He would bring his carefully carved ice weapons, that he had charmed to never melt. The money was good, simply because Frost Giant made weapons were scarce, and thus sold for higher prices. 

He bought himself new jewels with the money, in beautiful bright colors. He wove them into his hair and strung them along his gold jewelry. He bought Býleistr dwarf made weaponry. In exchange, Býleistr gave Loki a share of the furs from the animals he killed.

Álfheimr had raucous, exhilarating festivals. Dancing, food, pretty elvish women. The elves were light hearted and fun loving, a perfect break from the monotony and dreariness of Utgard.

Loki tended to avoid Vanaheimr, except to steal books. He stole so many Vanir books on magic, engorging his knowledge of seidr to all limits. He always put the books back when he was done though... Loki knew when he and his brothers were young, they were all starving to learn. However, Helblindi and Býleistr's desire to learn had diminished as they grew... Loki's drive to learn only grew stronger... And Vanaheimr had the best libraries in the Nine Realms... Except for Asgard.

 

* * *

Loki and Býleistr parted as they always did, and Loki readied himself to leave. He peeled away the dark blue from his skin, leaving milk white Æsir flesh underneath. He turned his eyes to green, and transformed his clothes into a simple mages uniform.

This was a damn risky endeavor, but he want to see if he could trick even Odin Allfather. As long as he could remember, he'd blocked his affairs from the prying eyes of Heimdallr and the Allfather, but to trick their people so blatantly?

The idea of triumph made his fingers curled in excitement. Failure would simply be another adventure.

Loki ripped his way out of the bitter winds of Jötunheimr, and into a small grove of trees outside an Asgardian village. He was definitely mussed like a travel, do he found his way out of the woods, and through the fields.

The Æsir managing the crops didn't spare him any regard as they worked. All the better for Loki. Some of the younger children did look, and Loki smiled a crooked smile for them. Then the children would look away.

He wandered into town, marveling at the familiarity of it. Add some snow, double the size of the buildings, and this could be a Jötnar village. 

He bought food, and walked on. His walk took nearly six hours, but Loki was used to tiresome walks. His feet complained, but he pushed on, arriving in the city of Asgard at nightfall. 

Finding the first inn he could, he wandered inside, distraught and weary from travel. "I'd like a room," he said to the innkeeper. 

"Ah, yes, er, twenty gold 'uns for the evening, sir," the innkeeper said. Loki could tell he was lying, just looking for the extra money upon sight of Loki's mage clothes. Mages were the sons of rich men. Wandering sons, but with a wealthy background. 

Loki sighed, too tired to argue, and gave the man to money. 

When the innkeeper woke up in the morning, the guest was gone. The room was trashed in his wake, and the money he paid the night before vanished into the air.

* * *

 In the morning, Loki walked until he found a reasonable book shop. 

He'd changed his clothes into wealthier clothes most Vanir nobility wore, and it suited him well. 

He found himself browsing in the back, a small section of magic books. He brought them to the front, and paid the owner. The tomes were mostly beginner, but bringing them back to Jötunheimr would be beneficial to many besides him. Since Odin had burned the great library of the Ice City, there was little to aid learning in Jötunheimr. Loki had been slowly bringing books in from Vanaheimr and Álfheimr to keep them in his room, but Asgard ultimately had the most and the best books.

He paid easily, and the owner smiled at him. "Do you know where I might find a wider selection of magic books?" Loki asked.

"That's all we have public prints of, but there's lots in the palace library. You're free to browse, if you'll pay," the bookseller informed him. "It's through the west public hall."

"Thank you for your assistance," Loki said, dropping a few extra coins onto the counter and departing with his books. Once he was in the streets, he tucked the books into an enchanted pocket in his cloak. 

He went to the public hall on the west side of the behemoth of a palace, seeing the archway at the end with runes carved into the stone above saying, "LIBRARY". 

He walked to the front, and finds himself facing some guards. "Going rate is five gold pieces an hour," the first said.

Loki gave him the money with a smile, and the guard rolls his eyes and waves him in. 

This library was everything Loki has dreamed of. The ceiling is so high, books lining to the top of all the walls. Some Æsir mill about, but not many.

He retreated to the back of the magic section, getting on his knees and reading the faded spines of old seidr books. They all look so interesting, but Loki knows that he must only choose one. He mustn't create suspicion.

But which?

He pulled out a tome on doubles, doppelgängers, and decoys, brushing his hands on the cover. This book could give him the information that he needed to finally create a double that doesn't need constant instruction from him... No. He must pick something for the good of the realm. Who knew when he might deem it safe to come back? It is not like Loki could make a habit of this. 

He climbed one of the ladders, propelling him further into the books. He slides the ladder down a bit as he browses the titles. He sees books about potions and useful household spells. He finds more books on decoys, some books studying dwarfish magic, others on the history of magic.

He climbed higher, seven stories from the ground, but several still to go when he finds a thin book shoved out of order atop some others. He retrieves the text, reading the embossed cover slowly "On Crafting Artifacts". He opened it to the first page, an illustration of the Tesseract, Odin's famous treasure, lost in the sands of Midgard.

He flipped through the pages of the tome, determining it to be a text of philosophy on how artifacts such as the Tesseract, the Casket, and Mjölnir where crafted. 

What is it doing here, for the public to find? Loki didn't care. An apprentice reshelving the library made a mistake, he figured. He tucked the book into his enchanted pocket, elation pulsing through his veins.

He pulled out the Ripping Knife from his cloak, and departs from Asgard.

A minor miscalculation on his part, not to notice the librarian watching from below.


	9. The New Casket

Odin sat at a table, turning the paper over in his hands. He already knew what the papers would contain. There was no other real reason for the Master Librarian to write for him.

The book had been found.

He unfolded the letter, and began to read.

_Odin Allfather--_

_Today a stranger, dark of face and demeanor came to the library. He was dressed like a noble of Vanaheimr, but the crest on his clothes did not match that of any well known Vanir families._

_The stranger looked in the back, within the magic books, pulling out several and reading. However, as his hour in the library drew to a close, he found the book "On Crafting Artifacts". He stowed it within his cloak, and drew a weapon, before vanishingly from the library and from perhaps the realm._

_All this information was relayed by the guards at the front and the spy Amora, as was instructed by you, Allfather, after planting the book within the library._

_\--Vör_

Odin frowned. So Loki had finally learned a way to enchant the ice and rip through the realms without the Casket. No other race traveled like the Jötnar once did, and word from the Nine said Loki was the only living Jötnar powerful enough.

Odin heard much about the princes of Jötunheimr as gossip traveled through the realms, transmitted by the dwarves and dark elves, who still traded with the Jötnar.

Fárbauti and Laufey had spoiled their sons. The three princes were notorious for it. Dirty mouthed, shallow, and greedy, they apparently did well in terrorizing their court, and one was always in trouble for one thing or another.

Odin knew it was only a matter of time before Loki became a threat to Asgard, but hopefully the false information would set Loki off track for a while. Or get him into so much trouble the Jötnar would remove the threat all together.

* * *

When they met at the rock, Býleistr could tell that his older brother was excited. He was smiling, which Loki never did, unless he was stealing.

Býleistr hauled a best upon his back. Loki attempted to make small talk, touching the white fur from the paw hanging down within Loki's reach. "This will make a mighty fine fur, brother mine," said Loki appreciatively.

"You can have it, if you'll just tell me what you're dying to say," said Býleistr. 

Loki rolled his eyes, but reached into his cloak and pulled out a very small book. Býleistr had loved books once, when he was still small and there were so many books for him to read.

But when the library was burned, Býleistr lost interest in reading. All that was left for a long time were ten dull and pretentious tomes Býleistr practically had memorized. Loki brought home lots of books when he could, and Býleistr knew where he hid them, but these texts were made for elves and Vanir, far too small for Býleistr's hands. 

The book Loki held was smaller than usual, and Býleistr asked, "what is it?" 

"It's a book of philosophy, you oaf," said Loki, "on crafting items like the Casket."

"You think you could do it, make another, with this tome, Loki?" Býleistr asked, as the two began to walk home to Utgard. 

"I think I can. It would surely help me greatly," said Loki.

"Know, my brother, if you truly think you may craft out realm a new Casket," said Býleistr, "I will do anything to help you accomplish it."

"My thanks, Bý," said Loki, "you've always been most helpful."

"It would make you great, you know," said Býleistr, "none else would deserve the throne."

Loki fell silent, and Býleistr let him. They had a long journey home yet.

* * *

Loki came home in a fearsome mood. The princes made it back in time for a holiday meal. Which holiday, Loki was unsure. Perhaps it was Fálki's name day again. That one always seemed to sneak up on him. 

Loki sat next to his brother's and smiled, even though inside, he was stewing. He wanted to be in his rooms, reading that damn Æsir book.

He sighed, looking at Helblindi, who sat at their dam's side. He was wearing a lovely pendant. On his special chair, Loki cared to think he could reach. So as his brother bent over to slurp, or perhaps eat, his fish, Loki's fingers encircled the pendant as he broke the chain and grabbed it, holding it close to his face. He scrutinized the pendant for a long moment.

Helblindi let out a gasp, crying out where there broken chain dug into his skin. He rubbed his hand on his neck, scowling at his brother. "Spoiled runt," he snarled. 

Laufey laughed, and Fárbauti seemed as if he was trying to swallow his chuckles. They watched the little prince stare at the pendant, not even noticing his brother's annoyance. "I would have it," Loki said after a moment.

"It's mine," Helblindi protested.

"No," said his little brother.

"It was a git from Fálki," complained Helblindi.

"No longer," said Loki callously, carefully unhooking one of his own chains and adding the pendant aside a gold one Laufey had given him some time ago.

"Feisty," complimented Fárbauti, but Loki just smirked and returned to slowly eating his meal. Helblindi sighed, and gave up the pendant. It wasn't like he had a shortage of pendants, but he'd happened to like that one.

Helblindi looked across the table at Fálki, who just smiled widely, as always. Helblindi took the opportunity when Loki wasn't looking to muss up his soft black hair, veiling Loki's vision. Loki squalled, and shook his hair back into place, slapping Helblindi sharply with the side of his hand. 

Helblindi laughed that time. Loki had always liked shiny things.

* * *

It seemed like hours later that Loki found his way to his chambers. He fell asleep before he could do anything, still wrapped in his cloak.

When Loki woke in the morning, he stretched and began some chores. He lifted the charm from his book shelf, bringing all of his tomes into appearance. He set the magic books next to the other thirty he'd slowly collected, but left the book from the library on his bed. He restored his invisibility charm, and hid the library book in his cloak.

He went off to take a bath, slowly washing his hair in the warm water. He used a brush to carefully clean out the lines of his scars, taking thought of them for the first time in so very long.

Since they'd lost the war, none but the most sacred of scars were given--the scars draping down under the chin and to the shoulders and arms. The scars that said he was of age.

But Loki, being Loki could care less for the pain. He had scars given to him as he achieved in his life, getting scars all the way up and down his limbs, curling on his back and splaying on the sides of his stomach. Not many young Jötnar had full scars like Loki had, but not many could stand the pain of even their name day scars without the ritual ice. The Casket was need for that.

Loki finished bathing, did his hair, and fixed all of his piercings. He returned to his room and lied down upon the bed, pulling out the book and turning it over in his hands.

He opened the book carefully and began to read.

It must've been hours later when he came across the fateful line, but it felt like minutes.

 _It is known for sure_ , it read, _that the soul of a blood relative of the maker was given to forge the Casket. That unknown Jötunn never saw an afterlife but the cage of the Casket._

Loki froze for a moment, unsure how to react. Then he figured out how to react. He threw the book aside, and curled into himself, not caring as the spine must have cracked and the pages dog eared.

The book had given Loki exactly what he had wanted. He knew how the original Casket was forged then, from the Æsir who studied it. It contained the soul of a relative of the forger, and all of the forger's seidr.

Loki rubbed his eyelids, daring to move the muscle. Would he be able to do it? Would he have the power to? What if he took a life, and he failed? What would happen to him then? He doubted he'd be bound to his chambers for killing...

The worst part was, Loki knew Bý would do it. He'd give anything for the good of the realm. Loki wasn't short a volunteer.

But no. Loki would not lose his brother. His brother who gave him anything he asked. His brother who knew Loki walked all over him, but allowed him to anyways. His brother, who knew Loki's secret with the knife. His dear, sweet, younger brother...

No, there would not be a new Casket forged. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to mention that, in Midgard time, we've reached modern times. So Loki and Thor are wracking up the years.
> 
> Have I ever mentioned I hate the AO3 text editor?


	10. O, Fálki

 

Loki put the book behind the others in his collection. He wanted to not bring it up again, but it shouldn't have surprised him that Býleistr brought it up.

"So, what'd you learn from that Æsir book?" Býleistr asked, sitting on the floor next to Loki's bed. Loki was trying not to seem nervous, lying on his bed and playing with his hair.

"It's rubbish," Loki lied, "pure drivel."

"That's a disappointment," said Býleistr, "you were excited."

"No I wasn't."

"You were smiling."

"So?"

"It actually reached your eyes."

Loki snorted. "It doesn't matter. Book or not, we're still back where we started." He brushed his hair away from himself, off the bed and into Býleistr's chest. Býleistr looked down on his older brother as he sat on the floor, but then he began to comb his fingers through what was loose of Loki's long hair.

"But it's no move back, is it, brother? Not a loss." 

Loki sighed. "I could've taken something for the benefit of the realm, but all I got was trash."

"I'm sure you must have learned something in Asgard."

"Well, yes," said Loki quietly, "the Crown Prince's name day is three days away now. He is to be crowned on it. What fun."

"Loki, that's a perfect time to go in!" said Býleistr, "They'll be focused on the coronation, it will make them weak!"

"You're not suggesting we actually steal the Casket from Asgard--" 

Býleistr interrupted him, "why not? You could take Helblindi, too. He'd be happy. He could take the glory, and that would seal off your little problem with the Jötunheimr wanting to give you power."

Loki quieted for a moment. He thought on it. The Æsir would be weak on the Crown Prince's name day... 

"Get our brother in here, Bý," Loki finally conceded.

Býleistr yanked his fingers out of Loki's hair, causing Loki to yelp. 

He got up, and quickly ran up the stairs to Helblindi's room, where he found both Helblindi and his mate undressed on the bed. Grating. "Ew, seperate," said Býleistr.

"You're the one that walked in," Helblindi grunted. "What do you want?"

"Loki wants to talk to you," Býleistr said, leaning on the frame of the archway.

"I'll be down in twenty minutes, _now get out_ , you little brat," Helblindi snarled. On top of him, Fálki grunted.

Býleistr padded out, trying to erase the incident from his mind. He didn't mind sex, but he wasn't easily titillated. And the idea of his brother doing it--much less physical proof--was just nothing short of revolting.

"They're going at it again," Bý said as way of greeting, walking back into Loki's quarters.

"Do they ever stop?" Loki pouted, "you're so lucky you don't have to listen when the bed starts squeaking." Býleistr laughed. "I'm amazed Helblindi hasn't already birthed three or four brats to knock us out of the succession."

"Not for lack of trying," Býleistr said. Býleistr always found it easier to discuss these things with Loki--Loki seemed as disinterested as he was.

"Get on the bed," Loki demanded.

"Why?" asked Býleistr, but he hesitantly got upon Loki's bed, to be rewarded with his small brother crawling into his lap and relaxing.

"Isn't this nice?" Loki asked, smiling in a way that Býleistr could only call devilish.

"For you, probably," said Býleistr, but he contented himself in playing with Loki's hair.

A little while later, Helblindi appeared, disheveled as though hastily dressed, but no worse for wear. "What do you want, little Loki?" he asked.

"People always greet me so kindly," Loki teased. 

"You encourage it. You're just charming," said Helblindi, sitting next to his brothers on Loki's bed. Loki had a small bed and it was a tight fit, and Loki took advantage of that by propping one of his feet on Helblindi's arm as he sat on Býleistr's lap.

Helblindi didn't bother to shrug it off. "So, Loki, what is the purpose of my visit?" he asked.

"You don't enjoy cuddling? We should have more brotherly bonding time," Loki cooed, as if it was the most important thing in the world. just as Helblindi sighed, Loki said, "Oh. I have an idea. Want to help me and Bý steal the Casket of Ancient Winters?"

"That was sudden," Helblindi said, absolutely shocked. "What gives you the idea you can?"

"I have a reality warping always sharp knife I've been hiding from everyone," said Loki, pulling a fine gold colored dagger from the air. He threw it in the air like it was a ball, and caught as he said, "and the Crown Prince's coronation is coming up, so that'll have their guards down a bit." Loki slashed the knife through the air, creating a rip in reality like it was no big deal. He stuck his hands through the rip, pulling it open. "Awful dark in there," he commented, letting the rip close.

That was when Helblindi fell off the bed.

"I think I broke him," said Loki.

"That was pretty blunt for you," commented Býleistr, leaning over and regarding their older brother, who was perfectly fine.

Helblindi pulled himself back on the bed, ignoring Loki, who resettled his feet upon Helblindi's lap. "Are you serious?" he asked, "why have you been hiding this ability?"

"Waiting for the right time," said Loki, suddenly serious, "and it seems the right time is upon us."

"That's smart," said Helblindi, still trying to take it in.

"I've been accused of being intelligent before," said Loki, "I guess this is rather rude of me, all in all."

"Somewhat," said Helblindi, "moving on, what is your plan then, brother?"

"I'll bring us to Asgard's treasure hall," said Loki, "they wouldn't put the Casket anywhere else. It's the most heavily guarded place in Asgard."

"How do you know where it is? It could be anywhere in Asgard," said Helblindi.

Loki tried not to be exasperated with his brother's question. It wasn't like Helblindi had much prior opportunity to understand this seid. "I don't have to know how to get where I want to go," said Loki carefully, "I just have to know that I want to be there."

Helblindi seemed to accept his answer, and Loki said, "we'll fight off the fortifications, but you'll follow my word for it. Odin is tricky, so we must be careful." Helblindi nodded. "I will take us home once we have to Casket. You may present it to our dam, Helblindi. It's your birthright."

Helblindi nodded. "Who else comes?"

"Just us," said Loki, "and we must keep this secret. Yes, even from Fálki."

"I don't think only of Fálki," protested Helblindi. 

"Yes," said Loki. "Now, won't you cuddle with me some more?"

"No," said Helblindi, "but Býleistr will," he smirked at his youngest brother, who just gave him a forlorn look.

* * *

Three days later, they arrived at the same landmark that Loki and Býleistr always split up on. Fárbauti and Laufey had been ecstatic that all three sons were spending time together again. Ever since Fálki had come into Helblindi's life, Helblindi had been distant from his brothers.

Loki poised himself, taking out the ripping knife and taking a deep breath. At least he didn't have to put on his Æsir skin this time.

"Hurry up," complained Helblindi, "this wind is wretched."

"Let him take his time," said Býleistr, "he'll be more accurate."

That was when Fálki came. Loki broke out of his silent trance, and spat, "what's he doing here? Brother, I told you not to say anything!"

"He didn't tell me anything. I followed. Why are you all just standing here?" asked Fálki.

Loki turned away, and tried to regain his calm. "I must do this right!" he called.

Helblindi whispered to Fálki, "why did you come?"

Fálki said, "your brothers dislike me. I should make effort to change that."

"You are a dullard," Helblindi said affectionately, "this was the worst way."

Loki then leaned forward, and made a very precise rip, a quiet squelch rang through the air.

* * *

All Thor could hear was cheering and shouts from his people, as he smiled upon his family and friends. His cheeks already hurt from smiling, as he walked up to the throne to face his father.

His day of triumph. His name day. The day he awaited his entire life. Thor took a knee, and his father rapped Gungnir on the floor, brining the room to silence. Thor tried not to grin like a child.

 

"Thor, Odinson..." said his father, "my heir... My... Only son." he smiled upon Thor. "So long entrusted with the mighty hammer Mjölnir, forged in the heart of a dying star... its power has no equal as a weapon to destroy, or as a tool to build," Odin paused, "it is a fit companion for a king.

"I have defended Asgard and its innocent across the nine realms, since the time of beginning..." Odin stopped speaking again. Thor smiled at his father, his hand gripping the handle of the hammer.

"Do you swear to guard the nine realms?" Odin called.

Thor said, "I swear."

"Do you swear to preserve the peace?"

"I swear!"

"Do you swear to cast aside all selfish ambition and to pledge yourself only to the good of the realm?"

" _I swear_!"

Odin began, "Then on this day, I, Odin Allfather, proclaim you--" he quieted, and Thor's smile fell. His father said to himself, "Frost Giants."

* * *

Loki was first through the portal, letting the frost from his touch spread over the pillar. The others came through, following Loki's silent lead as the water below them froze solid with a crackle.

The guards walking through the chamber froze, looking around wildly. Helblindi shot a huge gust of ice at one guard, piercing him in the neck and knocking him down. Loki ran ahead as the others fought, reaching the pedestal of the Casket of Ancient Winters.

Oh, it was just as he remembered it. The Casket practically sang to him, his blood reeling. 

The instant his hand touched the Casket, the wall in front of him came apart. A hulking metal thing strutted out--it was at least the size of Býleistr, perhaps bigger. 

Loki docked as it shot fire at him. "We must go, now!" He screamed, puttering through his cloak for the knife as he ran from the metal thing. 

Loki's fingers finally found the knife, ripping through quickly, his thoughts screaming out to him, away, away.

"Come!" Loki screamed, jumping through the portal. But he was too late. His last sight in Asgard's weapons room was Fálki set on fire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first eight hundred words of this were totally my own amusement. Oh, asexual Býleistr. Loki and Bý being horrified by Helblindi's sexual prowess. Loki forcing his brothers to cuddle with him, to their indignation? (They secretly enjoy it).
> 
> I like this chapter.


	11. Of Betrayal and War

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for my horrifying use of ellipsis in this chapter. I am ashamed.

Býleistr saw Loki disappear, but the rip remained open. "Helblindi, we must go!" He shouted, grabbing his brother's arm.

Helblindi was screaming, hysterical as he watched his Fálki burn, the metal beast turning away from Fálki. With a grunt, Býleistr fell back through the portal, pulling Helblindi with him, back to Jötunheimr. Loki sealed up the rip as soon as they appeared, falling on his knees in the snow. 

What a complete failure.

"We could have saved him!" Helblindi screamed at his brothers, angry tears rolling down his face.

"Brother, he was burning, there was nothing we could do," said Býleistr. 

Helblindi thrust a hand at his brother, and Býleistr fell. Loki hid behind his younger brother, not wanting to be an outlet of Helblindi's rage.

"Brother please," said Loki, "calm, calm."

Helblindi sobbed harder, out of breath and afraid. "The last thing I ever said to him... I called him a dullard..." He dissolved into a new wave of tears, pulling on his horns and collapsing.

Loki hesitantly got up, Býleistr watching carefully as Loki kneeled next to the hulking form of his older brother, rubbing a hand slowly on his bed. "Cry it out, cry it out..." he said. He had no comforting words to give. It was all his fault.

Býleistr sat next to Loki, the three brothers out against the wind. "Where are we, Loki?" Býleistr asked as Helblindi began to put himself together.

"We're a few hours walk from Utgard, I think. See that river?"

"Oh, now I know where we are," said Býleistr.

Helblindi stood up, his face pained. "Take me home," he said, falling silent as they began to walk. 

"This is my fault," grieved Loki.

"No, it isn't," said Býleistr. "It was my idea to go to Asgard and steal the Casket on Prince Thor's coronation. It was Fálki's own doing that he is with us."

"I should have done better."

"You did all you could," said Býleistr.

"You had no hand in his death, brother mine," grunted Helblindi, and the sons of Laufey fell silent.

* * *

Thor and his father rushed down to the weapons vault, Thor's stomach curdling as he surveyed the damage.

The two guards had been skewed with ice, and they lay dead on the floor. All the water in the room was frozen, clear Jotun footprints on the snow. Several pillars were frosted over.

Not to mention the Jötunn carcass upon the floor. It stunk something wretched, burnt beyond any recognition and curled in on itself. The first wave of guards in here had extinguished the fire, but left all else for the Allfather's eyes.

The Allfather leaned over the Jötunn corpse, his fingers tracing over the curious raised lines on his forehead. "Son of Ábiörn?" the Allfather said to himself, "or Son of Aöakán?"

Thor still regarded the bodies of the guards. "The Frost Giants must pay for what they have done," he seethed.

"They have," said Odin, "this one with his life. We will find the breech in our defenses and move on."

"I want to understand why," said Thor.

"Asgard has spies across the realms. With time we will gather intelligence--"

Thor interrupted his father, "As king of Asgard--"

Odin shouted, "but you're not king!" Thor became quiet. "Not yet."

Thor turned around from his father, and stalked out of the Weapons Vault. 

* * *

They walked.

The brothers knew that this would be far worse a punishment then a month bound to their rooms.

They both hunched against the bitter winds, wrapping their cloaks around themselves.

The guard at Utgard waved them in, and they walked to the palace and kneeled in front of their dam.

"Where is Fálki?" asked Laufey, "Wasn't he coming with you? And you are so early..."

"Fálki is... Dead," said Loki slowly, looking down at his knees.

"How?" asked Fárbauti, standing up.

"We have not been telling you everything," admitted Loki.

"What did you _do_?" asked Laufey, anger creeping into his voice.

Loki opened his mouth as a shockwave rang through the air, all of the court looking towards the Bifröst site to the North. Laufey stood from his throne. "Loki, you must hide in the tunnels."

"No, my dam, I shall stand by your side," said Loki.

Laufey didn't answer, but all the Jötnar disappeared into the shadows and they waited.

* * *

"Where are they?" asked Fandral, looking around the wasteland of Utgard.

"Hiding," said Thor, "as cowards always do."

The ground of Utgard was a wreck, rubble surrounding small, squat buildings hidden under the cliffs. The horizon was dark, and everything cracked under their feet.

Thor only knew he'd entered a building when the ground turned to stone. "Show yourselves!" he yelled.

He heard someone move... It was none but Laufey. The King of the Jötnar did not wear a crown or hold a staff, but there was something definitively regal about him. "What business do you have here?" he rumbled.

"I want to know how your people got into Asgard." Laufey gave Thor a strange look. Laufey was a good liar, then. 

"There are mysteries not the best of us can explain."

"You crooked old man."

"You know not the horrors of war... I do. Leave now, Odinson, while I still allow it."

"My father saved Midgard from your wrath."

"Your father is a liar and a cheat," Laufey snarled, "and why have you come here? To ask nicely? You lust for battle. Your blood boils."

"Do not say such things of the Allfather!" Thor snarled. 

The other Frost Giants began to step into view, red eyes prickling out of the darkness. Laufey was surrounded by several hulking figures, and they were all stepping out, out of nowhere...

Sif walked up closer to Thor, "think clearly, Thor, we're outnumbered..." One of the figures near Laufey stepped down from the raised dais, towering over Thor and Sif below him.  "Thor. We must leave, now..."

"Go now, Asgardians, while I still allow it," Laufey rumbled, the Frost Giant before Thor stepping closer.

"We accept, Laufey King," spoke Fandral, "we shall make our departure." 

Loki watched the Æsir lambs, the only one still hidden in the darkness. He stepped out, not sure if the Æsir saw him.

Helblindi stood before the Odinson, poised. As the Æsir began to turn away, Helblindi mocked the Odinson, "run home, little princess."

The Æsir froze, and Thor turned around, bashing Loki's brother in the head with his great hammer, Mjölnir. 

Loki gasped as his brother flew back, crashing into the ice columns. Laufey signaled for the attack to begin, Loki running forward himself. His dam held him back, and said, "Býleistr, Loki, take your brother from here."

Býleistr and Loki ran down from the dais, kneeling next to their brother. The Æsir were still occupied, fighting with the Jötnar guards pouring from all cracks to fight them.

"Can you lift him, Bý?" asked Loki, trying to stay out of sight of the Æsir fighting.

"I can drag," Býleistr grunted, pulling Helblindi's arms over his shoulders and pulling him away slowly, ducking into a gap, putting them slightly below the ground.

They could still see out from the gap, but when they knelt down, they could not be seen at all.

Loki ran his fingers over Helblindi's forehead. Helblindi was entirely unconscious and unresponsive, but he could feel the steady beat of his pulse. He rested his fingers softly on his skull, feeling the misshapen mess of bone beneath. He drew his hands away. "This is bad," Loki said. "this is really bad."

Býleistr frowned, but said nothing, only sitting and squeezing his eldest brother's hand, trying to offer some comfort.

Loki stood, watching the battle. "Father is using my pet."

Býleistr didn't laugh. "Can't you be serious for a moment?" he asked.

"The Odinson just killed my pet." 

"You haven't played with Abbé for decades, you oaf!" Býleistr yelled.

"Shhh, something's happening... Someone else is coming..."

"Sometimes I really hate you," Býleistr snapped.

Loki watched as Laufey met the Allfather himself.

"Allfather... You look weary," his dam said.

"We can end this here, and now, Laufey," said the Allfather.

"Your boy longs for war. He did this." 

"My son was not wise... But you said it yourself. These are the actions of a boy... Treat them as such."

Laufey grunted. "Leave."

The light began to build, and the Allfather and the other Æsir disappeared. 

Thor's last sight on Jötunheimr was Laufey's narrowed eyes. He saw that Fandral was greatly injured as the world put itself together again and he found himself in the Bifröst.

"Take him into the healing chambers! Now!" Odin screamed at Volstagg and Hogun, who supported Fandral upon their backs. "And you..."

"I have only done what I think best for Asgard!" Thor yelled.

"You think this is best for Asgard? War, blood, and death?"

"The Jötunns have broken our treaty, and killed Asgardians! Today!"

"You just killed or injured countless of their people... You are vain! Greedy! Cruel!"

"And you are an old man and a fool!"

"I was a fool..." Odin said quietly, stepping closer to Thor. "To think you were ready.  Your actions today, Thor, Odinson, have shown to the people of these nine realms e horrors and desolation of war." He raised his hands. 

"You are unworthy... Of these realms... Unworthy of your powers, of your title... You are unworthy! Of the loved ones you have betrayed.

"I now take from you your power, in the name of my father... And his father before... I, Odin Allfather, declare you banished!"


	12. A Blow to the Head

"Loki! Býleistr! Helblindi!" Laufey called, stalking back towards his throne. "Where are you?"

"We're here!" Loki yelled, standing as tall as he could and waving out from the crevice.

Laufey ran to them, slipping into the cavern, Fárbauti behind him. "Helblindi..." whispered Laufey, his hand caressing over his heir's cheek. "What horrors have you seen today?" He looked upon the scars he remembered carving as if it were yesterday, bloodied and marred by Mjölnir itself. Those scars carved, when Jötunheimr still had a heart. He looked at his younger sons. Loki and Býleistr were crying. "Fárbauti... Find  the healers, they must helped Helblindi. But Loki and Býleistr must speak with me. We will meet in Loki's chambers. Now."

Fárbauti nodded, and slowly lifted Helblindi to take him out of the crevice. Loki and Býleistr followed Laufey out, their heads hung down. They walked up into the castle in silence, and into Loki's rooms. Laufey stood before his sons, and said, "tell me everything."

Loki did. He told him of cutting the Æsir wench's hair, of trips across the realms, of books hidden in his chambers.

"Why didn't you tell us about the Ripping Knife you created? Why didn't you do anything worthwhile with it?" asked Laufey severely.

"A couple I stayed with told me that I give them hope, and that all of Jötunheimr would support whoever pulled them from the dredges. Fálki, who knew nothing but had his suspicions, confirmed this too. I was afraid, my dam, that they'd overthrow you and my sire, and Helblindi too. I couldn't betray you."

Laufey's expression didn't give anything away. "Go on," was all he said.

Loki told Laufey about traveling to Asgard, and finding the book on the Casket in the library. He told his father about how the book said to forge a new Casket, he would have to give up all of his seidr, and a blood relative. Of lying to Býleistr.

"I would have done it, Loki," said Býleistr quietly.

"I know," said Loki, "and that's why I didn't tell you."

"It's a blessing you didn't," said Laufey, ever expressionless. "We knew little of the creation of the Casket, but nobody died making it. The book was a trick... To get you executed."

Loki swallowed hard and continued his story. He told about Býleistr suggesting they steal the Casket, since the Odinson's coronation would be coming. He told Laufey about telling Helblindi his secrets, and leaving with only his brothers. Of having Fálki come along at the last moment. Failing to steal the Casket. Fálki burning.

"You will both be punished," said Laufey, "as you were as instrumental in disrupting the peace between our worlds as the Odinson himself was."

Loki and Býleistr nodded in acceptance.

"Býleistr... I think you could do with a little more learning. You seem to be rash and thoughtless in your actions... You will again study with Angrboda, in his little house, for three years. See what good comes from it." Býleistr withheld a groan. Not Angrboda again, the old hag...

"Loki, you will go with your sire to Asgard to renegotiate the terms of our peace. You will pay the Æsir for any transgressions they desires, in the flesh or in your seidr. The loss of peace does lie on your shoulders. And Helblindi seems to have seen enough sorrow today. Let us go see him now."

* * *

"Hey, Jane, check this out!" Darcy said as Jane poured over her papers. 

Jane rolled her eyes and got to the front of the van. "What on Earth is that?" Jane gasped, seeing the huge aurora in the sky.

"I thought you said it was subtle!" said Erik.

"Go!" Jane yelled, and Darcy stepped on it, driving towards the site.

A storm started to form as they drove closer to the site of the aurora, and Jane laughed as she recorded the event on the thermal camera.

Darcy started to swerve away, and Jane grabbed the wheel. "What are you doing?" she yelled.

"I'm not dying for six college credits!" Darcy argued, pulling the wheel back. 

The two women fought over the wheel, as Erik yelled, "hey!", and the vehicle swerved about wildly. 

That was when they hit a man. Darcy slammed the brakes as Jane yelled, "shit!"

Jane and Erik hopped out, as Darcy said, "I'm pretty sure that was legally your fault!"

"Get the first aide!" Jane said, kneeling over the man. "Do me a favor. Don't be dead. Please." She looked at Erik. "Where did he come from?"

The man came to, getting up on his own and starting to walk around. "Hammer?" he yelled, "Father? Heimdall! Heimdall, open the Bifröst!"

He turned to Darcy, who had her taser, not the first aide kit. "You!" he yelled. "What realm is this? Álfheimr? Vanaheimr?"

Realm? "New Mexico?" said Darcy.

"You mock the Son of Odin?" the man said, walking closer.

Darcy frowned, and then shot the taser, knocking him out. 

Jane gave her a hard look. "What?" said Darcy, "he was freaking me out!"

"Lets just take him to the hospital," said Jane.

* * *

When Thor awoke, he was in a very bright room. He blinked, seeing the face of a thin man appear. "Hi!" he said enthusiastically, "just taking some blood for some tests," he said, holding up a needle.

"How dare you threaten a son of Odin!" Thor yelled, pushing the man off of him and into the wall.

"Hey!" another man shouted as Thor got off his cot, bleary and a little dizzy as he got to his feet.

The other men tried to restrain him, but Thor pushed them off, punching another in the gut. "Sedatives!" someone yelled as more men pushed Thor into the glass.

With a prick of pain, Thor blacked out again.

* * *

Helblindi was still unconscious.

"I can't get used to this," Loki finally sighed, "it's scary."

The healer said, "I can keep him alive, but I can't heal him. Not without healing ice from the Casket."

"What's happened to him?" Býleistr said. 

"The Odinson shattered his skull. If we manage to heal him, I doubt he will be unchanged by his injury," said the healer.

"Oh, Helblindi," said Fárbauti.

"I am sorry, brother," said Loki, "I did this." 

"How many times do I have to tell you you didn't?" Býleistr whispered in Loki's ear.

"I'm still sad about Abbé, too," said Loki. 

Býleistr thwacked his brother on the ear.

* * *

Saying goodbye to Býleistr was the hardest. Loki was close with his youngest brother, after so many years of facilitating chaos together and taking advantage of one another.

Býleistr was not pleased to be going back to Angrboda, who was a snappish and impatient teacher. Worse yet was Angrboda's lifestyle, living in a crumbling house far from Utgard, with only the winters wind, and now Býleistr too, for company.

"I will miss you these three years, brother."

"I only hope the Æsir ask nothing too atrocious of you, brother." 

"I'll be fine. Nothing can shock me anymore," Loki said with a sly smile.

"I trust your judgement in that, Loki," said Býleistr, leaning down to hug his brother.

"We really should cuddle more when you get back. The brotherly bonding really supplements our relationship."

"If I bring you a new ice demon to replace Abbé when I get back, can I get out of it?"

Loki pursed his lips, and watched his brother turn away with his escort to travel to Angrboda's little house.

As his brother shrunk in the distance, Loki began to cry.

* * *

Two evenings of worrying and fretting over his unresponsive brother later, Loki left with his sire. Loki decided after a trip on the Bifröst that his Ripping Knife, while crude, was his preferable mode of travel.

"How was your trip, Fárbauti king?" The Allfather greeted them in the done of the Bifröst. 

"Smooth," said Fárbauti, "but we are exhausted."

"Of course," said the Allfather, "I'm sure the past few days have been as stressful for you as they have been for us. I will escort you back to the palace for the evening. We will send in some food."

They walked down the rainbow bridge. Asgard was indeed stunning from this point, and Loki tried not to let his astonishment show. "And this is your son, Loki?" The Allfather broke the silence.

"Yes, this is Loki," Fárbauti said, and Loki nodded at Odin.

"I have heard much about him," said Odin, "I hear you are talented with your seidr, Loki."

"He is quite the siedrmadr."

"I have little else to practice," said Loki, "I have not had much chance to learn anything but seidr. I have no one to practice fighting with," he smiled.

Fárbauti hushed his son. 

"Perhaps you would like to spar in Asgard," said the Allfather with a nod as they approached his palace.

When they were in their rooms, Fárbauti said to his son, "Loki child, I would advise you hold your tongue in Asgard."

"Oh. I was under the impression my dam wanted me to help in the negotiations," said Loki, as he ran his hand along the clothed furniture. "Nice," he said appreciatively.

Fárbauti rolled his eyes. "I do not think you have done much in the way of helping of late, Loki."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YESSSS! Loki finally gets told off.
> 
> Also, when will I learn to not edit on an iPad?


	13. Blood and Bile

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please take note of the new relationship tag, I apologize for not having it up sooner. It begins to come into effect in this chapter.

Within several hours, Loki decided his sire's intention was to make him as entirely miserable as possible through the period of this delegation. Loki was not to leave the rooms without Fárbauti. He was not to speak out of turn--much less ask for anything he wanted. Loki thoroughly detested all of this.

On the new day, Loki trailed Fárbauti to hear him speak with the Allfather. He was forbidden to speak, unless the Allfather asked him a question, and then, only the barest answer.

The Allfather met them in a long council room, and Loki felt awkward sitting at such a long table with so little company. He sat at his sire's side, his sire having had a new chair brought in for him. The table still only reached Fárbauti's shins, and Loki hoped his sire felt just as awkward, or even more awkward than him then. He then banished the thought. It was resentful, cruel, and unhelpful.

First, the pleasantries were exchanged, as pleasant as they could be when one's son had recently attacked another. 

"Fárbauti king, we're honored to have you in Asgard," said the Allfather.

"Allfather. We were most delighted to receive the invitation," Fárbauti said in a calm, neutral voice that didn't sound all that delighted.

"I'm sorry it had to arrive under such grim circumstances," said the Allfather.

"...yes," said Fárbauti.

"Tell me, Fárbauti king, what were the damages?" Odin finally said in a heavy voice, ready to hear what terror his son had wreaked. 

"Three hundred are dead, along with much damage to peasant homes in Utgard... We're hosting about seventy refugees in the palace now. Helblindi lays wounded, he hasn't awaken since the hammer hit his skull."

"The Crown Prince," Odin sighed to himself, as if he was thinking, _of course he would hit that on_ e, and not even finished the job quickly.

"What motivated the attack?" Fárbauti said calmly, moving on from the subject of his eldest as quickly as he could.

"There was an attempt made at the Casket of Ancient Winters on Thor's name day two days past. A dead Jötunn was found in the weapons vault, I believe his scars said he was a Son of Aöakán."

Fálki was the son of Aöalbert. 

Fárbauti expertly feigned surprise. "We had no knowledge of this," he said, "and I would apologize."

The Allfather grunted. "What's done is done," he said in a knowing voice. Loki looked at his lap.

* * *

The Lady Jane Foster was most commendable, Thor thought. She was also being extremely helpful, driving him to reclaim Mjölnir...

"I've never done stuff like this before," Jane said, "have you ever done any thing like this before?"

"Many times. The last time, it did not go in my favor."

"Yeah... I'm just... They took away years of my life, for nothing. I have to get it back," Jane said, anger seeping into her tone.

"This realm and its love of technicalities," said Thor, trying not to snort. It would not be befitting of a Prince of Asgard.

"Realm? Realm?" said Lady Jane, "realm?"

"You think me strange," said Thor, smiling at Jane. She really was beautiful, in a way uncommon in Asgard. She was delicate and lithe, but she was not overly feminine, either. She played right into Thor's desires...

"Yeah, I do."

"Do not fret, young mortal, all will become clear once I reclaim Mjölnir," said Thor.

Jane laughed, to stop herself from crying.

* * *

Odin had many thoughts upon his mind.

Firstly, of course, was the old issue: Odin knew if the Jötnar went too long without their ancient Casket, their would cease to be the Jötnar. Odin was a powerful man, but to determine the fate of an entire race was beyond even he.

Then, of course, the issue of Loki. The boy had been clever enough to realize the book was a false lead, but then he had stolen into the weapons vault of Asgard itself, and nearly managed to steal back the Casket. That had led to the death of Aöakánsson. Who was Aöakánsson? Why had Loki brought him?

Then came Thor, banished to Midgard. Odin knew opportunities to prove ones worth were few and far between in Midgard. The realm seemed obsessed with hiding everything that transpired from the common people. How could Thor prove his worth when Midgard had no fights they wished for Thor to fight? The people of Midgard were strong and independent from each other... How could he prove his honor saving a person from the inferno who did not want to be saved?

Of course, then would be the matter of convince the Jötnar that Thor was redeemed. That they weren't going to be destroyed as soon as Thor graced the throne. Odin couldn't just give them the Casket for nothing... It'd be soft.

Loki. Thor.

How easily that could tie everything up.

Loki could bear a redeemed Thor an heir. A redemption staged by Odin himself. Odin could offer the Jötnar their Casket in return for Loki's hand in marriage to his son. The Jötnar would know that their sly, clever tongued prince would keep his husband from harming the realm... 

He was Allfather. The choice was his to make.

But Loki was well thought to be the favorite of the princes of Jötunheimr.

Would Fárbauti and Laufey bite?

* * *

Jane wasn't quite sure where she was going with this.

Thor was a big, lovable, strange beefcake. He was also a scary, big, lovable, strange, beefcake.

She was terrified when she saw him fighting inside the compound. But her heart broke when she saw him somber face when Erik managed to bail Thor out.

Thor brought Erik back to her little temporary home trashed.

So she led Thor out as soon as Erik was on the bed.

"This is where I go sometimes," she told him, lying down on the lounge chair, "when Erik's lecturing me, or Darcy's just driving me crazy... You can see all the stars out here."

Jane smiled at Thor, who leaned over and said, "I believe I made you a promise."

"Yeah..." Jane said, a little uncertain, but still dying to know.

Thor took her notebook from her messenger bag on her chair, flipping it open to an empty page, and clicking the ball point pen open. Darcy must have thought him that.

Thor began to draw shapes that became planets and said, "my father explained it to me as this... There are nine realms, all connected by the branches of Yggdrasil. Ah, Niflheimr, Muspelheimr, Svartálfheimr, Jötunheimr, Nidavellir, Midgard, here, Álfheimr, Vanaheimr, and Asgard, my home.

"You see it every day," he said, "in your, what is it... Hooble Telescope?"

"Hubble," Jane corrected with a little smile.

"Hubble," said Thor.

"So why have you come?" Jane asked.

"I did a bad thing..." Thor said. "When I was young, Jötunheimr tried to conquer Midgard, and failed. We have crippled them since... And my hotheadedness may have made it so our people will never know any peace again."

"I'm sure there's a way," said Jane, reaching over and taking Thor's hand.

* * *

Loki spent all night throwing up, retching until all that came was vitriolic bile and blood. He cried.

Fárbauti rubbed his sons back, finding the little spot that made Loki's shoulders relax as he finally stopped heaving and began to catch his breath, his full out sobs disappearing and being replaced with little chokes.

"I hate Æsir food, I hate Asgard!" Loki spat.

"Ah but little Loki, you have brought Asgard upon yourself," said Fárbauti, rubbing his son's back. Loki was silent. "But once this punishment is done, we will consider it forgotten. Life will run on, little Loki,"

A strange expression caught on Loki's place, and Fárbauti knew his stomach had turned again, and helped him to the bath tub before he retched again.

It smelled vile.

Oh, Fárbauti's poor tricky son.

* * *

The next day, Odin was glad that Loki was attending the proceedings with his sire.

"Loki is not feeling well," Fárbauti said simply, "he is of sensitive stomach."

"I could send Eir with a remedy," Odin offered.

"No," said Fárbauti, "he will be just fine."

Odin remembered when he'd tried to kill Fárbauti.

Whatever did motivate the Jötnar in that old war?

They sat down, and Odin told Fárbauti, "I have a proposal to resolve the fight between our realms."

"Oh? Continue," said Fárbauti.

"Even without my son's damage, your realm is deteriorating without its winter heart." Fárbauti gave Odin tired eyes. "For Loki's hand in marriage, Asgard would return to Jötunheimr the Casket of Ancient Winters."

"You already have a wife," said Fárbauti in a strange voice.

"I meant for his hand to my son."

"Ah," said Fárbauti, sitting back and contemplating. After a moment, he said, "what of your son's dishonor and banishment?"

"The marriage would not proceed until his banishment is over, and his honor restored," Odin told Fárbauti.

"I will take this matter home to my king, Allfather," said Fárbauti, "this evening. Have Heimdall watch, good Allfather. We will give you our answer at sunset on the morrow."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the longer wait this time! High school's back in swing (ewww) and my novels were calling me. I hope to have more this week though!
> 
> Also, I wanted to mention that I'm very thankful for the feedback lately. I love talking to you all.


	14. Arrangements

"So what you're telling me, Coulson, is that a big guy comes in here, tears through all your defenses, tries to get the hammer, fails, you detain him, can't get him to talk, and then a friend of his showed up with falsified data and you _let him go_?" Fury said, annoyance creeping further and further into his voice.

"We wanted to see what he would do. We have agents tracking him through the town right now, sir," said Coulson, and Barton nodded affirmatively.

Fury looked pissed, but he kept his cool. "So what's going on here now, anyways?"

"The hammer is still misbehaving, and systems aren't coping too well with the energy coming off of it. The energy levels went up when, er, Doctor Donald Blake was here, but not enough for me to attest that his presence caused that."

"Uh huh. Have you gleaned any other valuable information?"

"No sir."

"Alright, Coulson. I'll be with you when Romanoff and I are done riding out Stark's nervous breakdown."

The screen went black, and Clint said, "Fury's just so goddamn amiable. Can't wait to see him again."

* * *

Loki didn't ask questions as they returned home. He raised an eyebrow, but didn't speak. His voice had been scratchy and pained all day, from the retching. 

Fárbauti felt horrible, keeping this news from Loki. The potential for an arranged marriage? Loki would be outraged that they had even considered.

The thing was, it played right into the old plan, the one Fárbauti and Laufey had thought up so many years ago. Give Loki a home, a realm to rule, so he'd be able to grow, and have a family, lead a proper life. This plan would give Loki Asgard, as its future queen, and restore the Casket of Ancient Winters to Jötunheimr. Perfect.

But there was an entirely new set of problems. One meal in Asgard had Loki retching everything in his stomach, and Loki seemed much more affected by the heat of Asgard than Fárbauti. But could his Æsir form solve the problem? Surely Loki had eaten in that form before...

They went back through the Bifröst, and met a party on the short way towards the palace. "We did not expect you back so soon, Fárbauti king," one of the men said.

"Things are happening in Asgard," Fárbauti replied simply.

Loki went to his own rooms to rest upon entering the palace, and Fárbauti met Laufey in theirs.

"What transpired in Asgard?" Laufey asks his consort, after a greeting.

"Odin would like to marry our son to his, in return for the return of the Casket of Ancient Winters," Fárbauti told him.

Laufey seemed conflicted. "The Casket... But Loki, a hostage in Asgard..."

"I am sure he will be allowed to visit home." 

"Until he is a parent..." said Laufey.

"Isn't that what we have always wanted for him?" asked Fárbauti.

"But married to an Asgardian brute who would much sooner maim him than bed him, the very Asgardian brute who's hammer befell my Helblindi, leaving him in a sleeper deeper than death?"

"But with the Casket, we could heal him easily."

"One son for the other?" Laufey said, beginning to pace from his conflict and woe.

Fárbauti said, "but giving a son a full life?"

"At the hand of a dishonored brute, who tried to kill us all not four days past."

"Odin has said the marriage shall not happen until his sons honor is restored."

"The word of the All-liar," Laufey snarled.

"He is as desperate for peace as we."

"When does he expect an answer?" Laufey asked.

"Tomorrow's sunset."

"I will think of it," said Laufey, "I would go visit Helblindi now."

"I shall come with you," said Fárbauti.

They went down the stairs to the healing room where Helblindi lay, his skin too light for his ordinary blue, his unseeing red eyes shut. Fárbauti couldn't help but trace a hand over his son's scars, his many honors...

"I fear there is no more we can do, Laufey king," a healer said.

"Oh?"

"Not without the Casket... If he doesn't wake in a week, we would put a spear in those hands and kill him with honor... There is no worth of a life asleep."

Fárbauti whispered in his consort's ear, "we need the Casket."

Laufey rubbed his forehead with his fingers and shut his eyes tight.

* * *

Laufey and Fárbauti walked to the Bifröst themselves the next day, in silence. Laufey was frowning the entire way. Fárbauti wished to console him, but there was nothing to say. "Heimdall!" Laufey hailed him, "send word to the Allfather that Jötunheimr accepts his proposal."

* * *

Loki's first reaction was to rip off his necklace and to hurl it into the wall, shattering the glass pendant. "I didn't think you were so literal when you said I was to cater to the whims of the Æsir!" he shrieked, pulling on his hair and twisting his face.

"Oh, Loki, we did not plan for this, never," Laufey said. "But the Æsir offered us the Casket, and how could Jötunheimr possibly refuse? As king, I must do what is best for my kingdom, not what is best for me."

Loki screamed. "A stupid, blonde oaf, doesn't know his ass from a pastry my husband? Oh, the indignity!" 

"Loki, I'm sure he is none too pleased himself..."

"Of course! Even lovers my own size find me repulsive!" He shouted, throwing himself backward on the bed, picking up his pillow and screaming into it.

"Loki, you delude yourself," Laufey said in a tone of finality. "You will go to Asgard. You will marry the Odinson. And you will be a cunning, happy Queen of Asgard."

Loki laughed at his dam. "Oh, wake me when it's all over!" he said dramatically.

"Loki, this is your duty to Jötunheimr. For far too long, your sire and I have coddled you, treated you as the favorite of our sons, attempted to conquer a realm for you, lost the heart of Jötunheimr in the end, and continued to grant you your every wish so you would always feel normal and never left out... But when asked to repay all this good fortune you've had, you refuse? Selfish thing, selfish. I thought the reason you started all this trouble was to steal the Casket. Now the Æsir offer it to us kindly," Laufey lectured, a nasty scowl gracing his features.

Loki shrunk into himself and quieted.

"Now, will you be a good, obedient child, and obey?" Laufey asked.

Loki said in the quietest Laufey had ever heard him speak, "yes."

* * *

Thor's heart trembled when the Destroyer came to Puente Antiguo. 

What more had he done wrong? Why did he deserve this? Just when he was starting to think maybe he could carve out a life on this miserable rock...

He tried to help evacuate the citizens, but someone had to stop the Destroyer... Without his hammer, Thor was nothing...

Which was how he found himself on his knees. "Please, whatever I have done," he begged, "I am sorry, from the greatest depths of my heart, but do not hurt these people!" 

Thor faced it with a steady gaze as the Destroyer hurled him back. And Jane watched as Thor died.

"No!" she shrieked, running up to Thor and cradling him.

"Jane! Get away!" Erik said, pulling on her arm, and turning her to see the projectile, flying through the air, coming for them...

"No!" Jane screamed, throwing herself over Thor, but Selvig dragged her away as the projectile made impact, and Thor caught it.

It was a transformation. His cotton shirt and jeans turned to metal and battle armor, his entire demeanor just seemed so much brighter, and the hammer he held in his hands with such confidence, as he struck the Destroyer down, and bashed it into the dust.

"Hey, you!" One of the black suited asses who had stolen Jane's equipment yelled.

"You are here to protect this city, as am I," said Thor, "and that makes us allies. Yet I must go now, and learn how I have upset my father."

He pulled Jane to himself, twirling the battle hammer into the air and taking them off the ground. "We still need to debrief you!" the man in black screamed as Jane laughed.

They touched down moments later in the middle of the desert, amidst the debris of the destruction the Destroyer must have wreaked when it first arrived.

"I must go now, Jane, and see my father, to know the meeting of this, if I can," said Thor, "but I swear to it, I will remember you, and I will come back for you." He reached for her hand, and kissed it softly. "Deal?"

Jane pulled him in for a kiss, and it was stunning, as her body move against his and Thor swore every bit of his body tingled with something new, something good. As they broke apart for breath, Jane whispered, "deal."

Thor hailed Heimdall, and Jane watched his disappear in a kaleidoscope of color and light. And then she waited for the men in black. They would have hell for her to pay.


	15. A Botched Redemption

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally.

Thor met his father on the Bifröst. "Why has the Destroyer come to Midgard? What has happened here?" he demanded.

"Your honor had to be restored," said Odin, "and it was. You protected innocent lives, when you yourself had no chance."

"You sent the Destroyer?" Thor spat.

"I did, and you have proved yourself worthy," said Odin.

"In the cost of lives, of the homes of the Midgardians? Could you not wait for me to prove myself naturally?"

"No, I could not."

"The Midgardians are there, they are people. You destroyed lives today, father! Shame on you!"

"I never expected you to be that fond of them," Odin said thoughtfully, "I only expected your mercy and protection upon them..."

"I have honor now, father. Explain yourself."

"I have reached an agreement with the Laufey, king of the Jötnar. You needed to be here, your honor restored, to complete it. And quickly, so the Jötnar could not back out."

"What is this deal?"

"In return for the Casket, the Jötnar offer their prince Loki as your wife. Loki is to be kept hostage so they do not misuse the Casket again, and Loki shall be a fine asset to Asgard."

"My _wife_?" Thor roared, "a man?"

"Not a man, a Jötunn, Thor, you know this. They call us the half-things," said Odin with a frustrated sigh as he led his son into the city.

"The same in end... But father, the mortal who showed me the way... I promised I'd come back to her, and be with her?"

"The mortals are like the mayflies, Thor. Why should you take a wife who'll be withered and gone by the end of the century?" asked Odin, as Thor quieted.

* * *

"They'd have me marry a Jötunn," Thor growled to his friends, banging the mug on the wooden tavern table, "in mere days I shall be a bachelor no more!"

"Oh Thor, so terrible a fate," agreed Sif, a hard look in her eyes.

"I heard the Jötnar are good lovers," Fandral slurred, already intoxicated. "Feisty ones!" he exclaimed.

"Thor, as Prince of Asgard, you owe a duty to the country," Hogun said gruffly, having barely touched his drink. 

"Oh, stop sounding like the Allfather, Hogun the Grim!" Volstagg cajoled, "what's his name, Thor?"

"You know, I think I've forgot."

"Is he enormous? How so?" asked Fandral.

"My father says he's a runt... How large that means I do not know," Thor said gruffly, and Volstagg laughed.

"How could you ever bed him? He'd freeze your cock right off!" Fandral teased.

"How could I ever want to?" Thor said, prompting laughter all around.

"And they get the Casket in return for this?" Sif asked, not participating in the merriment.

"It seems," said Thor, taking a drink, "we call the Jötunn prince here as a hostage so they do not act out with it, much like the situation of the Lady Freyja of Vanaheimr."

"Let me say, this is not the fate I expected of you!" a stranger called out, as Thor and the rest of his party were causing quite a stir.

"Not the fate he expected of himself!" Volstagg snorted, prompting even more laughter.

"What reason had any to expect or this! Vile!" Thor shouted.

"Bring our table another round!" Fandral laughed.

* * *

Loki really missed Býleistr. Býleistr would've been able to comfort him. 

He stared at his naked body in the mirror. Dark blue planes of skin, contrasted with shining gold jewelry and blood red eyes.

It was not fair. He was about to throw his life away for good, spend it with a half-thing on a boiling realm.

For a brutish half-thing that would likely sooner beat him then look at him. Not that Loki would be complacent if this were the case. The Asgardian prince had another thing coming if he thought he could whip Loki about like a rag doll.

He ran his fingers over his forehead, feeling the cuts and the lines carved in what would they do for the wedding scars? Would Loki have the scars of Bestla, Odin's dam, carved into his head as The House of Odin would not have a set of scars for Loki? Would the Æsir stomach a scarring ceremony as part of the wedding? Would it have to be private? Would Loki have mate scars at all?

So many questions. Loki set back to packing his things. All of his books and pretty knives, his jewelry and furs. 

Would he have to live a life in an Æsir skin? He could not wear his normal Æsir skin either. That wench from all that time ago that trailed Thor like a pup would remember Loki, for shearing her hair. Keeping up an Æsir skin that was not the original would be far more draining... But how else could he eat, or function in their damned summer?

He looked up from the bag he was staring at when his sire cleared his throat.

"Hello," Loki said with a thin, clearly faked smile.

"Hello, Loki," said Fárbauti, sitting on the bed that'd always been so oversized for Loki. Loki trailed away from the bag on the table, sitting with his sire, who pulled him into his lap and stroked Loki's hair like he used to when Loki was child. Loki relaxed into the touch. "I wanted to talk to you about what will happen tomorrow," said Fárbauti.

"Then tell me," said Loki.

"I'll depart with you in the morning. We'll go to Asgard, and we'll be steered into a room where I will help you prepare for the wedding that will take place in the evening," said Fárbauti, Loki leaning on his arm.

"Will I be able to wear our traditional dress?" asked Loki.

"I don't know," admitted Fárbauti. "We will find out when we arrive. The Æsir may leave ceremonial armor for you, or even a dress. If we find neither, you will wear traditional attire of Jötunheimr."

"What about my scars?" asked Loki. 

"Thor will give them to you immediately after exchanging your Asgardian vows. I will assist him. They will be Bestla's house's scars."

"Okay," said Loki.

"After that, Odin shall host a feast in the marriage's honor. You and Thor will then retire, and the marriage shall be consummated. In the morning you and I will say our farewells, and I shall return home with the Casket."

"Okay," Loki said again, his voice raw.

"It will be alright," said Fárbauti. "You will learn to be one of them... And you can have a family with Thor."

"If he'll have any interest in family," said Loki.

"And your brother will he healed. As will Jötunheimr. When you visit, the realm will be happy again. Like when you were a child."

"That was a long time ago," Loki said mildy.

"I'm sure you will carve out a life there, Loki, if you give it a chance," said Fárbauti, his own voice getting choked, "and your dam and I will miss you."

* * *

"And how did the story end, Ms. Foster?" said Coulson, sitting on the conference table across from her.

"He said he'd come back for me. And the Einstein-Rosen Bridge opened, and he was just... Gone," said Jane.

"Uh huh... Thank you, Ms. Foster," said Coulson, waving her off, "you're free to go, for now."

"Thank you, Agent Coulson," said Jane, getting out of her seat and walking out of the room. The moment she was gone, Phil let out a heavy sigh.

Clint walked in, sitting down in the seat Jane had previously occupied. "So, how'd it go, boss?" he asked. 

"I think this is the biggest mess of my career. And I work with Stark on a regular basis." Clint snorted at Phil.

"I guess extraterrestrial contact is the one thing that can beat that douche," said Clint, "E.T. was buffer than I expected though. Do you think he'll ever come back?"

"He told Foster he was coming back for her," said Phil, "but who knows what will happen when he gets back to Asgard? For all we know he says that to every girl, and he might go find another at home."

"Possible," Clint said, "Do you want to go grab some food? You need to get out of this stupid little compound."

"Sure," said Phil, and the two got up and exited the room.

* * *

"How am I going to tell Jane that I'm married now?" Thor asked Sif, leaning back in the couch.

"You knew her for three days," Sif said in a very even tone, sitting with Thor, but looking away from him.

"She changed me," said Thor, "and I'm about to marry someone I've never even met."

"You know, I always thought that it'd be you and me," said Sif.

"Really?" asked Thor, surprised. He looked at her as she kept her gaze firmly locked on the wall.

"I don't know. I suppose it just made sense, for awhile. I stopped expecting it after my... Hair," she said, "but I think I had always been more in love with the idea of being in love with you, than actually in love with you."

"I never thought of it," Thor answered her honestly.

"My mother encouraged it, I think. Especially when I was very young, when we were children together. She stopped after my hair though," said Sif, finally looking at Thor, "I think you should move on from Jane. I think Loki will need your support."

"Loki?" asked Thor.

"Your bride."

"Oh."

 


	16. All Irregular

Loki and Fárbauti had been escorted into a tiny room. Off through one door was a bathing chamber. The other door led to the hallway, and the Æsir had locked it behind them when they arrived. 

His sire was crouched over in this tiny shoebox of a room, and Loki wondered if that was on purpose.

They'd looked in the bureau on the wall first, and found a dress. After sighing in disgust, Loki had closed the doors of the bureau and went into the bathing chambers instead. His sire couldn't even fit through that door.

He'd turned the knob marked "cold" as far as it would turn, but the water had still been far to hot for Loki to draw a bath.

He sighed, and went back to the first room. "The water is too hot," he said.

Fárbauti was thin-lipped. "Perhaps the Æsir should have taken that into consideration. But we should work on your hair, so we can get a veil on you."

"Aright," said Loki, pulling a chunk of plaited hair in front of him, and began to work on taking out the braids, and the gold beads and chains he'd long ago weaves into his dark locks.

The process took an hour by the Æsir clock.

Afterwards, his hair fell down and loose around him, straight and soft. He gave his sire a sad look, but he stepped out of the loincloth he'd put on that morning in Jötunheimr and slipped the dress the Æsir left behind over his shoulders.

It hung off his lean shape awkwardly, obviously meant for a woman's curves. Loki could take a hint.

He concentrated his efforts, and shifted. She filled out like an Æsir woman, her shoulders broadening with her hips, her chest expanding. Her skin turned milky white, and she picked up a hand mirror left on top of the bureau and looked at her face.the same green eyes she always had as an Æsir, but her features were different. Not recognizable.

* * *

His father tore Thor away after he'd been bathed for seemingly the umpteenth time that day.

They sat awkwardly across from each other, neither looking... Pleased, with the situation.

"Thor, there is one thing I need prepare you for," said Odin, "you know Frost Giants give ceremonial scars?" 

"Of course," said Thor.

"Well, Laufey has asked that Loki be scarred at the wedding, as it is one of their few traditions for a lifetime match. You have to do it."

"What?"

"I have the design here," Odin said, pulling out a carefully inked piece of paper. "It was my mother's birth lines. They indicate the house she was born into."

"My grandmother was a Jötunn?" asked Thor.

"My father, Bor, never married her. It was a short affair... Relations with the Jötnar were easier then. Laufey sent me this scar map yesterday in a letter when he made the request."

Thor looked at the paper closer, looking at the intricate design. A central curve, with several interconnected branches coming off, finally curving into rain drop shaped spots. It was beautiful, but so intricate...

"I can't carve this," Thor said, "not into a Jötunns rough skin." Sure, Thor was a brilliant knifesman, but this kind of craftsmanship was beyond him. Especially in a Jötunn.

"Fárbauti will guide you," said Odin.

"Will Loki scream?" asked Thor.

"The Jötnar having numbing ice for this procedure from the Casket. We will bring out the Casket under heavy guard during the wedding, so Fárbauti can summon the numbing ice, so Loki will not feel the pain. His hands will guide you," said Odin.

 Thor's stomach turned. "This mutilation will be public?"

"It is their tradition," said Odin.

Thor wondered how much his people would love the Jötunn blood splashed across the floor during the wedding.

* * *

Loki looked at her sire once more, staring at the doors before her. She held out her hand, and Fárbauti took it gently. She pursed her lips, and let the doors open for them.

The Æsir on this side of the room, desperate for the first glimpses of the future queen, went quiet as Loki and her sire walked up the room towards the raised podium in the middle. She kept her head raised high and a smile on her face, and the two took their place on the podium, the Allfather giving them a long look. 

The doors on the side of the room opposite that Loki had come opened, and Thor strode in with his da-mother. The Asgardians burst into applause and screaming for their Prince and Queen, who were all large smiles and laughter as they walked up.

Thor gave Loki a good look, surprised to find a woman before them, not a blue monster. Her features were sharp, but she was not displeasing to the eye.

Loki waited through the ceremony. The Allfather's words seemed archaic and nonsensical, about love and fellowship in times of war and peace. What love would be in a marriage such as this?

She let go of her sire's hand, and let the Allfather tie she and Thor's arms together at the elbow, the Queen poured two glasses of wine. She handed one to Thor, and then to Loki, to who she whispered, "you need only take a sip."

Loki took a sip, and was glad for her advice, this wine was vile. Thor drained his glass and held up their conjoined arms, pulling Loki's into the air.

"We will now commence the scarring," said the Allfather in an authoritative voice, and the people of Asgard quieted. The ribbon was undone, and Thor watched as Loki's body contorted in strange noises as organs must have rearranged, and Thor took a glance upon his real bride. Dark blue with large red eyes, some piercing in his ears and eyebrows, long black hair cascading past his hips.

Loki kneeled before him, and a group of guards brought out the Casket, as if daring Fárbauti to try something. He did nothing.

Fárbauti handed Thor a set of knives, of kind Thor had never seen. He felt like a child handling them, as Fárbauti silently called forth the ice from the Casket, coating his large hands. Thor watched as Fárbauti rubbed the hands over Loki's forehead, which was marked by a large scar wrapping around atop his eyebrows, with lines diverging above his nose and curving to meet again at his hairline. Those lines did not look like scars like the others on his face and arms did, the one on his shoulder where the dress had fell loose. Those were natural.

Loki let out a quiet, short, sigh, and Fárbauti took his hands away, the ice gone. It did not melt, it simply disappeared. "Stand before him, Prince," Fárbauti rumbled to Thor in a low, steady voice, "he trusts you."

Thor struggled to remember the pattern on the sheet of paper as Fárbauti placed his hands on the right side of Loki's head. 

The large knives felt foreign in Thor's hands. Fárbauti grasped around Thor's fists, his touch could but not freezing, and shifted the knives in Thor's grasp, before pulling forcefully on Thor's hand with quiet skill. 

Thor looked at the wide, shallow cut they had made and swallowed. This did not seem like a good way to start a marriage. Blood welled out of laceration, and began to drip off Loki's forehead as it made a path down. Loki made not a sound, his eyes closed and his face expressionless.

Fárbauti's hands guided Thor, making more cuts down and out from the large original, smaller now though. Their hands turned red with blood as they worked from careful angles, and the picture began to take hold.

Thor's stomach turned has Fárbauti led him towards Loki's face, finally flipping the knife out near the corner of his eye, forming one of the seven raindrops. 

Finished. Fárbauti's strong hands took the tools from Thor's, to his relief. The knives disappeared into Fárbauti's clothes, and he clasped his hands together, turning to the Allfather. "Jötunheimr recognizes the pair as bonded now," he said, his sons blood dripping from his wrists. "We will join your feast in an hour."

"Thank you," said the Allfather.

Fárbauti and his son stood to depart, linking hands as they had before. Loki smiled as they descended back through the crowds to the door.

"Take us to your healing rooms," Fárbauti said to the guard who stood by the door. The guard, looking at the bloodstained Jötnar before him nodded immediately, leading them down a flight of stairs.

The went through a high archway into a room full of cots. Fárbauti waved off some Asgardian women who flocked towards them.

Loki sat down on a cot, finally touching his new wounds, and he smiled. "I must say," he said, "it is a lovely design."

"If only you could show it off more," muttered Fárbauti, kneeling at the cot and taking a wash cloth from a box underneath and rubbing it on Loki's forehead, before pressing down hard. 

The sensation was still numbed away, and was fairly present. "I wish we had the numbing ice for the others," Loki joked, but his sire was silent. 

The bleeding finally began to stop, and Fárbauti washed away the rest of the blood with the dampened wash clothes the healers handed him.

"There," he said.

Loki smiled, and turned back into a woman, half her dress red.

 


	17. Fárbauti's Farewell

Loki and Fárbauti entered the banquet hall and everything quieted. It was not easy to miss a woman in a bloodstained dress and her thirteen foot companion. 

Loki walked up the table and took her seat next to Thor, and she seemed perplexed by what was before her. "Would you like some bread?" Thor asked her, picking up the loaf and knife.

"I know what bread is," she snapped.

Loki was afraid of this food. Foreign food had never bothered her before her last visit, but she was still apprehensive. Fárbauti noticed her discomfort, and her sire gave her some bits of dried food from the pouch he carried with him, before just handing Loki the entire sack, which she poured on her empty plate.

"I met no offense," Thor said, wincing at his late response.

"I shouldn't have been rude, I apologize," Loki said, and the words sounded like they didn't quite belong in her mouth.

Fárbauti watched the exchange with heavy eyes.

"Would you like some wine, Loki?" asked Thor, leaning to regard Loki's parent from a better angle. His face was blank, and Thor had never been good at reading people. 

"Just a little." Thor leaned to take the bottle, and heard Volstagg idly teasing Loki for having passed up mead. "Too warm," she had said. Thor poured a bit of wine in the glass, and Loki took what seemed to be a sip and smiled at Thor, but Thor could tell she had not swallowed. She repeated the charade several times more through the rest of the conversation, and Thor noted that the level of the wine never receded.

Thor would have to inquire about this, later, in private. 

Thor felt so very caught and conflicted. Sif was right, this Jötunn child was probably suffering more than he. But neither did Thor want to settle into this match anymore than was necessary. He draped his arm on Loki's shoulder, who stiffened for just a second. She did not push his touch away, but neither did she embrace. After a little while, Thor took his arm away.

Had to act for the public.

Oh, it was so painfully awkward.

Finally, Odin gave the signal and it was time for Thor and Loki to make a show of retiring. Loki, of course, knew the implications. An expression crossed her face for just a moment--disgust.

They linked arms and laughed as they walked out.

Thor took her up to his rooms in silence. She kept her head high and her eyes straight ahead, not even glancing at Thor.

As they entered Thor's bedroom, Thor meant to start a conversation with her. Instead, all he met was the disturbing sound of organs rearranging themselves as skin turned blue.

Thor was caught up short looking at him, for a moment. He expected the wounds to have been bandaged, but instead they were half scanned over, some still oozing a bit of blood. He looked at the lines and grimaced--they were sloppy, compared to ha other fine scars.

"Oh, you do not like this?" Loki asked, "Perhaps I should better suit your tastes?" he morphed into a woman who resembled Sif before her hair had been shorn, but with breasts twice the size. The bloody dress she still wore popped a stitch or two warningly.

"No, please, um, be yourself," said Thor. She raised an eyebrow but said nothing, returning to the Jötunn form.

Loki pulled Thor over to the bed, anxious to get it over. Thor stumbled awkwardly to sit on the mattress, and began to disassemble his ornate armor awkwardly. Loki helped him a little, getting the latch that was being difficult so he could take off the chest plate.

Thor reached forward to touch Loki's bared shoulder. Strangely, the fine line that spiraled over fascinated him, instead of sending him reeling into revulsion over such acts. It was a sick culture, but interesting.

Once Thor was out of most of his clothes, Loki untied the bodice of the dress he wore and let it fall off of him, onto the bed, suddenly feeling afraid. It was absurd, he was no virgin, but neither had he ever been breached in this body of his... His real one.

His skin was cool to Thor's touch, but not unpleasantly, as Fárbauti's had been before, what felt like a lifetime ago. Thor crawled atop Loki who lounged on the pillows, his expressions carefully cleared in a way Thor started to wonder if he was already beginning to know. Thor took off his breeches, rolling his thumb on Loki's shoulder again, who looked at him expectantly. 

He trailed a hand down Loki's stomach, moving down with it. The contours of Loki's body were familiar but they weren't, similar things in similar places but not quite the same. 

Loki reached down and curled his fingers in Thor's long hair, and wondered what Thor thought of his own. He spread his legs for Thor, swallowing as he felt those rough, warrior fingers ghost over his cunt.

He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply.

* * *

Fárbauti let himself into the room early in the morning. Loki roused at the noise, but Thor was undisturbed. Thor lay across the entire bed naked. Fárbauti noticed Loki carefully lift a bit of blanket and cover Thor's buttocks with it. Loki had never been disturbed by nudity before.

His son was so stuffed with guilt, but Fárbauti knew it would break soon. Hopefully Loki would be able to ease his volatile personality to Asgard. That was the wild card.

Fárbauti watched Loki stretched and rub the sleep out of his eyes. Was the Æsir prince being guilted too, or had he truly changed? They were desperate though.

"Good morning, Loki. I trust your evening was eventful," said Fárbauti.

Loki nodded. "Off to get the Casket and save Jötunheimr?"

"I planned to say goodbye first."

His son uncovered himself from the blankets, and got off the bed, walking to his sire, giving him a hug. Tears prickled his eyes.

Loki felt his father wipe the tears away with a large finger. "You will write us," he said, and was met with a nod. He smiled. "And you will be good." Another nod, that one likely a lie.

"Helblindi and Laufey will likely try to visit once Helblindi has recovered. We have already reached an agreement for you to come to Jötunheimr for the hottest month of the Asgardian summer."

Loki nodded, and said with a choked voice. "I will miss you."

"You have no idea how much we will miss you," said Fárbauti, pushing away a strand of his hair. "But know we will love you."

"And I love you as well," Loki said, taking in a heavy shuddering breath.

Fárbauti rubbed his forehead, and whispered, "goodbye."

Loki couldn't get the word out as he watched his father depart.

"I am sorry." Thor said after a moment.

"How much did you hear?" Loki asked, his voice to pained to hide any of his emotion.

"Only the end," Thor said in a voice that Loki could only interpret as pure pity. He did not want any pity.

But he was too far gone to give anymore protest than a light, "Oh."

Loki lay back down on the bed, letting Thor's hands wander his body again. Thor was absurdly interested in his scars, for one with not an inkling of understand of them. Loki let his fingers curl in Thor's hair again, which was soft and free of tangles. He wanted to scream and shout and slap Thor's hands away, but he owed his people a duty. Besides, he never had minded being lavished some attention.

"What does this mean?" Thor asked, his fingers tracing over a system of a curling scars on Loki's left shoulder. Loki looked down at the system and took a moment to recollect his thoughts on it, to figure out how to phrase it.

"Býleistr, my little brother, gave them to me and I too him," Loki said, remembering the ceremony with a tiny smile. "They speak of brotherhood, and loyalty. We gave them as a vow to always protect each other."

"He is very skilled with the... Ah..."

"The cuts?"

"Yes, the cuts."

"He always had steady hands," Loki said, "have you any siblings hidden away?"

"None I was raised with," said Thor, "but the Warriors Three and Lady Sif might as well be." 

Loki's expression thinned a bit, "I'm sure they'll follow you across the realms."

Thor went quiet, and after a little while, they both got off the bed. Thor helped Loki dress in clothes in a bureau, now clothes for a man. Loki did not shift into an Æsir form, but kept his own form, his new healing scars and all.

Thor had to excuse himself to the washroom when Loki called forth an ice knife to tend the cuts so they would heal in the correct manner.

Thor led Loki to breakfast, their arms hooked but an agreeable distance apart.

Loki did not eat at breakfast.


	18. Get Suave Loki

Even with the wedding over, Odin still had a lot to grow through. He too, watched Loki at meals, having known of his illness the visit before. He was planning to summon Thor to speak of it when the Spymaster requested a meeting with him.

"Rise, Spymaster Gibbon," Odin responded when the man gave a short bow. He was unremarkable in looks, of average height and muscle, but Odin knew he capable of so much more. "I suppose you have something to tell me?" Odin asked.

Gibbon cracked his neck once, and then said, "we have a deflection."

"What spy, and to who did they deflect to?" Odin asked, suddenly a lot more concerned.

"Amora the Enchantress sir, she's left without a trace. She was supposed to report with me yesterday evening, but she did not. We have lead a search for her, and found nothing."

Amora... Odin had tried for so very long to keep her under his thumb. She was smart, magical, power hungry, and dangerous.

And now she had left Asgard.

* * *

It was getting rather hard for Loki to ignore the emptiness in his stomach.

Loki wasn't quite sure how long he could manage in Asgard without eating. In Jötunheimr, it was nearly indefinite, thanks to his magic. But in Asgard he was putting a large chunk of his magic into keeping his body running at the correct temperature in the warm climate, and he wasn't sure how long he could magically sustain himself.

Naturally sustaining himself, he wasn't sure either. Maybe a couple of weeks. While Loki had never starved, he'd never been given more than he needed, either. Extra food never even made it to his plate, it went out to the villages, where someone needed it much more than the princes.

After a few days, Thor came to Loki in a private library in the castle. Loki was sitting at a table, a couple of books littered around him. As a consort of the Prince of Asgard, Loki had a lot more books available to him, even more than there were in Jötunheimr when he was very young, before Odin had set all of Jötunheimr's tomes alike.

Loki was writing a letter, his runes tiny and concise, unlike Thor's which were easily misread, even though they were rather large, because they were so sloppy. For someone so good with handling weapons, Thor had terrible handwriting.

"Loki, I need to talk to you," said Thor. Although he did not particularly like Loki, he had to admit that Loki was clever, and that Loki's predicament was rather worse than Thor's, and thus Thor had decided that Loki need not see his anger over the match.

"Oh, what now? All you ever do here is talk, talk, talk," said Loki with a sigh, throwing his quill aside and moving the letter he was writing out of Thor's view, "you remind me of Fálki in that," and then Loki became quiet.

"Loki, you need to eat something. Mother informed me that when you came here before with your sire, our food made you ill in this form. Could you try eating in another form, one that you are comfortable with?" Thor pleaded.

Loki rubbed at some of the scars on his forehead. His fingers kept away from the side that Thor had carved, and he only rubbed at the neat, precise marks that Loki had informed Thor claimed that he was a son of Laufey king and the Mighty Fárbauti. The scars Fárbauti had aided Thor in giving the Jötunn runt were on the other side, imprecise and messy compared to the others. Loki had said that all scars looked like that while healing, but Thor wasn't sure whether to believe him yet. The cuts were still only scabbing, and looking at them disturbed Thor still. 

Loki had taken to parting his hair down the middle, partially obstructing the view of the new scars, simply because it only served to make Asgardians more uncomfortable around him. He disliked Asgard, and her people, but he disliked loneliness a bit more.

"I don't like being in other forms much," said Loki, even though the excuse was pathetic.

"My father doesn't like writing to Frost Giant kings to tell them that their favorite sons have died from his negligence in his care," countered Thor, who had begun to seem more intelligent with each passing word to Loki. Loki suspected Thor's little thing with acting stupid was only a cover that worked very well.

"Leave me," Loki said simply, "my brothers woken up and I want him to have a letter from me once he finally figures out how to uncross his eyes."

Thor let Loki be then, hoping Loki would try something. He did seem to be affected by his hunger, growing snappish and sluggish around Thor. 

* * *

What Loki hated to admit was that Thor was right, he needed to eat with a different stomach, one that could handle all the different starches and the cooked meat Asgardians liked.

He stared at himself in the mirror in Thor's room. Thor had gone off and Loki had finished writing his letter. Helblindi really had woken up according to a letter from Laufey, but he was rather confused and had a hard time concentrating on anything without acquiring a massive headache. Still, the Casket had saved Helblindi, for which Loki was grateful.

Loki could not appear again as a woman in Asgard. After having a firm speaking with Frigga, who had been appropriately apologetic, he had made it clear that he was masculine (of course, there were Frost Giants who preferred to think of themselves as feminine, but they were not talked about much) Appearing in a female form was not how a man could gain respect in Asgard.

Neither could Loki create a new male Asgardian disguise. Well, he could, but it would be far too much effort to bring it out every day to eat.

The girl Sif had been as kind to him as a girl blatantly in love with Thor could be to Thor's husband. 

But Loki remembered her. All those years ago, in that tavern. High on luck and gambling, Loki had slept with a very drunk Thor and had shorn off the hair of Thor's not drunk companion while she slept. He'd used a spell with the hair, turning what he had black, and, it seemed, turning the stuff on the head of the girl black as well. Back then, he thought he'd never need see her again, and definitely not in that form.

And she would recognize him, if he showed himself in that form.

Oh, but he was so hungry.

Loki slowly transformed himself into his form of a male Asgardian, his hair shortening, his skin smoothing and paling. He stepped out of his loincloth, which looked positively silly on his Asgardian body, and pulled on some Asgardian (male) clothes that Frigga had had fitted for him as quickly as she could in apology.

Loki swallowed, and walked to the banquet hall. Hopefully he'd have some bites of bread before Sif pounced.

As he entered, all looked at him. He must have seemed a stranger at first, but most seemed to make the connection between his hair and his face quickly enough, losing attention. He sat down next to Thor and took a bit of bread to nibble on and Sif said, "may I speak with you?"

Oh, she wasn't going to be making a scene. Thank the Norns.

"Loki only just got here-" protested Thor, but a dark look from Sif shut him up quick enough, and stuffing the rest of the bread in his mouth and swallowing quickly enough for it to be unpleasant, Loki let Sif lead him into a side room.

"You're the bastard," she said. Her words were cold, but they weren't loud, or uncontrolled. Her rage was perfectly barricaded.

"I am," Loki said.

"So that's why you didn't eat any sooner," said Sif, "Thor's been muttering about a vengeful Laufey on his heels all day."

Loki worked very hard not to snigger at the idea.

"So, why?" Sif finally asked.

"Needed it to make my brother's birthday present," said Loki, "gold Asgardian hair is required to make pillows that never freeze, melt, or rip. Turned it black when I was done so the stitching would stay intact."

He kept his voice very steady and whimsical. It was just another lie to Fárbauti about what he'd been doing with Býleistr on their hunt. 

Sif pursed her lips together. "But you weren't in Jötunheimr... It was somewhere else. How did you get there? Were you involved in the vault?" she asked, beginning to regret the question the moment it left her lips.

"The what?" asked Loki.

"Never mind," said Sif. He seemed sincere.

"Can we not tell about this?" Loki asked suavely, "I'm having enough of a time making friends without old bouts of foolishness plaguing me..."

"Fine," said Sif, for she still rather pitied him.

Loki was celebrating inside.

 


	19. The Virulent Jötnar

Steve did not like the 21st century.

For one, the appliances around him everyone regarded as simple were nothing but perplexing to him. Refrigerators were so much easier when you worked them with a huge block of ice and no electricity. Lights were simpler when he had to pull a chain, not when they turned on as he walked into a room like they were expecting him.

For another, it seemed the people of the twenty first century had abandoned all reason to make sense.

The people who'd found him, S.H.I.E.L.D., put him on their payroll even though he didn't really do anything. He went in, and he listened to them talk. They brought him into sparring rooms where he practiced wrestling, and took him to firing ranges where he worked on his aim.

There was a woman named Natasha assigned to help him around, and to speak with him. In a certain way, she reminded him of Peggy, but Steve didn't trust Natasha. She was there when he woke up--she was part of that first awful lie.

Just as he threw a man over and slammed his back into the pads on the floor, Natasha sashayed over to him. The brave guy who wanted to spar with him groaned, but he pulled himself up. Steve figured he'd be fine, it wasn't like he had gone all out on him anyways.

"I need to talk to you for a bit," said Natasha, giving Steve's partner a glance, before looking back at Steve.

"Alright then, lets talk," said Steve.

"I'm transferring," said Natasha.

"Oh," Steve hadn't really known what to expect, but it wasn't really that.

"I just got a new assignment," said Natasha, "in Russia."

"Wow, Russia," said Steve, still not over the fact that the U.S.S.R. was gone.

"It was where I was born," said Natasha with a shrug.

"Wow," said Steve again, "I had no idea."

"My last name is Romanoff," she said with a bit of a playful smile.

"You just... Don't really have any accent."

"Nope, so, Captain, think you can manage around here without me?" She said.

"I'll be okay," Steve promised.

A few days later, he was surprised that he actually missed her presence. They didn't have much camaraderie, but it was the closest thing Steve had to a friend in seventy years.

* * *

Loki detested much about Asgard, but he really loved her library.

He could disappear in it, let the knowledge surrounding him swallow him whole. He spent days reading, until his eyes hurt from the strain and his muscles cramped from retaining the same position in a chair so long.

As his candle burned low and looked ready to go out, Loki glanced around himself. There didn't seem to be anyone else in the library at this hour. It must have closed, and all were too scared of the Jötunn to ask him to move, he supposed.

He shook out his muscles, and stood. As his candle went out, he retraced the familiar path to the door, and out into the warm night, shifting into his Æsir form so the humidity would be more bearable.

His dam and his elder brother were coming to see him tomorrow. Loki could sing.

The walk back to the palace was short, and then to his rooms with Thor. Loki tolerated Thor for the sake of it, to keep the marriage on the right track until he bore Thor a child. After that, Loki wasn't sure.

And Loki had been trying so hard to conceive, luring Thor into bed with him every chance he got. Æsir could breed with Jötunn, it'd happened before. So why wouldn't Thor's seed take root in him, why didn't Loki grow fat with child? It was frustrating.

He made his way into the bed chambers, lying down next to Thor, who was red faced and sleeping lightly. Loki pulled on his shoulders, spurring him away.

He let Thor slip off his things, kiss the healing scars on his forehead. Had him push in, and moaned for Thor. Perhaps this night they would make a child.

Loki snuggled into Thor's chest as they lay together, sweaty and entangled after their copulation, and let himself drift to sleep with thoughts of heirs and seeing his family in the morning.

* * *

Loki met his dam and his brother on the Bifröst bridge, flanked by Thor, who, to his credit, said he wanted to meet the rest of Loki's family. Off the battlefield.

Two huge Frost Giants stepped into Asgard. One of them had a taller, rangy look about him. He was unsteady on his feet, but when Loki came running to him he enveloped him in a huge hug.

Thor remember this Jötunn. He had hit him in the temple with Mjölnir, the dark, angry marks that lingered on that Jötunn's forehead still reminded him of that. "Helblindi, I missed you!" said Loki, "and you too, my dam."

Laufey king smiled at his middle son, and said to Thor, "it is better to meet in times of gladness than in anger."

"Yes," Thor awkwardly agreed.

The two brothers spoke quietly to each other. "There is something different about you," Loki whispered.

Helblindi was quiet for a moment, and then said in a very very quiet voice, "brother... I believe I carry Fálki's child."

Loki gasped. "Oh, brother!"

"I have not told our parents yet. I still hope it is only a false alarm," said Helblindi sadly, a hand ghosting over his stomach before quickly drawing away. "Our father wishes to speak to Odin this afternoon," said Helblindi, "I will tell you more then."

* * *

Loki and Helblindi sat in the parlor room of Thor's quarters, gnawing on some brittle Jötunn bread together. The taste was nearly euphoric for Loki, so long deprived of his own food. His own race.

"So tell me," said Loki, "you're truly pregnant?"

"I'm not sure," said Helblindi, "the red week has stopped for me." Loki nodded. "I feel odd, too... My healer thinks it is my injury, not pregnancy, but I am still afraid."

Loki nodded again sadly as his brothers hand fell to rest on his stomach, which was still flat, but would begin to round out soon if he was truly carrying Fálki's son. The two were quiet for a moment.

"How is Jötunheimr?" he asked. So much more could be conveyed in words instead of letters and notes.

"Better," said Helblindi, smiling now, "the weather is more agreeable. We're rebuilding Utgard again, healing the sick... You can tell that the land is flourishing again."

"Good," says Loki with a nod, "it was worth it." He leans over, letting his hand rest on his brothers stomach, as if he expected to feel the child kick even though it was far too young. "How jealous I am of you," he said, "to have even some semblance of bearing a child."

"You've not conceived?" Asked Helblindi as Loki pulled away.

"I've tried. I've rutted with him like an animal, but it is as if I am barren. Nothing happens," said Loki, looking at his own flat stomach.

"Odd," said Helblindi, "perhaps the Æsir are not as virulent as we?"

"What do you mean?" asked Loki.

"Even in our times of prosper, we have misborn and stillborn children," Helblindi said, "children are hoped to be born healthy... But not expected to."

Loki thought a moment. "I've never read or heard of a misborn of stillborn Æsir," said Loki.

"And if they produced get as easily as we did, then their world would be overrun with drooling brats quick," said Helblindi, "our population is steady because so few make it into adulthood to breed. Æsir almost always survive to adulthood."

"Now it makes sense," Loki mused, "but I am still anxious to get with child... It would solidify the union better. Once I carry Thor's child, it will be harder for him to back out of this marriage and turn on our people," said Loki.

"You must wait then," said Helblindi.

"I'm half convinced I should ask Frigga," said Loki in a dark tone, "I thought conceiving would be easy."

"Not if your _husband_ isn't as fertile as we," snorted Helblindi.

* * *

Laufey was aging, Odin could see.

Not as obviously as Odin himself did, with his whitened hair and his wrinkly skin, but it was evident. His movements were slower and his skin was fading around the edges, graying a bit, his eyes weary and his scars brittle.

"So you want you get to go home to Jötunheimr for the summer in two months?" said Odin questioningly. The Jötnar had been requesting this since the union between their sons had been finalized, but Odin was still nervous of letting Loki to should he never come back.

"Loki cannot stay in your Asgard in the summer," said Laufey, "even in his Æsir form, he cannot stand long bouts of heat, week long bouts."

"What would happen if he did?" asked Odin.

"He'd get sick," said Laufey. "Violently so, with sweating spells that would dehydrate him to the brink of death. His fertility would never recover, either."

Odin thought on it. "It may as well be," he finally said.

"Alright," said Laufey. "He will be at our Bifröst site by noon on the morn of the first day of your summer. If he is not, we will come to Asgard for him."

Odin nodded.

* * *

The morning after Helblindi and Laufey left, Loki woke up in the morning to find he'd begun his bleeding and ruined the bed sheets. He cried.


	20. Bloody Amora

Thor had fallen into a schedule. 

He woke up, and kissed Loki's forehead. Depending on the day Loki would blink his eyes open and smile, or he would slap Thor and curl back into his slumber. Thor would then dress, and eat. He fought in the sparring ring for awhile, and ate again. He'd spar some more, then bathe, and then he would go to the library to visit Loki, who idled his days away studying magic. Thor would usually convince him to come o the hall for supper, and after food and mead were in both their bodies Loki would switch to his Jötnar form and the two would make love on the days that Loki let Thor kiss him in the morning, or they'd fuck on the days Loki slapped him in the morning.

Even on the days that Loki was gentle with Thor and vice versa, the two had difficulty getting along when Thor visited Loki at the library. Their conversation would have long, awkward pauses, or they would fight, too nasty and scathing to be called banter.

On this morning Loki had slapped him, but Thor went to visit him as he usually did. Loki had made one particular table his nest, and the librarians did not dare put the books on this table back on their shelves when Loki left. There were several teetering stacks of magical volumes twenty of thirty books high seated all around Loki, who had one open before him as he scribbled some things out from the book, or added his own notes. 

"What are you doing?" asked Thor, pulling a seat up at the table and watching Loki diligently. Loki looked up from his papers, his mouth set in a bit of a sneer, the skin on his cobalt hands pulled white from his furious grip on the pen.

"Learning," Loki said blankly, looking back at the paper and writing a few things down, before looking back up at Thor with a bit of an irritated look. "I was thinking you would leave," he said, looking back at the paper to scrawl down a few words more.

"We have this exchange every day," said Thor pleasantly, "and I never leave, do I?" He turned the book Loki was looking at towards himself, giving it a look over before Loki snatched it back towards himself so Thor could not read it.

Thor raised his eyebrows, as Loki said, "I really wish you would." He slammed the book shut, drawing a few eyes towards their table from the ones surrounding, but everyone quickly looked away when they saw the irritated Frost Giant and Thor looking naive, "If it's so hard for you to understand," said Loki, "I'm learning."

"What do you need to learn about?" asked Thor, genuinely curious. Everyday, he tried to get Loki to tell him what he was working on, what those huge stacks of paper that Loki left around their quarters even meant.

"Everything," said Loki, his hand ghosting over the embossed cover of the book almost fondly. "There is so much more to learn here..." he said dreamily, and he leaned back to look up to the huge, tall ceilings of the library.

"You didn't have books in Jötunheimr?" Thor asked, surprised. How could Loki be so interested in something he'd never even grown up with? Thor had never even cared for any book, unless it was shoved under his nose with threats of only beets for dinner if he didn't read it.

"We used to," said Loki, "my brothers and I would spend all day reading. We read every book in my dam's library that we could understand, and some that we didn't. He used to import books for us too... So many books." This was more than Loki had ever told Thor.

"Then what happened?" Thor asked. He was old enough to remember a little, days when Asgard didn't strictly like the Jötnar, but didn't really despise them either, when they were just another (if slightly monstrous) race of the Nine Realms.

"We lost a war and they threw all our books into a fire so tall it reached the mountaintops," Loki said in a quick and toneless voice, "I'm sure it would've been quite the spectacle, if my brothers and I weren't locked in a bunker."

"Are you rebuilding a library now?" asked Thor, frowning at Loki, who looked both angry and sad, as though he couldn't decide which he was, but that was only the surface and Thor typically read Loki wrong.

"We are importing some books now that we have the Casket," said Loki, "I discussed it with my dam when he visited. But most of our library was knowledge of the Jötnar... Angrboda, my tutor, had copies of some of the tomes, but his price for them to go back to public use is high."

"How high?" asked Thor. What was too much for a king, even a fallen one?

"My brother Býleistr's hand," said Loki, "the savage bastard."

"Wait, didn't you say once that Býleistr is with Angrboda right now by your fathers command?" said Thor. 

"Yes, he is," Loki said, laughing at Thor's irked expression, "Býleistr can hold his own against the old bat, who still manages to drive him bonkers when he isn't lusting over him. But Angrboda won't live forever," Loki said mildly, "then we'll seize the books."

"So what are you doing then?" Thor asked, eager to get off the topic.

"Our marriage is not much different from that," Loki offered, but he allowed the conversation to move on, and said, "I am writing. Your father has give me permission to look at Æsir magic, translate it so my own people can work it, and send it home."

Thor shifted uncomfortably. "Wow," he said, "that must be quite a task."

"It is not without it's trials," said Loki, sweeping all of his papers into a notebook and snapping it shut. "Now, escort me to sup," he said.

* * *

Amora sat.

She let the serpentine hand caress over her cheek, keeping her eyes focused straight ahead as the Chi'tauri outlined the contours of her jaw, smirking at her.

"And what do you want from a race so lowly as we, Asgardian?" the Chi'tauri asked, his scaly fingers turning into claws, hooking into the once flawless and soft skin.

She remained upright, straight, dignified. She ignored the pain. This creature would not scare her. "Lowly?" she asked, "I offer only respect."

The Chi'tauri chuckled. "You should," it said darkly, removing his claws from her skin, stepping before her to watch her bleed, rivulets of blood dripping on her cheeks. "Without our mercy," it boasted, "you would have been thrice dead already."

"Yes," agreed Amora, "I am at your mercy."

The Chi'tauri scuttled for a moment, retreating back behind the chair she sat in. She could not lift her wrists from its arms if she tried, all she could do from this spot was listen, stare out into the darkness of the universe. And wait.

It could have been moments or years before the Chi'tauri spoke. "And why did you come here," it asked, "with the whole of the Nine lying at Asgard's feet?"

"I came to learn, to offer my services, in exchange for yours," said Amora, the Chi'tauri coming back around to touch her face, it's hands turning back to soft fingers that it ran through the blood on her cheek, where the earlier punctures had begun to slow their bleeding.

It dragged its hand over her face, smearing her blood on her lips. The Enchantress licked it.

"And what makes you think we have any need for your services?" The creature said in its low growl, wiping the blood on its hand on Amora's clothes. She couldn't discern any expression from it anymore, only the low, menacing voice of gravel, the constantly changing and shifting body of it, confusing junctures of metal and scales and flesh that made no sense to her but were completely comprehensible at the same time.

"The Tesseract," said Amora. The creature rumbled. "Once the jewel of Asgard's treasure room... Capable of creating a thousand realities, or to destroy them all... Left behind by Odin on Midgard, when he chased the Frost Giants away."

The Chi'tauri made a noise that may have been a chuckle, it's once again claw like fingers dragging through her hair and fiddling with it. Soft and golden hair. Amora never flinched, as the Chi'tauri said, "and what would you like from us?"

"Only assistance to seize the Tesseract for you... And Midgard with it," Amora said, looking the Chi'tauri straight in the face. A bit of metal shifted down from its neck towards its stomach as she watched.

"And why shouldn't we just take the Tesseract ourselves," said the Chi'tauri, "why assist one as lowly as you?"

"Only I know where it was lost... How to utilize it..." Amora smiled, "you need me."

"And why does an Asgardian want lowly Midgard?" The Chi'tauri said, openly laughing over the barren landscape.

"The Odinson rejected me, and thus did Asgard," said Amora, "if I can't have Asgard, if I can't have the Odinson, I'll take his little protectorate, his pets instead."

"So docile, so cruel..." Muttered the Chi'tauri, and Amora smiled as she felt her wrists freed from the chair as the creature scuttled away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel the need to note that this story does not follow the comics canon. I have never read the comics, (bad fan!) and this story is entirely AU. The Tesseracts capabilities in this verse are my own brain child. Thank you.


	21. Thor and Loki Fall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whatever that update did besides a header, the text editor is now HELL on an iPad! Ugh.

The red week stopped coming. Jötunn pregnancies lasted two years, as did Asgardian ones. Three months without the red week. 

Loki was fairly confident he was pregnant, but still too hesitant to tell Thor. 

They hadn't talked about children, immature as it may be. Thor treated it as some kind of far off possibility, while Loki knew he was more concerned with getting pregnant, and fast, than he should have been.

A letter arrived from Helblindi, saying that he'd had to tell their parents of Fálki's child, as he had begun to show rather conspicuously. They had said he could kill the child or keep it, whatever gave him peace. Helblindi kept it.

Loki wrote to Helblindi saying he thought he may be pregnant, but wasn't sure. His hand ghosted over his still mostly flat belly sometimes, as if he could already feel the child kicking, even though it was impossible.

He presented himself to Thor less, and Thor propositioned him less in return. Perhaps it may have made Thor suspicious, Loki did not know, as the two did not discuss children.

Finally one evening, Loki went to Eir, to ask her to look him over in the way only a healer could.

She subtly examined him and touched his skin, occasionally muttering something to herself, but she finally said to him after casting a few spells and examining him, "I'm not sure, but I'd say in my right mind that the Royal Family of Asgard is expecting."

Loki beamed.

* * *

Erik Selvig stood at the computer screen, reading the data on it with a frown. The Tesseract was steadily outputting far more power than usual, and had begun put out isolated strikes several hours ago that were becoming less isolated and closer together as time marched on.

The base had begun an evacuation about an hour ago, but Erik, his technicians, and a couple other agents stayed, moderating the Tesseract's activity.

Erik flinched as he heard Nick Fury's booming voice, "Dr. Selvig!"

"Mr. Fury," said Erik, turning away from the screen.

"What exactly is the Tesseract doing?" asked Fury.

"Ah, well, I can't say," said Erik, looking back at the little blue cube, wincing as it threw off some sparks and an agent of two backed away. "she is... Misbehaving."

"Can't you shut it off?" asked Fury, giving the device his own look, one that said, _stop your bullshit right now._  


"The Tesseract is a power source," said Erik, "we think. We shut off her machines and she will turn them back on." Fury looked like he was about to say something, and the Tesseract let off a huge flash of light. The air smelled slightly singed, but nothing else happened. "That's new," muttered Erik.

Another flash. Fury squinted. Then another, this one with a huge resounding crack, as the Tesseract starting to distort the air around it, off putting a huge ball of light that swam with it, before the Tesseract let off one huge flash, the largest of them all, and in the place of the light stood a woman, as all the lights visibly dimmed, as did the Tesseract.

"Ma'am, please put down the spear!" Fury yelled.

She gave him a look, and thrust the spear. It made a sound kind of like a pop, and Fury was down.

She said, looking down upon him, "I am Amora, the Enchantress."

Erik started to back away, tripping over a stray wire. The woman looked at him with a large smile, her blonde locks flowing. "You," she said, "look smart."

* * *

They were surprised when a facial recognition program detected Amora in Germany. 

Steve went in to pick her up, eager to have something of substance to do again. He stayed outside of her vision, as she corralled a group of people who'd fled in terror from the party she had crashed onto their knees, laughing.

"This was what I always wanted in Asgard," she said loudly, even if the comment was only to herself, and Steve took that moment to step out of the shadows. "And who's this?" Amora asked with a sneer, "a warrior who can't pick but one color, and chooses three instead?"

"You know, I've got more on my mind than my outfit," Steve said, tanning his ground as Amora came closer, sultry, her green eyes trailing up and down his body.

"Like what?" she asked, stepping right up next to him and putting a hand on his chest as she smiled.

The well rehearsed reply fell from his lips as she tugged on the neckline of his suit pulling him closer and carding fingers through his hair.

At the same time, something very loud, very bright, and very hot collided with the Enchantress's body and sent her flying into the ground. The civilians who hadn't already made a break for it when Steve had distracted Amora were fleeing now, as Tony Stark flew down.

"Don't worry," Tony said in that smug tone, "happens to the best of us."

Tony Stark was exactly what Steve would call the best, but as Aora started to climb back to her feet Steve just said, "I thought you were only doing the research."

"Eh, got boring fast," said Tony, "I like excitement."

Amora sent some kind of ball of magic at them (magic wasn't supposed to be real... Right?) and Steve blocked it with his shield, using it to knock her feet out from under her. 

She landed head first on the pavement, and went out cold. There was a bit of crack, and some bleeding, but they gathered her up and took her back to the Quinjet, strapping her up for the ride.

"That was easier than it should have been," Tony muttered to himself. Steve didn't need him, and only stared at the blonde woman, still unconscious.

* * *

Thor strode into the throne room, Loki struggling to keep pace with his determined stride. The Allfather looked up at his throne.

"Father, I must go and stop Amora. Midgard is under my protectorate now," said Thor. Loki stood back a few paces, trying to fade into the background and only watch the scene.

"You may," said Odin, "Amora must also pay for her crime against Asgard, abandoning her post without warning. She was bound to it."

"Excellent," said Thor, "I will just change my chest plate, and then I will depart--"

He was interrupted by Odin. "One thing."

"What?" asked Thor.

"You will bring Loki," said Odin.

Loki did not protest. Surely he could stay out of the way in Midgard?

Thor deflated, but he did not argue with the Allfather. Loki wondered why. "Yes, I shall," said Thor.

The two left the throne room, and Thor seemed to have forgotten about changing his chest plate as he rushed them both towards the Bifröst. 

"Take us to Midgard," he said.

Heimdall looked at them with his unblinking stare, and Loki shrunk a bit at Thor's side, looking at his feet.

"Of course," said Heimdall after a moment.

Loki but his lip, still trying to get away from Heimdall's eyes as Heimdall started the Bifröst.

* * *

"Whoa!" cried one of the agents at the computer bay in the Helicarrier.

"What?" asked Maria Hil, looking at the energy readings around the screen. Everything looked normal, except for a huge spike that was quickly dying out in New Mexico.

"Those are Bifröst readings," said the Agent, "not even the Tesseract does that."

"As far as we know," muttered Hill, walking away to alert Fury that someone else had arrived.

* * *

"Well," said Loki, "now what? I don't see Amora anywhere here to apprehend." He looked around the dark, arid landscape.

Thor handed him a piece of pink fabric he fished out of his armor. "You find her, I take us there."

"I'm not a dog," Loki said, taking the fabric and analyzing it. "They're east of here," he said.

"I suppose it's good you are here, I would've had to wander and find help," said Thor. "I will fly us, if you will guide."

"Why do I think I'm not going to like this?" muttered Loki, grabbing Thor soundly around the waist. Thor's left arm curled around him, as he twirled Mjölnir and the two began to rise.

Loki was right. The wind and the noise were horrible, and within a short while he knew he was windburned.

He didn't know how much time really passed, only that it passed very slowly as he kept Thor in the right direction.

Night turned to day and they stopped so Thor could rest by the shore, Loki soothing his aching arm with seidr. "We are near," he said, but otherwise they sat in silence until Thor declared he was ready to take to the air again.

"Thor!" Loki shouted not long after taking to the skies, "she is below us!"

"There is nothing below us," said Thor, that was, until something very nearly shot through Loki.  

* * *

"That's Thor!" Coulson yelled at the man who'd just shot at the flying pair, "he's not a hostile!"

* * *

Loki and Thor fell, and it wasn't the water they hit.

It was floor.

 


	22. Aboard the Helicarrier

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really nervous about Tony and Natasha's characterization here, not gonna lie.

Loki landed on his stomach. He screamed not from pain,it from fright. "What's wrong?" Thor grunted, pulling himself up and putting a hand on Loki's side as Loki curled into himself.

" _Please please please_ ," muttered Loki, and Thor was about to ask him something as  footsteps approached. 

"Shit, look at that dent," someone's voice said.

"Who are you?" Thor bellowed, standing in front of Loki protectively,

"We're not here to threaten you," said one of the pair, "Coulson wants you at the bridge."

"The Son of Coul is here?" Thor said, as Loki got to his feet and put himself together, pushing the armor on his belly down a bit. "Take us to him."

The agents nodded, and led the way in silence. Thor whispered to Loki, "what was wrong?"

"I'll tell you later," Loki said tersely.

They arrived at the bridge, and were greeted by the man Coulson, who Thor seemed to know, and several others.

"Nick Fury," a dark skinned one said, holding out a hand to Loki, who waved it off and looked at Thor.

There were several others collected here, and they were directed to sit around a table. "We have come to collect Amora, and bring her to Asgard," Thor declared.

"Yeah, problem is," said a short man with dark hair, "we want to collect her too."

"None of your mortal prisons could hold an enchantress," chided Loki.

"She's been breaking our laws, and hurting our people. She's ours," said a woman with fiery hair.

"Amora is of Asgard," said Thor, "and she has crimes to answer for there. We are more equipped to bring her punishment."

"How about we stop quibbling over who gets to take her in and focus on stopping her?" Fury said, and the table fell quiet. "What do you know about Amora?"

Thor answered, "she was one of the best spies Asgard had. A very powerful sorceress, perhaps the premiere one in Asgard, aside from Loki... She disappeared several months ago."

"And this is Loki," Fury clarified, looking at him. 

"I am Loki Laufeyjarson," he declared. 

"Alright then, this is Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, Bruce Banner, and Tony Stark," said Fury.

"Eh, pleasure," said Loki. Thor nudged him with his elbow. "She's stolen the Tesseract, yes?" 

"Yes, go on," said Fury.

"I haven't studied it except from books," said Loki, "but the Tesseract alters reality... It makes impossible things happen. That is the function of it. She can use it to fold the universe to connect two points--"

"A wormhole?" interrupted Stark.

Loki ignored him. "or to alter the passing of time. She could use it to make herself immortal, or to make it so something that didn't happen did."

"So we need to get this the hell away from a woman bent on world domination?" Stark said.

"In responsible hands, yes," said Loki, at the same time that Thor said, "to the Allfather, he created it."

"I think I'd rather it destroyed," said Natasha.

"I think that would have unforeseen consequences," drawled Loki.

"We have her in custody, if either of you would like to see her," Fury moved on.

"I'll speak with her," said Loki.

* * *

Fury led him into a room where the enchantress was kept in a round glass cage. "Hello," he said. She didn't even acknowledge him. "Perhaps you'll recognize me like this," said Loki, his Æsir form dripping off him as he moved forward to raise a palm on the glass. 

"You," she said.

"Me," Loki said in a rather pleased tone. "Honestly, enchantress, I don't see why you'd want this wreck. My parents tried to conquer it, and I'm starting to be glad they failed. Squabble squabble squabble, these mortals."

"I'm The Enchantress," said Amora, before saying, "you took Asgard from me, when you married Thor. I'm fit to rule... So I moved on."

"Mmm, I doubt Thor would've chosen to marry you, he dislikes us vitriolic types. But really, I don't see how you're planning to rule from inside a cage," Loki said, looking her over and adjusting a piercing through his eyebrow.

"Don't act as if I'm below your notice," Amora snarled.

"Then start being noticeable." Loki looked over his fingernails.

Amora walked straight up to the edge of the glass, "my agents have some very noticeable plans in motion... How would you like the ground swept out from under your feet, ergi?"

"Not a man," said Loki, "only a Jötunn. Thank you for your cooperation." Amora raged. He took on his Æsir form.

He walked back to bridge. "Amora has agents, she says, that will destroy this... thing," he quipped. 

"Barton," said Romanoff.

"Pardon?" said Loki.

"She has some of our agents under a... Spell," Romanoff clarified.

"I haven't heard of such magic," said Loki.

"What do you mean, Loki?" asked Thor.

"It would seem she has friends outside of the Nine, Thor, who have taught her new magic."

* * *

The moment he could Loki away from the arguing mortals, Thor confronted Loki. "Loki, why were you so upset by a simple fall?" he asked.

Loki bit his lip. "I'm pregnant," he said after a round pause.

"You are?" said Thor, reaching forward to grasp Loki's cheek, "did the fall hurt the child?" 

"I can't be sure..." said Loki, "the child is insubstantial yet, but I don't think I've miscarried..."

"How far along?" asked Thor.

"Eir confirmed my pregnancy a month ago. Four months pregnant," Loki confirmed.

"The mortals have devices to detect a child's heart..." said Thor, "we could ask them to check."

"I doubt they have the equipment on a vehicle such as this," said Loki acidly.

"We could ask," said Thor. And then he hugged Loki. Thor and Loki had been pressed together many a time before in throes of fucking, but they never hugged. As Thor hugged him, (but not to tight, for Thor was conscious of the child) it felt far more intimate and loving than anything they'd done before. And Loki loved it.

When Thor let go, Loki was already craving more of his hugs.

* * *

They got back to the others then, who were examining Amora's spear that they'd taken from her. "So, as our magic expert," Stark asked Loki, "what are you getting from this?"

"It's... Dark," said Loki, unable to describe magic he'd never seen before. "I would think Amora is not the only conduit for this staff." He ran his fingers on it, before drawing them quickly away as if it'd hurt him, "no, I do not like it."

"Not the only conduit," echoed Stark, "yay, more psychopaths to deal with. Moving on, what's up with you and Thor?"

"Tony, is that really important right now?" asked Steve.

Tony ignored him, and said to Loki and Thor, "best friends for life, comrades in arms, brothers?" Loki laughed out loud when Stark said 'brothers'. "Lovers?" asked Stark.

"Aye," said Loki.

"I was kidding," Stark dead panned, looking rather forlorn, "but I guess that works."

"Is this really important?" Steve repeated.

Thor said, "spouses."

Quiet. "Huh, didn't really expect you to be the settled down type from the reports," said Natasha.

"It was an arranged marriage," supplied Loki after a moment, "it's a recent development."

Natasha pulled Thor away as Bruce finally managed to get Tony off of the Asgardians sex life and back onto the staff with Loki, and Natasha said, "Loki. Jane Foster. Explain."

"It is a far complicated matter," said Thor, "my marriage to Loki occurred directly after my banishment was lifted."

"So what are you planning to do about Jane? What happens when Loki finds out? Does he find out?"

"I don't know," said Thor mournfully, "Loki's people could hardly be considered jealous... They are rather promiscuous, of legend at least. But Loki is very jealous and possessive, even if he didn't truly desire this match anymore than I."

"Ouch," said Natasha, "that is a pretty tricky snarl. But you can't avoid the problem. They may be hiding Jane Foster because Amora took Erik Selvig, but she's not going to be hidden forever. And she'll want to see you."

It honestly kind of hurt her inside to see Thor looking so sad and lost, but she also wanted to keep Norse drama to a minimum on Earth.

"I will break it off with her when she comes, discreetly," said Thor, but there was no true promise in his words, "away from Loki's eyes."

"There is something else going on. I can tell," said Natasha.

"Loki has informed me that he has conceived and is carrying my child."

Well, that escalated quickly. "But Loki's a man," said Natasha.

"Loki is a Jötunn," said Thor, "in his true form he is both man and woman, and he holds onto the genitalia in this form."

Natasha had not really wanted to think about genitalia today. Especially not alien genitalia. "Congratulations," she said after a pause, unable to come up with anything constructive.

"He only informed me when he was afraid that the trauma from his fall onto this draft may have caused him to miscarry," said Thor, looking even more stressed out, if it was possible.

"Ouch," said Natasha, "look, once we're off the Helicarrier, I'll convince Dr. Banner to give Loki a check up, okay? He's dealt with pregnant women before."

"Oh, thank you Lady Romanoff!"


	23. Another Blow to the Head

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short chapter, but a chapter.

"So, you and Thor?" said Tony when it was finally just the two of them in the lab playing around with the spear. Loki would trace rune engravings with his fingers and mutter. Sometimes the staff reacted to him, sometimes it did not. Tony was having more fun trying to see what it would do if he took it apart. 

"It is not of choice," said Loki primly. The guy ran hot and cold, one minute he was telling raunchy sexual allegories, the next moment he was acting like a Victorian prude.

"Lay back and think of England deal?" asked Tony.

Loki raised his eyebrow, "I have not heard of such relationship before..."

"Never mind," said Tny, "cultural boundaries. But hey, if you gotta get married to some dude against your will, you got the lucky hand. Thor is a hot piece of ass."

"Eh," said Loki, fiddling with something that emitted a nasty pop. Loki drew back as if he'd been shocked. "Well," said Loki, "I found an essential part."

Tony looked over the knob in the staff. "Yeah, I guess so," he said, reaching forward and tapping it with his plastic pen. "Damn!" Tony shrieked as a huge shock stirred him straight to the bone. "This should not be transmitting electricity," Tony metered to his pen.

"That wasn't electricity," Loki said, "it was magical energy. I've learned the difference shocking myself practicing, and Thor has shocked me way to many times when we've--"

He was interrupted by Tony, "yeah, yeah, I get it." Tony was still tense from the shock, and his heart wouldn't stop beating.

Loki fiddled with it some more, getting shocks from the staff that didn't seem to slow him down at all. Soon the air smelt of burnt ozone as he struggled to get it apart. 

Just as Loki had finally managed to separate two of the plates, everything gave a wild rock and he was thrown to the floor as a loud sound crashed through the air. The plates reconnected as the staff clattered to the floor from the lurch.

Stark put his hand to his ear as Fury screamed through the ear piece, "Stark, I need you out there for an engine repair! Keep Loki protecting the staff!"

Tony said to Loki, "guard the stick, I gotta go. Don't let L'amore get her hands on it."

"I understand," Loki said, and Tony nodded before running out of the room, leaving Loki alone in the laboratory. He suddenly no longer felt secure on this flying machine.

The staff had reconstructed itself in the time that Loki's gaze had shifted from it, leaving Loki right back where he started--staring at where the power center was, no way to get into it.

He picked up the staff and gripped it experimentally, flashes of heat shooting up his arms as he held it with both hands. He gritted his teeth and shifted to his Jötunn form, calling forth the ice, stopping the staff from affecting him immediately.

He wondered if he should go up to the bridge and offer his assistance, and decided not to.

He had been given orders to stay here. 

Not long after, he heard footsteps. Still resolute in his grip, he narrowed his eyes and waited as Amora stepped into the door.

"I still need that," she said, "even though you'd like to... Play with it."

"Where are the mortals?" asked Loki.

"They see me as their Maria Hill, but I have engineered it so as you do not," she says with a wisp of a smile, getting up close to Loki, her hand reaching out to grab the staff.

He took one hand off the staff and snatched her hand, cooling is skin further and further until she started to scream, her skin turning black and cracking. "You bastard!" she screamed, yanking her hand away and kicking the staff out of Loki's hands where it clattered to the floor.

Loki moved to strike her, but she dodged him to quickly. She never hit him though as he threw more punches, but Loki wasn't used to opponents so quick and small as she. She managed a punch into his clothed stomach, but never came near his exposed skin.

She kicked him, and while it did not send him off his feet, the kick to his heels did cause him to lose some balance and she stood still long enough, the split second she needed to summon the staff.

Then she swung the staff with an unexpected ferocity, and it collided with Loki's head with a sickening crack.

* * *

Loki blinked as someone shook his side. It was Natasha.

"Good, you're responding," she said, helping him to his feet. She did not comment about the fact that he was blue. His head pounded, but he didn't sway. "I'm going to take you down to medical. They're even gonna scan for a fetal heartbeat."

Loki nodded and rubbed his forehead, letting her lead him the short way down. The medical bay was stark white, and he complied as they put him onto a cot and Natasha disappeared. He kept his skin warm. They put a metal instrument over his heart, and asked him how his heart was normally supposed to act.

"It's supposed to beat," said Loki, to the healers chagrin.

"The blue?" the same one asked.

"My natural form," Loki said, and he decided not to say anymore.

"This is a fetoscope," said another healer, holding up an instrument, "it's like the stethoscope, but it detects the babies heart beat. We're not sure if it'll work on you though."

Another chimed in, "an ultrasound is better, but we don't have the equipment."

Loki pulled up the small shirt his Jötunn form wore, letting him set one end on his belly and rest his ear on it, listening for a moment. "Well, there's a heartbeat. No idea if its normal for a mutant alien baby, but a heartbeat."

"Good," Loki said faintly, as Fury strode into the room. "Director! Where is Thor?" Loki had snapped to attention immediately at the sight of him.

"He fell off. Stark reported that they're both in New York right now, Amora started her invasion," Fury stated.

"Well then I must be with Thor," Loki said plainly, starting to sit up as the healers tried to push him down, but he cooled his skin a bit and they drew away with little shouts.

"Hell no am I letting a male alien baby mama into battle," said Fury, crossing his arms at Loki and standing his grounds.

Loki narrowed his eyes, "You will let me go to fight with Thor. It is my place," he argued, shifting his body back to his more casual Asgardian form, his armor tucked away in his seidr for when he'd need it.

"As far as we're concerned, a pregnant person's place is safety," Fury said, unimpressed by Loki's display.

"I belong with my spouse. You will not strip me of that dignity," said Loki, hardening his voice further and clenching his fists till they hurt.

"You lost in hand to hand combat with Amora. Are you sure you belong on the battle field?" Fury asked.

"I grew up handling weapons and using magical weaponry. The only problem I had in that room was too little space."

"What makes you want to get out there so bad anyways?" Fury asked, relaxing his shoulders a little. Good. 

"I fight by Thor's side unless I cannot stand," said Loki, "my dam Laufey went into battle with my sire to unify our home when he carried my brothers and I. It is practice."

Fury let down. "Fine. Catch the jet ride down with Romanoff and Barton. They'll meet you at the bridge in five."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They didn't even fix the text editor while I was away.


	24. Blood on the Floor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The battle will seem glazed over, because it is! Everything will be explained to Loki about what he (and us) missed in the next couple chapters.

Loki sat in agitated silence as they fly in to New York. Amora had scattered most of them, Thor, Banner, and Tony have already reached the city, with the captain, Romanoff, Loki, and Barton who still looked tired but otherwise no worse for wear trailing behind.

Nobody quite wanted to speak at all, and in the absence of anything else to do Loki touched his stomach, feeling the great slabs of metal and cloth in between his hand and his flesh, the place where a child grows.

He dropped his hand and swallowed. There is only shame in avoiding battle, and Loki will stand in his proper place, aside his spouse. He is no crying princess, no damsel in distress.

Tony and Thor were at the meeting spot, and as they get off the plane Loki and Thor are given ear pieces, which they quickly have help installing. The captain disappeared, to corral bystanders to safety, and soon Loki and Thor found themselves sucked up into the battle, back to back, Thor swinging Mjölnir and taking heads off the wretched creatures, as Loki sends balls of magic and energy at them that send them flying back further than even Mjölnir.

The captain's voice crackled in through the ear speakers after awhile, saying, "the police are setting up a perimeter now."

"Good," Romanoff responded, and Loki skewers his eyes and listens while punching one of the creatures in the jaw.

"Well, as far as Thor and I can see we're not getting anywhere," snarled Loki, who's even starting to feel a little fatigued from the just endless onslaught. Neither he or Thor have suffered any more than glancing blows, but they can't hold that up forever.

"Loki's right," said Barton, the one who was enchanted before, "we need a plan."

"Has anyone seen the Hulk?" asked the captain.

"Smashing through an office building somewhere, last I saw," said Stark, and Loki can almost hear him shrugging through the damn device.

"Loki," Steve ignored, "I think if there's anyone that can shut down that wormhole, it's you."

"Thanks," Loki sneered, as Thor cracks the metal shell of one of the creatures and dribbles its innards all over the pavement, but Thor still can't figure out how to get the device to relay his speech to the others.

"Loki, you go up there and disguise yourself as Amora so they don't attack you, you can do that, right?" said Steve.

"Yes," said Loki, "I can take on her appearance."

"Thor," said Steve, "how about you get up in the sky and try to bottleneck the invasion force?" he waited a moment, before saying, "Thor?"

"I'll relay the message," said Loki, pretty sure that Thor's earpiece was broken when he was last punched by one of the creatures descending upon the pair.

"Okay, good. I need Natasha on the ground with me, and Clint, stay on the rooftops."

"Got it," and "can do," come over the device at the same time.

"And you, Stark, try to get stuff that's flying."

"Sure," said Stark, way to chipper for the situation.

"Thor," Loki shouted, "they want you to take out as many as you can at the site of the Tesseract-Bifröst, and I am wanted at Stark's apartments!"

Loki has no idea where the real Amora is right then, and only hopes she isn't there. Thor said, "I will take you there!" and then they are flying with that damn hammer again, Thor taking them to Stark's balcony where they stumble to there knees from the uneasy landing. 

Loki got up first and helped Thor to his feet, squeezing his hand tight before quickly pressing his lips to Thor's cheek for a kiss. "Be safe," he said.

"I will be for you," said Thor, pulling Loki in for a kiss on his lips, "and for our child." His hand rested on Loki's belly for a moment, before Thor brings himself back in flight, to the top of the wormhole.

Loki quickly changed his appearance, turning his hair blonde and giving his body the curves of a woman as he tries to straighten out his clothes into what Amora was wearing when he saw her last, her armor is his best guess what to give himself.

Then Loki heard mighty footsteps and a huge roar, and he froze and turned. The green rage monster, where Banner hides somewhere deep inside stares at him, breathing deeply.

"It is only I, Banner," Loki pleaded. "Loki, not the enchantress..."

Banner grunted, and Loki dropped the Amora disguise to the Æsir form of him that Banner should recognize. "Not the enchantress," Loki pleaded again.

But it is not enough. Before Loki can get away, the creature has grabbed him like a toy, flopping him about and smashing him into the floor. Once Loki has made a proper dent, the creature dropped him and snarled, "bad witch," before disappearing.

Loki whimpered, and tried to uncurl his arm, but he couldn't. He moved it up to his ear, gingerly pressing the button, and even though he does not hear the beep, he moans, "Captain? Captain?" and he still somehow felt disappointed when there was no response.

* * *

So he rode a nuke into space and saved the day. All in all, it was a pretty normal day on paper for Tony Stark.

After that, there was another problem. Thor and his slightly creepy wife(?) had dropped off communication long ago, and whilst Thor made his way down to them, Loki was nowhere to be found.

"Loki? Loki?" Steve said into the ear piece, yet again.

Thor, having just gotten down, said, "I left Loki upon Stark's terrace so he could transform in privacy."

Speaking of transformations, the Hulk had shrunken down into a very exhausted (and naked) Bruce Banner, who Steve had hoisted over his shoulder.

"Lets to up to my tower," said Tony, "we'll find him around there somewhere if he never got to the device, I think. And we can get Bruce pants. I think we're all excited to get to that part."

"I am," Bruce mumbled against Captain America's shoulder blades.

They picked their way up to the tower, and got Bruce pants. Then they arrived in Tony's living room, which had the addition of multiple broken windows and a person size dent in the floor that contained an occasionally blue man.

But on this occasion he just lay there rigid straight, except for his arms, both bent at the elbow, one in his hair near his ear (trying to contact them?) and the other laying on his chest with the wrist bent at a rather gruesome angle.

"Loki?" said Thor, getting down on his knees in front of him. 

Loki's eyes glanced toward him immediately, and Loki pushed himself sitting up on his good hand. "Anything broken besides the wrist?" asked Stark.

"Bones, no," said Loki, before he looked down at his crotch, and Thor realized that Loki's pants were very sticky with blood.

"The Chi'tauri are bad," Steve echoed uselessly, "but I didn't think they were strong enough for this."

"It wasn't them," snarled Loki, "it was your rage monster." And then he spat, literally spat at Bruce. It was a lot of audacity for someone who was basically a walking bruise.

"I did this?" said Bruce, but Loki had finally over exerted himself and had nothing more to say as Thor pulled him out of his very deep indent into the floor.

"Loki was transformed into Amora at the time," said Thor slowly, his voice hard, "it was only a mistake." Thor did not sound like he quite agreed with what he had to say, but none questioned him. "We must get Loki to the hospital. But where has Amora gone? I thought you apprehended her when she fell from the sky."

"We did," said Steve, in the same beat as Tony said, "and then she broke out."

"Shouldn't you have asked about this earlier?" asked Natasha, surprised it had taken him so long.

"I had many concerns," said Thor tightly, before looking at Loki, tucked snugly in his arms.

"It doesn't matter, Amora's thoroughly beat and that little army of hers is gone," said Tony, "we should focus on getting this city running again."

"Loki needs medical attention," said Thor. Loki protested weakly, but his words were garbled and only served to prove Thor's point.

"Many need medical attention," said Steve.

Tony did feel kind of bad for Loki. He seemed uptight, but the poor guy hadn't seemed to have gotten a break since he got here, or much of a break at all his entire life.

Tony looked at Loki, and his bloody pants. Wasn't bleeding an obvious sign of miscarriage? He swallowed. Loki was pregnant, even if he didn't look it. Why had the stupid bastard just insisted and insisted on going into battle?

Even if it was Loki's own fault, Tony didn't like thinking about it... They'd both been so ecstatic about the pregnancy...

Tony swallowed. "Yeah, lets get outta here."

 


	25. The Passing of the Solstice

Odin received many letters while Thor and Loki were away, but one that arrived on the Asgardian summer solstice stood out.

_Allfather,_

_We request Loki return home for your summer, as is our conditions._

  
_Laufey_

* * *

Loki lead a feverish sleep for a fortnight in the S.H.I.E.L.D. hospital. The Jötunn had sustained more injuries than he had actually mentioned, with several ribs, his hipbone, the wrist, and several fingers broken. He had internal bleeding, and what looked like a hairline fracture in the back of his skull.

But since he fell into the sleep, the doctors said he was on the mend. Thor sat by his beside, living for those hazy moments that Loki would blink to consciousness for a few minutes.

Thor was informed quietly that Loki had miscarried. They suspected thunderstorms and broken bones. They got mournful rain and Thor crumpled in the corner.

Fifteen days after the battle, Loki woke up, bleary, but rational. "What happened?" he asked Thor, his voice cracked and dry from disuse. "After I was beaten?" 

"Amora flew," said Thor, "she and I did battle, and I gave her a mighty blow from Mjölnir, and she was fallen. The Good Captain and the Man of Iron found her, but she got away."

"Slippery, isn't she?" said Loki. It was then that a healer came in to talk to Loki about his health.

"Hi, Loks!" said the healer, abnormally bright for a S.H.I.E.L.D. healer. Loki narrowed his eye at the nickname. "So I've been looking at your reports, and between this scan and the one before, it looks like your wrist, your hip, and all but one of your ribs is healed, and most of the internal bleeding is gone and hasn't caused anymore complications. Woohoo, right?"

Loki did not woohoo.

The healer waited for him to, but finally continued, "we're still not sure about that hairline skull fracture, but now that you're awake you can take a look at it."

"The child," said Loki.

"Oh, um, the pregnancy..." said the healer. He swallowed, and said, "we're sorry Loki, you miscarried."

Loki knew that was coming but his stomach dropped anyways. "Can you leave us for now?" he asked the healer. The man nodded, and walked out.

Loki raised his hand to his forehead, covering his eyes, and both Thor and Loki were quiet for a long moment, before Thor said, "I am sorry."

"Don't be sorry," Loki intoned, "it was your babe too. Mourn."

Thor quieted, moving to sit carefully on Loki's bedside. They're both what the mortals call "hyperdense" and this bed has been reinforced to hold Thor and Loki, but Thor isn't eager to try it.

"Loki," said Thor, "there will be other pregnancies. We are young, we are fertile. This is sad... But there will be others." Thor could tell his attempt at comfort wasn't working.

Loki pressed a hand against his stomach, and licked his lips, and said, "you had no idea how very pleased I was." He looked away from Thor. "I grew up believing I could never have a family... And I was finally so close to that, and it's just taken away from me."

Thor wondered what it was like, to live on Jötunheimr, to be a Jötunn, and to be small. He hardly even noticed when Loki shifted out of his Asgardian skin to his own, which has also had the clothes cutoff him. Instead, he takes his thumb and traces it along the line curling down his shoulder and finally knotting out at the base of her shoulder.

"My brother is pregnant, you know," said Loki, "he was mated to this soldier Fálki, but Fálki died and left Helblindi alone to care for his get." Thor is quiet. "It will hurt to see Helblindi's baby bump," Loki finally concludes.

"We got the stuff out of your Jötunn clothes," said Thor, trying to air out the silence. He handed Loki a sack. Loki pulled out a peculiar golden knife, and a fortunes worth of jewels. There was a couple tiny journals too, and a set of throwing knives, identical to the odd knife except for the color of the metal of the blade. 

"How long was I asleep?" asked Loki.

"Fifteen days," responded Thor.

"Thor," said Loki, "the Asgardian summer solstice. I was supposed to be in Jötunheimr four days ago."

"Damn," Thor cursed.

* * *

Bruce Banner had very much avoided the room Loki was held in for the past fifteen days. Immediately after the Battle of Manhattan S.H.I.E.L.D. had hidden away all of the Avengers in a bunker like building, to keep them out of public eye, and it had been rough.

When he learned the extent of what he'd done to Loki (what he'd taken away from him) Banner was distraught. He found himself approaching the room once to apologize to Thor, but before he knocked on the door the doctor knew the words would only be caught in his throat.

Loki had been lucid on the fifteenth day, before falling asleep for two hours and now he was supposedly awake again. Thor had gone to fetch Loki clothes besides the hospital gown he was wearing and food for the both of them, so Bruce figured he had a ten minute window to speak privately with Loki.

He knocked on the door, and Loki called, "come in," from inside of his little room, and Bruce wearily opened the door. "Oh, you," said Loki, in a suddenly very bored voice.

"Me," said Bruce, sitting down in one of the hard plastic chairs wearily. Loki raised an eyebrow at the doctor, but didn't object for then.

"You know," the alien said after a few moments silence, "I lost my baby."

"Yes," Bruce said, picking his words carefully, "I know you did, and I am so very sorry."

"You did this to me," said Loki in a steely, sharp voice.

"If there's anything I can do to make up for this, to help," said Bruce awkwardly, his tongue snarling the words in his mouth as he tried to speak faster than he usually did.

Loki interjected, "no, there isn't. I don't want any part of you."

Bruce swallowed, and tried to say, "Loki, I want to help you,"

Loki said, "you can help me by leaving."

Bruce swallowed the lump in his throat and left.

* * *

Angrboda was an old wretch of a Jötunn, living close to the ruins of the old Ice City in a dilapidated little house that had only a common room and a sleeping room.

In the old days, Angrboda had lived in the Ice Palace with the princes of the realm, teaching them from the books their parents imported into the realm from places far away.

After the war however, Angrboda barricaded himself to the little crumbling house outside of the old Ice City and refused to continue his education of the princes unless the princes came to him.

Býleistr had been with the old fool for nearly eight months. His dam had written him two weeks ago saying he could return to Utgard during Loki's stay, a blessing he hadn't expected. He marked the Asgardian solstice on the calendar and counted the seconds until he could leave.

Angrboda straddled him with heavy amounts of homework for the two months he would be away, and then, Býleistr was off. He wasn't sure much of what had been going on at home, he didn't receive much correspondence because he never had time to answer what he got between Angrboda's strict studying, testing, and chores that hardly left time to sleep and eat.

Not that, as Angrboda would say, Býleistr needed to eat too much. Býleistr knw that Heblindi had woken up from his coma, and that Loki had been married off to Asgard and had announced a pregnancy. Helblindi wrote Býleistr saying he too was pregnant, and Býleistr had half of his mind to go get Angrboda to plant him at the time he got that letter so they could all share the experience. Býleistr did not know if Helblindi had really announced his pregnancy for everyone to hear, however.

The trek to Utgard was punishing, as usual, and the wind soon chapped his cheeks and split his skin. The skin around his scars cracked especially, and Býleistr grimaced. He'd get new scars after he completed his learning here withAngrboda, more skin to split.

When he arrived in Utgard, Loki wasn't there at all, which Býleistr certainly hadn't expected as Loki was supposed to arrive sharp on noon at the day of the Asgardian solstice, and Býleistr finally got to Utgard six days after that.

He found his dam cursing, at the time he quietly arrived in the throne room, abandoned except for his dam, his sire, and his eldest brother. "I wrote Odin, I wrote him, and he doesn't even write back to explain!"

"Now, now," said Fárbauti, and Býleistr shifted uncomfortably as he crossed the floor undetected to sit with Helblindi, who made room for him. Although it wasn't prominent, his pregnancy was obvious and Helblindi obviously could not hide that anymore.

"I should march into Asgard right now and retrieve my son," Laufey snarled, pacing the floor.

"And lose everything he sacrificed himself for?" said Fárbauti, "the half-Asgardian get he carries?"

"There won't be a get if the Æsir don't stop poisoning him with their sun!" Laufey shouted, and then he stilled, finally noticing Býleistr. "Býleistr, you have arrived safely," he greeted.

"Yes, I have. I forgot how nasty the winds are in the south this time of year," said Býleistr with a shrug, his dark fingers gripping a bit of cloth on his pants and his eyes drawn to them, not looking at his parents.

"They are pretty terrible when the currents change, aren't they?" intoned Fárbauti.

Fárbauti and Laufey shifted into small talk, trying to welcome at least one of their sons, but Býleistr was uninterested.

"How long have they been fighting about Loki now?" he whispered to Helblindi.

"All the week."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 10k hits, 300 kudos, 50 bookmarks?? 
> 
> Thank you. Everybody.


	26. Things That Don't Make Sense

Thor was desperately trying to put everything together on his own to arrange he and Loki's departure. S.H.I.E.L.D. sent people to and fro the Bifröst site for him to send and receive letters, for which Thor was grateful.

Odin said the day after Loki woke up he sent Laufey letters saying that Loki had miscarried in a fight in Midgard, and that he would be arriving in Jötunheimr soon. 

Thor had many things to put together before then. Loki had to be safe to move. What they called a broken skull appeared to not be making process, but Loki figured that he did not know his own anatomy well enough, being an oddball, and the crack had always been there, and he was suffering no ill consequence from it.

Thor wasn't so sure, but Loki was smarter than he was about a lot of things so Thor took his word for it.

Thor could tell that Loki was more angry and upset than he let on, but did not want to breech the subject and set them further apart when they were truly becoming fond of each other.

The best way to get Loki to stop moping would be to cater to his affections, right? Or show that he cared? So as Thor visited Loki, he asked, "would you mind if I came to Jötunheimr with you?"

"Huh?" asked Loki, genuinely surprised.

"I'd like to come to Jötunheimr with you for the summer, get to know your family, your culture."

"It'll be awfully cold," said Loki.

"I'm a Prince of Asgard, I own many fine furs," said Thor.

"I have no upset with it," Loki said, "but you'll have to write to my father."

Thor decided not to tell Loki he already had. Laufey had said yes.

* * *

"So, you're leaving?" asked Clint as the Avengers all gathered around the conference table.

"For a few months only," said Thor, resting an arm on Loki's shoulder.

"With Amora still at large?" Natasha said.

"Amora will not recover her magicks entirely for at least a year," said Loki, "Asgardians do not regenerate the energy fast enough. She will not be a threat for at least several months more than we'll be away."

"Uh-huh," said Stark loudly, not convinced at all.

"What if something else happens?" asked Steve.

"Although Loki cannot return until the end of the season, if there is truly need of me send a letter to Asgard, and I will come."

"Why does Loki need to go, anyways? He doesn't look about to melt all over the floor," said Tony.

"The heat sickness is coming on me," Loki sneered, "and I would prefer my own mind healers to yours, thanks."

For some reason, Bruce felt like that quip was directed at him, and he stayed quiet.

"That's justifiable," said Natasha, "but how sluggish is our interstellar communication, really?"

"It takes an hour for me to deliver a letter to the Bifröst site and get a response from Jötunheimr," said Thor.

"I can't see why they shouldn't go. And of course I'm the one to say it," said Tony, "two people less in this compound will be awesome, since they're still not letting us go."

"I agree with Tony," said Clint. "We're all fucking antsy, getting the two of you out tomorrow will be good."

Natasha and Bruce nodded, and needing to make admission, Steve said, "yeah, I guess it would work."

"Thank you," said Loki, and for once it didn't entirely sound like he was putting everyone else in the room down.

The others started getting up and trying not to mill around and stare as Thor helped Loki to his feet and kissed his forehead, which Loki found thoroughly offensive and wiped off, letting Thor lead him off and out, back to the tiny quarters Thor had been allotted for them both now that Loki wasn't confined to a hospital bed.

The bed in this little room had a steal frame and a mattress made of something rather stiff, perhaps wood. It didn't feel unsafe as they both laid in it to sleep only minuscule. 

Loki laid down the moment they got to the chambers, but Thor gathered a few things together and threw their issued clothes down the laundry shoot, and rearranged some of the letters on the table pressed next to the foot of the bed. After that, he peeled off his issued clothes he wore then and threw them down the chute, along with helping Loki out of his as they both lay naked under the blanket together.

Loki shifted out of his Æsir form, his body cooling but not unpleasantly so as he turned blue. Thor allowed himself to trace his fingerprints along the patterns of Loki's left arm, as Loki curled into the touch and entwined Thor's feet with his.

Loki fell asleep after awhile of this, and Thor moved aside his thick hair and pressed several kisses to the base of Loki's neck, before letting himself drift off too.

* * *

The next morning they were exhausted. They put on the clothes they wore to Midgard from Asgard, and washed their faces, before letting themselves be strapped into a vehicle. Neither appreciated seat belts or their restrictiveness, but the agents insisted upon them.

They drove to a military air base, and from there they were flown to New Mexico to go to the Bifröst site. Thor had completed this travel round trip more times than he cared to count in the past three weeks, but he still disliked Midgardian modes of transport.

They hailed Heimdall, and left Midgard, and Loki finally let out a heavy breath. Thor gathered some things, and they then departed for Jötunheimr.

Loki immediately switched to his blue form, and Thor grit his teeth against the wind. Within a few minutes of walking they were met by two big warriors, who Loki seemed to know by name as Gunsteinn and Sígga. They greeted Loki as "Little Prince," and Thor as "Odinson."

After that, the walk wasn't much to get into Utgard, and the solid castle complex tat Thor knew Loki called home. Loki had been sluggish for most of the journal, but the site of the palace in Utgard seemed to give him a bit of a bounce in his step.

They were greeted warmly the moment they walked in, in the long open hall. Thor had met all of Loki's family before except for his younger brother, but so far he couldn't distinguish them very well. Helblindi was the one who was pregnant, Laufey wore a crown, and Fárbauti was the largest, so that left Býleistr to be the one that immediately hugged Loki.

Loki returned the affection, and let Helblindi give him a hug as well. Loki tried to keep his eyes away from Helblindi's baby bump, but he couldn't, and jealousy surged through him at the sight of it.

He kept his eye on Thor, to whom Býleistr was currently introducing himself to. His sire then hugged him, followed by his dam.

"How did you lose the child?" asked his dam, leading them all into a sitting room.

"Fight," said Loki, "I was slammed to and fro by a great green berserker... The child was a goner." Laufey only rubbed Loki's back as Loki finally choked out, "if I hadn't insisted on fighting!"

"Loki," intoned Laufey, "you only followed tradition. There is none but honor in that."

"I killed my child," said Loki steely.

"You did not," gritted out Fárbauti, "and your father and I have done worse with you what with the w-" he caught himself, remembering Thor was in the room.

And suddenly Thor was interested. But the Royal Family of Jötunheimr hastily moved onto other subjects, such as Býleistr's learning with some old bat named Angrboda, which devolved into an hour long discussion on military history. Thor was not decent at history, military or otherwise, but that apparently made him a minority in the rule.

This somehow segued into discussing Fálki, who had apparently been mated with Helblindi, but as far as Thor could gather died on the day Thor invaded Jötunheimr, but that didn't make sense, because Býleistr mentioned ashes. The Jötnar did not cremate their dead, and Thor neither the Warriors Three wielded fire in battle.

Next came Helblindi's pregnancy, which was the point when Loki stretched, and announced, "I think I'm rather tired," although it was hardly evening.

"Understandably," said Helblindi, "you must be weary."

Thor followed Loki up a flight of steps down another hallway to a series of rooms, opening the door to a rather cramped bedroom. Not like the one at S.H.I.E.LD.., but definitely not large and luxurious as Thor was used too.

"Washrooms through there," Loki pointed to a door next to the bureau, which had its top stacked full of magic books. Loki himself crawled onto his bed, which was stacked high with huge, shiny furs.

"No, first," said Thor, "you're going to tell me the truth about a few things. Why did your parents start the war, and who is Fálki, and how did he die?"


	27. Thief

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAANNNNGGGGSSSSTTT

There was a tense moment of very straining silence as Loki tried to put his words together. For the first time in a long time, the Silvertongue was speechless as they both stared at each other. 

"Why," said Thor, "why was there a war?"

Loki decided to start from the beginning. "I was born a runt, and my dam was ridiculed for having birthed me. A runt, the second son? What could be expected of me? Not only that, would I ever be able to lead a normal life, to breed? I mean, look at me Thor, look at me right now, could I ever bed a Frost Giant?"

Thor ground his teeth. "No."

"What was there to do with me? Vanaheimr doesn't let in outsiders, and no decent elf or Asgardian would ever take a Frost Giant as his wife..." Loki seemed pained.

"Then my parents remembered Midgard, the miserable rock where people were my size... and my parents thought about it. Midgard was in madness at the time, the people struggling for power in the wake of a fallen empire...." His voice was getting hoarse and weak, as Thor turned himself away from Loki.

"They thought maybe they could conquer it for me.... Give me a place to belong. Then your father came along, and ruined my one chance at having a place where I could belong, where I wouldn't be mocked for being different!" Loki was screaming now, his blue skin getting white in his cheeks and his fist clenched tight.

"Your fathers didn't do anything for you, they killed mortals by the droves, all in your name! Murders! Is that how you wanted your society to begin Loki, your home, with death and illness and frost?"

"They are not my fathers," said Loki slowly and tensely, "I have no father. They are my dam, and my sire. Bý Yggdrasil, get the words right."

"Fine," said Thor. "Your dam and your sire killed. In your name. And you do not see the issue."

"They were only mortals."

"Only mortals? They are people as we, with lives and families, you cannot rule them and love them and be one with people if you see them as beasts!"

"Thor--" said Loki, trying to bring back something resembling calmness, "it's done, it's over." 

"Fine. Lets focus on something newer, who is Fálki, why is he dead?"

There was another pregnant pauses. Loki opened his mouth, and shut it a few times too, before finally saying, "Fálki sired Helblindi's child."

"And how did he die?"

Loki got up, walking to the bureau and opening the drawer, taking out the golden knife he dared not bring to Asgard. "Most Jötunn require the assistance of the Casket to create the knives we use to rip the fabrics of the realms. When I was young, however, and the loss of the Casket was fresh, I found a different way. I channeled Býleistr's ice, nearly killed him too, along with my own unique magic, and created a knife." 

He handed the knife to Thor, who looked it over silently. Loki continued, "I traveled, and came upon a tavern... You and your friends were there, you were drunk out of your wits. I laid with you that night, lured you in with tricks. I stayed up till the middle of the night and when your friends came and fell asleep, I cut off your wench's hair. She knows it was me, now. I stole out into the wood, wrapped the knife in the hair and spoke the spells. It drained the gold in her hair, turned it all black, even what was upon her head."

"Get on with it," said Thor after a moment, tossing the knife back to Loki.

Loki took a deep breath, and went on, "For a long time, my brother went behind our parents back with me, he to hunt and me to travel. I travelled the realms, except for Asgard, looking for knowledge... And then, two years ago, I got cocky. I traveled to Asgard, and found in your libraries a book... It told me how to create a new casket. At least it said it would."

He looked away and the room became quiet for a moment as Loki wiped away a tear. "It said I'd have to kill a willing soul... Somehow, it seemed Býleistr knew what I read. He said he'd do anything for me, that the people of Jötunheimr needed a leader to lead them out of this darkness fallen upon us without the Casket... I couldn't kill my brother, overthrow my own family!"

Loki was starting to shout again, near hysterical. Angry as Thor was, he moved and pulled Loki onto the bed, holding tight to Loki as Loki rubbed away his tears, and choked, "so I told him of your coronation, and he suggested we take the time of the lack of security to steal it, and that we bring Helblindi too so he could take home the glory, and the monarchy would pass as it was supposed too... But on the day we left Fálki followed us, and Helblindi let him."

Loki spit out the next words bitterly, "we got to your weapons vault and were miserably outmatched. The moment we touched the Casket we were faced with a metal man, one who spit fire upon us... Fálki was set alight by him, he died ravaged in the fire. We fled. Not long after we arrived here, so did you..."

Thor said only one word, "thief."

"What was I supposed to do?" exploded Loki. "Kill my brother? Do you understand the pressure put upon me by my own people. They looked at me, their genius, their prodigy, everyone expected me to build a new Casket somehow or mastermind it's return, what could I do?"

"Wait for me to ascend."

"Oh please Thor," snapped Loki, "you were a monster at the time, before your father sent you away for attacking us. More of a monster than any Frost Giant... You came here, enraged when we'd stolen nothing, only lost a comrade, and tried to raze our land... You were nothing but a blood thirsty warmonger!"

"No more bloodthirsty than any Jötunn."

Loki got up and slapped Thor. "I don't know what I felt for you earlier today, be it love or affection, but it is torn clean with that."

Thor could see the pain on Loki's face, but his words had cut like knives, so Thor said, "and you'll never birth a child, mine or other. You've already proved yourself unworthy of mine, and who else would touch one like you, a freak?"

Loki recoiled as if he'd been burned, his shoulders slumping as he hissed to Thor, "get out of my chambers. Leave, now."

Thor did not move.

"Leave!" screamed Loki, pulling Thor to his feet and pushing him through the room. He pushed Thor through the door frame, and the last emotion Thor saw flicker of Loki's face was pain.

Loki slammed the curtains shut, running through the doors of the bathing room, tears starting to slide down his cheeks as grabbed a rag and tried to wipe his face.

Then Býleistr came, from the doors leading from his room. "I heard you two screaming," he greeted.

"I'm sure everyone did!" Loki ground out, flopping to the floor and crossing his legs, bending forward to bury his head in his arms.

"Of what were you screaming, though? You sounded rather incoherent from my perspective," said Býleistr.

"He knows," said Loki, "Thor knows everything now. I have no more secrets."

"The whole dirty? Fálki?" asked Býleistr.

"Absolutely everything. Might as well have told him my life story," spat Loki bitterly as Býleistr turned on the water, tediously heated somewhere in the bowels of Utgard.

"Oh, Loki," said Býleistr, taking off his loincloth and climbing into the large bath basin. Loki pulled himself off the floor and undressed, climbing into the first step and sitting there, as the water quickly filled all the way up and Býleistr turned off the tap and sat next to Loki, the next step down. 

Loki took the ties out of his hair and let Býleistr comb his fingers through it. If any touch was familiar and comforting, it was Býleistr's, the brother he'd always been closer with....

Býleistr took the soap and rubbed some into Loki's hair, before taking the bucket and helping Loki to rinse it out. "Thank you, Býleistr," said Loki. "I don't say that enough."

"There is no need to thank," said Býleistr. "I'm your brother, I'd follow you to the end of the world to keep you happy." Loki fell silent again, lavishing in the water. Býleistr broke the silence, saying, "this will pass, you know."

"No," said Loki. "How do I know?"

"Because you're both going to forgive each other. You've both done wrong, it's only fair. And you both care for each other."

Loki scoffed. "How do you know?"

"I just... I can tell. You'll be happy together again, you'll be the greatest monarchs Asgard has ever known. And you may even learn to love each other."

"I hope you're right," said Loki, "I really wish it. But for my own sanity, I'm going to say you're wrong."


	28. Lights in the Dark

Thor walked straight out of the palace in Utgard, without his things. Nobody stopped him. He was pretty sure he even walked by rugged Fárbauti, who only nodded as he walked past. 

Thor hailed Heimdall and tried to put it all from his mind.

The silent guardian cast a baleful eye upon Thor as Thor swept by him and didn't even offer the pleasantry of a greeting.

The people of Asgard gave him and the horse he took a wide girth, noting the prince's sour expression.

Be immediately encroached himself within the throne room, where his father was speaking with a general. "Father!" shouted Thor, "I should have words with you!" 

"Thor," said the Allfather, "I am busy."

"Father," ground out Thor, "this is important."

"Would you be upset?" The Allfather asked the general.

The general shook his head no, and bowed himself out.

"What is it, Thor?" sighed Odin.

"My marriage was a Jötunn plot," said Thor. "A sham."

"What do you mean?" asked Odin. "Your marriage is the result of your own actions."

"The Jötnar that came to Asgard the day of the coronation. They were Loki, his brothers, and his brother's mate," said Thor.

The Allfather looked conflicted. "I had been actually considering opening negotiations with the Jötnar at the time," he said. "But this..."

"Treachery!" snapped Thor angrily.

"Not treachery..." said the Allfather. "It was scheming.... Fárbauti and Laufey are creatures bound by honor and code. They would not have masterminded this..."

Thor softened. "Loki said it was he."

"But Fárbauti and Laufey must have known... If Helblindi's mate was dead..." and then the Allfather actually laughed. "I daresay, you were Loki's punishment."

Thor broiled. "Allfather!"

Odin just said, "it was odd for Loki to have been so docile... Heimdall watched Loki and his family much in the short years following the war, Loki was always the one pulling the strings behind the scenes..."

* * *

"He left," Loki told Býleistr. "Our sire said he watched him stamp out the door." The two brothers sat upon a spire that had been added to the palace, clinging with ice they called to their hands.

"I'm so sorry," Býleistr said, not sure if there was anything else he could say.

"I'm sure the Æsir will be here soon with a divorce warrant and a hankering for the Casket," said Loki. Even now he could feel the pulse in the ice beneath his fingers, see the construction of homes in the city that had been begun. Once Utgard was built and Jötunheimr had a shiny capital again, they had been planning to build roads. 

Loki supposed that was soon to be suspended.

"Not every trick works forever," said Býleistr.

"It hurts," said Loki, "because I was thinking I may have even started to love him." He turned away to look over the half finished Utgard, and felt the need to break something. "Nobody will ever care for me again."

"I care for you," said Býleistr.

In the same moment, Helblindi's voice called from somewhere below, "Loki!"

Loki and Býleistr leaned over, and saw Helblindi standing on the flat roofed part of the palace. Loki let go of his grips and slid down the spire, before climbing over the separation and to Helblindi, Bý following him close behind.

"Helblindi," said Loki.

"I'm sorry about what happened last night," said Helblindi, "our sire told me of it."

"Gritty story, isn't it?" said Loki sourly. "Look Helblindi, now we both know of heartache. Maybe Bý ought to go next."

"I'm fine with where I am, thanks," said Býleistr, who turned aside to watch the tiny Jötunheimr sun begin to set. 

Loki shuddered from a strong gust of wind. "Lets go back inside," he said, glancing around the rest of the rooftop.

The brothers muttered in affirmation and they went though the door of the roof and down the stairs, all quiet. "Perhaps you should see our parents, Loki," said Býleistr, "they will comfort you."

And like all children eventually do, the three brothers turned and looked back to their parents. They went up the halls to the private parlor, where they found their dam and sire looking at a book and a handful of letters. "All the realms know you been scorned, Loki," said Fárbauti by way of greeting, setting the letters aside on the table and helping Loki up the bench, which was tall enough to be an uncomfortable stretch for Loki to climb upon.

"I love it when people whisper my name," said Loki. Laufey closed the large tome that he had been reading, having folded the corner of the page.

Laufey sighed. "Svartálfheimr is already writing to us offering support should there be war," he said, picking up one slip of paper, tiny in his hands, "and Muspelheimr too." Laufey's tone turned sour as he spoke of Muspell. "Though perhaps it could be a plot to gain entrance to Jötunheimr and kill us all."

"I don't want to go to war with Asgard," said Loki. "I don't even know if I'd like to forgive Thor."

"Unless Asgard declares it upon us," said Fárbauti, "there is not to be a war."

"Sire... May I stay in Utgard even after the summer?" asked Býleistr out of the blue.

"Yes, you may," said Fárbauti after a moment of hesitation. Býleistr had been punished enough for what he had done, Fárbauti thought. Both of his sons had.

"Do you think Asgard will divorce Thor and I?" asked Loki, looking at his hands and keeping his eyes far from those of his family.

"I cannot pretend to know what the old fool Odin would do," said Laufey, "but his son's rage is tumultuous, but fleeting. Give it time and Odinson will let his anger subside."

"Lets just not provoke him in the mean time," suggested Fárbauti, who had begun to organize the letters on the table.

Helblindi laughed, and Býleistr said, "everything will be fine Loki, I swear."

"In the mean time," said Loki, "I think we should concentrate on doing as much with the Casket as we actually can."

"I'm not sure I understand," said Helblindi.

"The Æsir will steal back the Casket if I'm divorced. Until we have word, we should do as much as we can for Jötunheimr while we still have the power of the Casket," Loki explained.

"Why can't Odin ever write me about his son?" muttered Laufey aloud.

"What does your tactical mind think we should do, Loki?" asked Fárbauti, his hands turning a more vivid shape of blue as he mildly called the ice to cover his hands.

"I think we should get all the projects in and started now, instead of one by one. One royal Jötunn for each Jötunheimr reconstruction project," said Loki.

"That sounds fair," said Laufey, "until I get correspondence back from Odin. If he doesn't write back, you don't go back."

"I hope he doesn't write back," said Loki.

"No you don't," said Fárbauti, "if he doesn't write back you get divorced and we lose the Casket again."

"I know," Loki said quietly. The truth was, he was happier than he could even describe to be in a room with just his family. Talking.

"Well, what are we gonna do?" asked Býleistr.

"Bý, why don't you take people back to the old Ice City and oversee reconstruction there?" asked Helblindi. 

"That would mean staying with Angrboda again, wouldn't it?" asked Býleistr.

"So?" said Helblindi.

"He'd make me start up my studies again. And all the workers."

"I'll go to the old Ice City," said Loki. "I'd really like to see it again."

"Alright," said Laufey, making a mark on a blank sheet of paper.

Býleistr said, "I'd like to work on the road between Utgard and the old Ice City." 

"You want to be closer to Loki," Laufey said with a smile.

"As long as I'm not staying with Angrboda," said Býleistr.

"You won't," said Loki with a laugh.

"Well, I'd like to attend the modernization of the fishing towns," said Fárbauti.

"I'll work on the roads from Utgard to the shores," said Helblindi.

"Are you sure you want to work? After what happened to Loki," said Laufey, his words dying out as he finished them.

"I'll only supervise," said Helblindi, "I won't strain myself, my dam, I swear. This pregnancy has been hard enough."

Loki looked away from Helblindi as Helblindi patted his belly. He just couldn't even bare it. How lucky Helblindi was... How Helblindi didn't understand.

"I'll stay in Utgard then," said Laufey. "Someone has to attend the beautification of the place. I'd rather not live in a fort anymore."

Fárbauti let out a guffaw as Býleistr shouted, "to having a palace!"

The royal family said to each other, "to having a palace!" and drank from imaginary cups.

Loki smiled and laughed with his family as the conversation devolved into happy talk of the future, into finding Loki a new mate somehow, into finding Helblindi's son a site. If Helblindi's son needed a sire at all, suggested Helblindi.

And Loki smiled, because he and his family were bringing a bright new age to Jötunheimr, and he didn't have to bed some brute anymore to do it.

 


	29. Know Not Change, Know Not Greatness

"Thor, you told me already what Loki told you," said the mind healer, "how about you tell me what it made you feel?"

Thor fidgeted in the chair, and said, "Betrayed. Used. Lied to." His voice caught in his throat, making him sound pained as he held back tears.

"It's alright to express your emotions, Thor," said the mind healer, "let them all out."

Thor took a deep breath, and cleared his far, wiping away the few tears that had collected in the corners of his eyes. "I loved him. Or at least, I was starting to. And now I learn that I'm just another piece in his game."

The mind healer made a note on a piece of paper.

* * *

A few mornings later, Loki was packing his possessions into a large bag. Cloaks and books, knives and mirrors. All Loki needed to live.

The plans had changed again, and Loki was to work in the road between Utgard and the Old Ice City. Býleistr had been angry, but Laufey stood by his position.

He was staying in a little village directly between Utgard and the Ice City. Construction on the road would go out both ways from the town 

Laufey had called twenty thousand Jötnar to Utgard to participate in building the roads.  Loki had a crew of ten thousand. Loki had also officially decided that he loved power.

He was going to be staying with a Jötunn named Geirni, who was to be the foreman of the project. Geirni was about Loki's age, but his work was well known. Loki understood that Geirni was actually waiting for him now, to escort him to the construction site.

When Loki walked out the door, he was shocked to face someone who actually wasn't all that much larger than him. 

Geirni was not a runt, he was hairless with rough looking skin like any real Jötunn, but he was just so small--his stature was about a head taller than Loki. Loki immediately decided that Geirni was interesting.

"Hello," Loki greeted, slinging his bag over his shoulder. "Are you well?"

"I am well, Prince, thanks," said Geirni, taking the bag from the prince and taking it over his own shoulder instead. Loki could get used to that.

"That's good," said Loki, "how is the food coming, the medicine?" 

"Much better in our village," said Geirni, "since the Casket returned."

"Yes, good," Loki said absently, fixing a few of the buttons on his bag. "I must only say goodbye to my dam then we shall be on our way."

"Of course, Prince Loki," said Geirni.

Loki adjusted the bag and began to walk down the hall, Geirni following closely behind. He turned the corner towards his parents rooms, and knocked on the wall quickly.

Laufey pulled aside the curtain, and said, "Hello, my son." Then he turned to Geirni and greeted, "Geirni the Smith. Come in, come in."

"Oh, no," Geirni spluttered. "I mustn't intrude."

"That is your choice," said Laufey, as Loki scooted by him into his parent's rooms. Laufey shut the curtain, and said, "Loki."

"My dam," greeted Loki.

The two stood divided, neither sure what to say. 

"You will be alright?" Laufey finally inquired after a long moment.

Loki's hand drifted to rest upon his stomach, finally exposed like he was used to, in his Jötnar clothes. "I shall try," he said.

Laufey got to his knees, so he and his middle child stood head to head. Loki held out his hands, which Laufey grasped in his engulfing hold. Dam and child looked at one another, their lips dry and full of empty promises, neither was sure which pleasantry to choose.

"You have changed so much, Loki," said Laufey. "You have changed since you were with the Æsir. It pains me."

"Change hurts," agreed Loki, "but stillness is the Æsir's greatest weakness. Know not change, know not greatness."

"You and your silvertongue, child," said Laufey. Loki closed his eyes.

Loki said after a moments pause, "I learned from the best."

"You flatter me, little liar," said Laufey. "It seems I've barely had you back and I loose you again."

"I was meant to wander," said Loki, for the Silvertongue was as much a wanderer as he was a liar.

"And I was meant to wait and grieve," said Laufey, pulling not his youngest but his smallest close to him, for a hug. "I shall miss you, child."

Loki pulled away from his dam and said, "Goodbye." He escorted himself back to the door, and he greeted Geirni and held back his tears as they began the journey.

* * *

For the strongest king in all the realms, Odin Allfather did a lot of worrying. 

He worried for Loki. Once Thor was gone from Jötunheimr, Loki had veiled his doings from the Allfather and Heimdall, preferring his seclusion and mystique as always.

Odin had a stack of inquiring letters on his table from Laufey, all of which he'd read and none of which he'd answered. They were all on the topic of the continuing of the treaty between the Æsir and the Jötnar, and whether or not the marriage between their children was in tact.

But Odin had long found that when Laufey had no word from him, that Laufey became cautious. A cautious Laufey was never a threat to the Æsir.

Loki was never cautious, but Odin knew Laufey would keep him in line until Loki was summoned at the end of the summer.

Odin worried for Thor as well. Thor, who spent hours with the mind healers but came back no better than before. Thor, who was betrayed. Thor, who wanted to kill Loki and wanted to wrap him up in a hug at the same time.

Odin had much worrying to do.

* * *

The path was long and harsh, perhaps six days walk struggling against the wind. They slept for five nights in caves until they reached the village.

Neither spoke much on the journey. They would have to shout to speak, and neither had much to voice other than unhappy and irritated opinions. 

The village was quaint, much like most civilized parts of Jötunheimr. It had tall walls barricading it from most of the winds, with tiny cottages and stands all over the streets. 

The village gates were opened for the travelers, and Loki noticed that the village was overflowing with guests, his workers who were here to construct the road under his command. The inn had no vacancy, and people slept in the narrow streets.

Geirni led Loki down a side street to one of the cottages, a bit lower built than the others. It was dark inside, but as they stepped in Loki snapped his fingers, and every lantern, candle, and gaslight was lit.

"Thank you," said Geirni in slack jawed astonishment. "That would've taken me much too long to accomplish."

"My pleasure," said Loki. He looked around the cottage mildly. There was a cooking set in this main room, and a small table with three mismatched chairs. Through the curtain was a sleeping room, with furs piled all over the tiny quarters.

"It is modest," said Geirni.

"It will suffice," said Loki. Loki had taken a certain fondness to his traveling companion, which he couldn't quite decide why. For someone he'd spent three days straight with, Loki didn't know much about him.

Geirni started fussing around in his cupboard, pulling out some dried and salted strips of meat. "Would you be persuaded to eat, prince?"

"I would like it," said Loki, pulling out a seat at the table. It was rather like the Æsir tables, short and sturdy, unlike the thin and tall tables Laufey preferred. It was quite nearly the right size for Loki, which he appreciated.

Loki waited silently as Geirni formed two ice plates, which he set strips of salted met upon. Geirni pulled out a chair for himself, and gave Loki his plate. Loki took a bite of his food, and said, "do you oft take your meals alone?"

"Since my parents passed, prince," said Geirni.

"You have not found a mate, Geirni?" Loki inquired.

"I am no runt," quipped Geirni, "but I am small and short as you are. Considered too weak to bear children, to small to mount another."

"I know that classification," said Loki, taking a big bite of the meat. He ignored the bland taste as he ate, knowing that he was so very spoiled. "I will begin buying our food tomorrow," said Loki.

"Oh, no, you already have so many expenses. You're my guest," said Geirni.

"The workers and their rations are already paid," said Loki. He pulled his bag off of his shoulder, and unclipped the latch, opening it up for Geirni to say, "and all this money is mine, for me." 

Geirni looked at the gold inside, and his heart skipped a beat. The money in that bag could keep any Jötunn afloat their entire life. "Oh, prince, no..." Said Geirni.

"I have thrust myself upon you," said Loki, "you will eat well while I infringe upon your home."

Geirni made many other objections, but Loki ignored them, and set his bag by the corner of the room. After the two ate, Loki took off the more irritating of his jewelry as he always did, and put it inside the bag. 

"Where will I sleep?" asked Loki. 

"In the slumber room, with me, of course," said Geirni, pulling aside the curtain

Loki nodded and stepped in as Geirni extinguished all of the lights in the main room.

Loki curled up in Geirni's rough furs, not nearly so fine as any of his. 

After a moment when all the lights were out, Loki felt Geirni lie down next to him, his breath ghosting over Loki's bare back as Loki fell asleep.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry that this chapter took so long. Real life blew up in my face. 
> 
> So, this morning I finally stopped crying for awhile and wrote this transition chapter.


	30. Princely

Loki woke up and blinked. There was dim morning log streaming through a tiny shafted window. The body next to his slumbered peacefully, and Loki reached to tangle his fingers in Thor's hair.

Except there wasn't any hair. Loki's finger touched rough Jötnar skin and the messy scars of a peasant. It wasn't Thor, it was Geirni. Awake now, Loki tried not to scramble graceless as he pulled away his hands and untangled his feet from Geirni's. Geirni slept on silently.

Loki was a little irritated that Geirni had dared sleep so close to him. He looked around the tiny room and realized he'd bathed in bathtubs bigger than it, the quarters he and Thor had shared on Midgard after the battle with Amora seemed luxurious in comparison. It would be unrealistic to expect Geirni to drag out a fur and sleep on the stone floor of his own cottage.

Loki pulled himself into a squat, and then a stand. He stepped over Geirni's body, and he pulled the curtain open so he could step into the main room. He took his bag and put all of his jewelry back on for the day, his necklaces, bangles, and cuffs, all the studs he clipped into his ears and face.

He carefully took his other possessions from the bag. The books and journal he brought he put on the corner of the table, and the ink went inside the cabinet. He moved his extra knives from his bag to his cloak that he'd hung on a hook by the door the night before.

Loki heard the curtain be pushed aside, and turned to look at Geirni, who rubbed his sleepy red eyes. "Good morning, prince," said Geirni.

"Good morning," said Loki. Geirni opened his cabinet, and wrinkled when he saw that the prince really was making Geirni's house his home, from the ink in the cabinet to the books on his table and the other minor possessions strew across Geirni's usually tidy main room. 

He sighed as he pulled out cups for the both of them.

Geirni was really not impressed.

He called forth the ice into the cups and melted it. He set the cups on the table and went back to the cupboard, taking out some more salted rations and thin slices of bread that he set on the table before a Loki. 

Loki had placed himself in the chair as he had the night before, and he split the rations. He pulled his to his side of the table and began to ate. Geirni watched him. Loki ate slowly and methodically where Geirni ate with gusto.

Except for his mate scars, all of Loki's scars were line perfect. He'd been scarred by those who had trained in the art of it. Geirni had been scarred by his father, a fisherman, with metal fishing hooks, the only sharp metals they had owned. Ice was not sharp enough for fine, careful, and deliberate scars that were made in formal scarring ceremonies.

They were both dreadfully, hatefully short, but how different were Loki and he.

* * *

Loki sat in the meeting, trying not to yawn.

His status was made evident by his surroundings. He was dressed most decadently, with fine cloaks and all his gold jewelry. The others wore a stud of silver in their lobes if they were rich, and they wore plain, rough furs. The ice chair he sat in was huge, and he lay on his back in it, staring at the ceiling of the village center.

Since when was building a road so damn complicated? Loki thought that you just got your laborers together and did it.

Apparently plans were to be drawn and mixtures were to be finalized. It was all very boring.

Loki played with his nails, and jumped when Geirni snapped, "Prince, would you deign to pay attention?"

A hush fell over the room as everyone flushed in their sears, turning nervous eyes to the young planner.

Loki straightened himself and leaned in forward to stare at Geirni, who held his ground and glared back. The others in the room fidgeted and glanced around at one another, sitting and waiting for something to happen.

Loki and Geirni were tense as they gave each other long, cold looks, but Geirni didn't back down. Loki finally sighed, and said, "fine."

"Prince, we have documents from your dam that need your signature to begin construction," said one of Geirni's colleagues. Loki took the ink and quill from the center of the table and quickly scribbled his signature over the papers without even looking at them.

With the papers signed, the meeting finished its business quickly, and Loki noticed how quick everyone but Geirni was to get out of the room. Geirni sat at the table, with one hand resting atop the other. "You spoke down upon me," said Loki.

"You were not paying attention," said Geirni, as if that changed anything. 

"So?"

"You and your family can give us the Casket and warmer weather all you want, but you can't convince your laborers you care for them if you can't even listen," said Geirni.

Loki was quiet for a long, tense moment. Geirni got up from his chair, and held out a hand to Loki. Loki grasped his hand and let Geirni help him to the ground. Loki stuffed his hands into his pockets.

The two walked back to Geirni's cottage in heavy silence. "You know, I'm not angry with you," Geirni said when they arrived.

"Then what are you with me? I know it's not amicable," Loki taunted.

"Exasperated."

"What?"

"You, Loki, Fárbautason, are a spoiled brat!"

"Hey!"

"You asked me a question prince, did you not?" said Geirni. The pair was quiet.

"Would you remind me what was on those papers?" asked Loki.

"I can't, I didn't read them."

"Oh, why didn't you? You're the foreman."

"I can't read," said Geirni.

"Oh," said Loki. He grabbed his notebook and got up for his ink. "I will teach you, then."

* * *

Amora hid. She crouched, she cowered, she feared.

Like any magician worth their salt, Amora had many shapes that she could take to hide. The problem was, even if she looked different, she wasn't different, and these mortals could recognize the physiology of an Asgardian on their sensors from a mile.

She was stranded, abandoned, and afraid. 

Amora the Enchantress truly had no one to turn to, but perhaps that was made her twice as daring, as she burned a suburb of the great city of New York to the ground, and whispered her incantations that salted the Earth itself.

* * *

"Amora's back," said Natasha, rushing into the conference room in Stark Towers with a stack of stapled papers that she passed out quickly to everyone.

"It was too much to hope for a birthday," said Tony with a yawn.

"What'd she do?" asked Steve, grabbing a pen and writing his name on the top of his papers.

Bruce held up his packet, opened to page three, and said, "she burnt down a subdivision in a suburb outside of the city." The information had been highlighted in orange already. Bruce's highlight stood uncapped next to him and poised for its next use.

"And that's why you never live in suburbia," said Tony.

"Shut up," said Clint.

The Avengers all took a long moment to flip through their packets. Bruce's brow furrowed as he came across some sort of graph on the last page. Finally, Bruce held up his packet again, showing the others the graph that they all flipped to. "Look," said Bruce. "Last time we fought Amora S.H.I.E.L.D. analyzed the energy signature of all the magic she did. Most of it was electromagnetic radiation with the Chi'tauri. But the people fighting her today scanned her trace and found gamma radiation..."

"So?" said Steve.

"The patterns in it almost exactly matched the observations we got from Loki."

"So you think we're going to need Loki to defeat Amora?" asked Natasha.

"We'd probably need Loki's power to defeat her for good. She used her power at the last second to get away when we fought her, and today. Loki could probably strop that."

"Maybe they wanted to be alone..." said Steve. "Loki did miscarry. He's probably a mess. Do we want him fighting for our side."

"But Loki and Thor are world's away," said Clint. "We can't just send them a letter."

"We can try," said Tony. "All Thor and Loki do to make contact is scream at the sky."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bratty Loki, my baby!


	31. Infatuations and Distractions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to mention: this story s almost 50k now, and that's amazing. That's the second longest thing I've ever written (my novel being the first.)
> 
> Just wow. Goddamn. I wouldn't be here without all you commenting, just worth mentioning. :)

They'd written a letter, done in careful and neat handwriting. Bruce had remembered that Thor had been able to read written word well, but printed text seemed to bother his eyes. They weren't sure why, but they figured it must have been something to do with the whole Alltongue thing that they couldn't discuss because Amora was taking over the world.

They set the letter on the roof of Stark Tower, and Tony called, "hey, Heimy, it'd be really cool if--"

"No," said Steve, cutting Tony off with one raise of his hand. Tony shut up. Steve said, "Heimdall, if you are watching, we ask you send this letter to Asgard."

Everyone got worried for a moment when nothing happened. But then Natasha yelled, "cover!" and everyone got into the shelters as the winds picked up and the clouds distorted. After a flash of light, the letter was gone.

"Well, now we wait," said Clint.

* * *

Thor was delivered the letter from the Avengers of Midgard by a herald. After waving the man away, Thor struggled with the envelope that hadn't been sealed with wax, but some strange adhesive. In the end, he just ripped it and pulled out the thin Midgardian paper.

He sat down on a chair and unfolded the papers. The letters were neatly made, and he quickly read over the note, one passage standing out to him.

" _The Avengers really ask that you bring Loki back for assistance, Amora's magical signature has changed, and we need the expertise of someone like Loki who can practice it._ "

Thor folded the papers back up and stuffed them in a pocket. He got up and strode out of his room until he came upon the Allfather's parlor. 

Odin was already looking wearily at the door as Thor confidently walked in. "Father," said Thor, "Midgard has great need of Loki and I, we must summon Loki to Asgard and depart."

Thor threw the letters at the table, but Odin did not look at them. "Loki was unconscious the last battle, was he not? Why do they need him?"

"This is matters of magic," said Thor.

Odin was unimpressed. "You will go, Loki will join you in Midgard at the equinox."

"Can I at least write him?" said Thor.

"No," says Odin. "Heimdall cannot see Laufey or his family, but keeping him in the dark as well controls them. We mustn't say a word if we want your marriage to sustain. Laufey will keep your husband in line."

"Marriage..." sighed Thor. Loki was like a constant figure in his life that was missing now, Thor just kind of forgot they were married sometimes.

"Prepare to leave, my boy," said Odin.

* * *

"Are we done fighting over my princeliness now?" Loki asked the next day over breakfast. They were eating richer bread and fresh fish, for which Geirni was grateful of but still reluctant to accept.

"I suppose," said Geirni, "if you learn to admit you're in the wrong."

"That, my friend, is something I will never learn to do," said Loki.

"It was worth of a try, think, I might have humbled the future Queen of Asgard and the Prince of Jötunheimr!" Geirni joke.

Loki laughed. "There is no humbling one such as me."

"And I must accept you for that, and thank you for my meal," said Geirni, gesturing at the few little crumbs left on his plate that he picked at with his fingers.

"I'm not going to sit in the meeting today," said Loki. 

"You aren't?" said Geirni, surprised.

"I bought another loaf of rich bread," said Loki. "I'm going to pass bread to the children of your village."

"You're a good man, even if you try to hide it," said Geirni.

"No compliments," said Loki, getting up and pulling the loaf out of the cupboard and squeezing it with his hands. It was rich and hearty bread, Geirni could see, with bits of Asgardian nuts and Vanir dried fruit embedded in it. Wedding bread. Expensive bread. The kind of bread royals ate.

"You know how happy those children are going to be?" said Geirni, pointing at the bread.

"Why else would I buy it and give it to them?" said Loki, irritated.

"I apologize," said Geirni.

After a few minutes more, Geirni got up and ruffled Loki's hair, and Loki playfully pushed his hand away like he would Býleistr's or Helblindi's. Loki tried not to grin as he watched Geirni's back walking out into the village. He rearranged a bit of his hair in the reflection of his knives. He squeezed the bread again, and put it down on the table.

Loki pulled a cloak off the peg and pulled it over his shoulders, tying the knot. He took the bread again, and walked out towards the center of the village.

Loki had enjoyed a warm reception in the village since his arrival. He was a novelty, and everyone was interested in the housing of one of their callous princes. So, even today as he walked out with very little gold or nice things upon him he drew attention.

A child, about up to his hip, very young, ran up to Loki and tugged on his cloak. Loki smiled as the little child said, "Hi."

Loki bent his knees and said, "Hello." He showed the boy the bread, and ripped off a chunk that the child grabbed enthusiastically.

"Thank you," said the little boy, holding the chunk of bread. His voice was full of wonder, and after a moment of gazing at Loki, he ran back to his parents who were waiting for him a short distance away. Loki watched as the child ripped the chunks.of bread up and handed pieces to his parents.

Loki spent the rest of the day walking around the village and giving business to the vendors, and giving away food to children.

By the time night began to fall, Loki was tired and walked back to the cottage.

When he entered, there were two people in the cottage instead of just the one Loki was expecting. Geirni sat at the table with another, who was slightly taller than him but with the same eyes and a similar chin.

"Good evening, Loki," said Geirni. He gestured to the Jötunn beside him. "This is my brother, Sæhildr."

"Hello, Sæhildr. I am Loki Laufeyjarson," Loki greeted.

Sæhildr bowed his head. "Hello, my prince."

"I have dinner," said Loki, pulling a new loaf of bread from his cloak and setting it upon the table. Sæhildr sat in the seat Loki usually set himself in, so Loki took the third chair and tore off a chunk of bread with his fingers. "Do you live in this village, Sæhildr? May I call you Sæ?"

"I live in the next village over," said Sæhildr. "And Sæ works fine."

"Fabulous," said Loki, picking up the bread and offering it to Sæ.

Sæ took the bread and took a bit. He handed it back to Loki, who handed it to him again, so Sæ took another piece. "Thank you," said Sæ.

Sæ handed the bread to Geirni, who took his own piece. Sæhildr turned out to have been recruited to help Geirni organize the laborers, and would be staying in the town center.

"Sounds interesting," said Loki.

"And what's your role in all this?" asked Sæ. 

"Money and reputation," said Loki. 

"Loki is very honest," said Geirni.

Sæ shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "If you don't mind, my brother, I would like to speak with the prince privately, if only for a moment."

"Of course," said Geirni. Loki stood up and brushed himself off, letting Sæ lead him outside.

"Yes?" asked Loki.

"Geirni's got an infatuation with you," said Sæ. Loki opened his mouth, then closed it. He wasn't sure what to say. "He hasn't outright said it, but I know he's got one. I'm his brother."

"Oh," Loki managed to say stupidly.

"He was gushing about you before you got home. How you helped the children, how lovely you are, how headstrong, though not to humble, which does bother him..."

"So?" said Loki.

"He knows that you are ridiculously above him in station, but he can't help feeling... Loki, are you playing with my brother?" said Sæ. 

"What? Of course not. Tops are for playing with, not people," said Loki. Sæ gave Loki a long, chilled look. "What would I have to gain by playing with your brother?"

"Even if your not playing with him, you're leading him on," said Sæ. "Look, you know how actual runts and just short ones end up if they survive into adulthood almost all the time. Petty. Angry. Violent. Geirni's an exception, and you're the first other exception he's met."

Loki was quiet. Was he an exception to that?

"Look, Loki, I'm sure you're amazing. But you're married. Make it clear to Geirni that there is absolutely nothing between you, for his sake, okay?" said Sæ.

"Alright," said Loki, and the two walked back into Geirni's cottage.

That night, as Loki slept beside Geirni, they faced each other. Loki laced his fingers with Geirni's at some point, and couldn't help but like it. 

No, he was married. He shouldn't.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know you all hate it (;)) but I Totes McGoats ship Loki/Geirni. Loki is my fandom bicycle, I ship him with everyone, so.


	32. The Wanton One

"Sir, Thor seems to have arrived on the roof," J.A.R.V.I.S. said.  

Tony jolted awake, looking around his half lit lab and the monitor in front of him, which had all of the information they'd collected about Amora on it. "What time is it?" Tony asked blearily.

"3:38 AM, sir."

"Time differences," grumbled Tony. "Send him down here."

"Of course, sir."

The next time Tony woke up it was to the sound of Thor's thunderous foot steps, at 3:41 AM.

"Hey big guy," said Tony. "Where's Loki?"

"Loki and I are separated as of now," said Thor, with an uncomfortable look begging Tony to change the subject.

"Okay, marital problems. This hour is too obscene to pry. Anyways, maybe you'll be able to help us decipher some of the information we have in the morning." Tony let out a big yawn. "I'm sorry, but I'm just beat. We can talk in the morning. Or, more likely, the afternoon. Okay?"

"Of course. I shall occupy myself upon your couch in the parlor room," said Thor.

Thor watched as Tony leaned his head on his hand and fell promptly asleep. Thor was not tired, it was only noon on Asgard when he had left her, but he could sit and wait for a couple hours. Perhaps it was time Thor practiced his patience.

* * *

Helblindi tried to keep his own thoughts second to his responsibilities. After all, his brothers had been taught many times that selfishness never worked out for royalty, although he wasn't sure if either had ever learned it.

In truth, he still grieved over Fálki and his head still hurt him. Every night before Helblindi drifted into his slumber, he'd rub his hands over the mate scars he'd refused to have burned away.

The Fálkason he carried would have the same markings. Helblindi was never sure if once the child came it would hurt him or heal him.

Either way, the child was coming soon.

* * *

Thor sat upon Stark's sofa, as he had said he would, with a book.

The letters on the page hurt to read. They confused the Alltongue, which was specified to work upon handwritten words. Asgard and the other realms had no need of printed words, for anyone of right to be literate appreciated the quality of a good, handmade book.

Thor could read and understand some of the novel he held, but in truth it was rather dull to him.

He looked up as a light pair of footsteps entered the room, heels clicking on the floor. "Oh!" said the woman, a tall strawberry blonde. "You're Thor, I would guess? I'm Pepper Potts."

"Pleased to make your acquaintance, my lady," said Thor.

"I could get used to being called Lady," said Pepper. "So, I thought you were bringing your wife with you? That's what Tony said."

Thor winced. "I am not in contact with Loki at the moment."

"Oh, I'm sorry." Pepper put down what she was carrying on the coffee table, and invited Thor into the kitchen. "Here, I picked these up for you, I heard you liked them."   She reached into one of the many cupboards and pulled out a box of PopTarts. She gave it an odd look, as it was lighter than she would have thought, and opened the box to find only one packet of confectionary breakfast food left. Taking it in stride, Pepper said, "Oh, you were already in here. I'll have J.A.R.V.I.S. place an order for more."

"Already done, Ms. Potts," chimed in J.A.R.V.I.S.

"Thank you," said Pepper, as she turned on the coffee maker and pulled out her own low carb cereal at the same time. "Would you want anything Thor?" she asked. 

"No, m'lady," said Thor. "I am rather to anxious to eat, actually."

"Alright," said Pepper.

Pepper thankfully had the gift of small talk, quizzing Thor about his life on Asgard, Jane, what he liked about Midgard (Jane), his favorite foods, and Jane. She kept Thor busy and occupied as The Avengers began to drift into the communal kitchen, yawning and stretching, all making a beeline for the coffee pot Pepper had started earlier.

Natasha was the first to arrive. She and Pepper shared an easy respect, and after cutting up one of her oranges and pouring a mug of coffee, Natasha had sat down beside Pepper to listen to Thor talk.

Clint arrived next, noisy as humanly possible as he put a slice of toast in the toaster and distracted everyone from Bruce arriving, who started to fry eggs.

Steve arrived not long after, looking bright and well slept as always. "Hello, Thor!" he greeted.

"Greetings, Captain Rogers," said Thor.

"Is Loki around?" asked Steve.

Thor bristled, but he knew he had to talk about what had happened eventually. "Loki and I had a fight, and haven't spoken since. He is with his family in Jötunheimr for the summer."

"Oh, I'm sorry," said Steve. There was a general murmur of agreement.

Thor sighed. "The fight was my doing, but I am still angry with Loki. I am sorry that you asked for him and it is only I."

"No, don't worry about it," said Bruce. "You're still more useful than any of us with Amora."

Clint chimed in, "Maybe we'll be able to get her before Fall swings around and you and Loki have to kiss and make up."

"I am not sure how much help I will be with identifying and understand the magic Amora is doing," said Thor.

"Better six of us than five," assured Steve.

* * *

As Loki set dinner upon the table that evening, he was tense. Both Loki and Geirni knew something had passed between them the night before, but neither had seemed able to press the issue in the morning.

Geirni arrived back from the site and gave Loki his report upon the project, which Loki made notes upon in his writing book. The two sat in silence for awhile, before Geirni said, "I would like to ask you something."

"What?" asked Loki.

"Well... There were rumors..." said Geirni.

"Spit it out," Loki said, tapping his foot.

"Were you and the Thunderer expecting a child?" asked Geirni.

Loki's face softened. "Yes, we were," he said after a moment. "It was killed by a berserker in a battle in Midgard."

"I am sorry for your loss."

Loki looked as if he was trying to remain strong about it, biting his lip and clenching his fingers, but he failed as the tears welled over his eyes. "I haven't really done much crying over it, you know," said Loki. "Been too busy keeping busy. Jötunheimr and Thor and bloody Amora..."

"Shh," said Geirni, getting out of his seat to pick Loki up and settle on the floor with Loki in his lap. "Just because you're royalty doesn't mean you're not allowed emotions," said Geirni, rubbing the prince's back as Loki's tears dried just as quick as they came.

"It was... The first time I'd ever thought children could be possible for me," said Loki. "And it was torn cruelly away."

"You and Thor fought, I knew that," said Geirni, still rubbing Loki's back because Loki never had told him that he couldn't.

"Thor told me I didn't deserve to be a parent."

"Loki, I have not known you for long or very well," said Geirni, "but you deserve anything you put your mind to getting, I would say."

Loki pulled further from Geirni, and looked him in the eye for a long moment, his eyes carefully blank. 

Before Geirni could realize what was about to happen, Loki wrapped his hands about Geirni's neck and pulled him in for a long, testing kiss.

They broke apart as Geirni gasped for air, caught by surprise, and Loki gave him a look from between heavy lidded eyes that Geirni couldn't discern as anything except for lust. "Loki," Geirni started to say, but couldn't get anything else out, before Loki kissed him again as if he was trying to take Geirni's very soul from him.

Geirni pushed away the little prince, "Loki, no," he said. "You're married."

"Like Thor won't take his own lovers," whispered Loki, pulling closer again. He nipped at Geirni's ear, causing him to yelp, Loki smirking as Geirni's fingers splayed over the scars on his upper back.

"Loki," said Geirni again, but Loki silenced him by sticking his fingers in Geirni's mouth.

Sufficiently shocked, Geirni didn't say anything as Loki pulled his fingers away a second later. "Geirni, please," Loki said, his spit wetted fingers tracing Geirni's familial lines. "I choose you," he said.

"Loki, I'm a commoner," said Geirni.

"And they treat me like one in Asgard," said Loki, pulling closer to Geirni to straddle his hips. "Take me, Geirni. In a way Thor could only wish for."

"Never," whispered Geirni.

"Then I suppose it's a mighty fine time for me to learn to give," said Loki, kissing Geirni one last time on the lips.

Flustered and confused, Geirni pushed Loki off of him and helped Loki to bed, humming broken melodies until Loki fell asleep, still touching every bit of Geirni he could get his fingers on.

Feeling somehow guilty, Geirni pulled away from the lust addled prince, and went to spend the night with Sæhildr. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Loki's a slut.


	33. Sharp Words, Dull Hurt

Thor sat in the padded chair as Tony and Bruce pulled up some diagrams on their computers. He squinted at the charts and the tiny text, and finally asked, "What does this all mean?" 

Bruce said, "we see expecting you to not understand. Basically, what these readings mean, is that Amora's magic was giving off different energy before, but now, to us, it looks a lot more like Loki's."

Thor seemed puzzled for a long moment, and he looked as if he was trying to dig up some long lost memory. "I learned that Æsir, Jötnar, and Vanir magic all move along the same medium," said Thor. "That is why if you may learn one, you can learn much of the other two. But I know Álf magic is different, and is used differently. I would know little else."

"So you're saying that magic can transmit along different frequencies, or even different energy sources?" said Tony.

Thor looked bewildered.

"He means, there are different ways to conduct magic?" said Bruce.

"Yes, of course," said Thor. "There are few who can master magickries that move along different mediums. Loki is one of the few, Amora is not."

"So you're saying, if Amora's magic changed, then that probably means she's using someone else's magic now, or she was?" said Bruce.

"I am not precise in the subject," bristled Thor, "I spent most of my magic classes sleeping. I had little use for a subject I could not wield."

"We understand, Thor," said Bruce, as Tony privately balked at the idea of dozing during _freaking magic lessons_.

"I am sorry I am not of more help," said Thor.

"No, seriously, this is a lot of help already," said Tony. "If only we had Loki."

Thor's lip curled.

* * *

Loki woke up alone.

He was not sure if he regretted what had transpired the night before, but by the fact that Geirni had vacated his own home, it must have been rather unwanted by Geirni in all.

He got up and stretched. He pushed the curtain from the sleeping room out of the way, and began to cut up bits of bread for his breakfast. He jumped as he head the main curtain be flung aside, and Geirni stepped into his cottage.

They both stared at each other for a long moment, neither sure how to broach the subject.

"I forgive you," Geirni finally said, stepping up a ripping a chunk of bread from the loaf.

"Well, I still want you," Loki said decisively.

"You're having a temporary lapse of judgement," Geirni insisted, "and I forgive you for that."

"I am not having a lapse of judgment," Loki snapped.

"That's just what someone having a lapse of judgement would say!" Exclaimed Geirni.

"Geirni, please," said Loki. "You comfort me."

"Loki, I'll do anything for you. Except for that." 

"Geirni," whined Loki.

"I'm leaving now."

* * *

Amora's second attack came the day after Thor arrived. She'd set fire to a strip mall, and had taken to terrorizing the people involved in the disorderly evacuation from above.

From Thor's quick observations after the Avengers had split up to look for Amora's weaknesses and the help the civilians, Thor decided Amora wasn't looking well. The healthy and supple Enchantress he once knew was pale and gaunt, with a nasty looking cut along her cheekbone. 

She was laughing in short, hoarse, and broken gasps, but as Thor got closer he realized Amora looked as I'd she was about to cry.

"Ah hah!" she shouted. "If it isn't the spoiled Odinson!"

Her face was alight with some kind of perverse glee, even with her eyes watering. But Thor stood his ground, and replied, "Amora, the wrongs you were dealt were not of these people, let their city be."

"But Thor, it pains you to see these people suffer for the sins which are yours." Amora grinned wolfishly.

Thor let out a roar, and hurtled himself forward by way of Mjölnir. He grabbed Amora about her waist and slammed them both into the part of the roof of the burning building which was still intact. "You longed for this, didn't you," he snarled, holding her  down.

"I did once, but I'm not stupid anymore," Amora taunted. "And neither is your Jötunn slut of a wife, after what you did to him."

"Shut up," Thor ground out.

"Don't you remember Thor? I'm a seer."

"None can see Loki."

"An Æsir sentry can't," Amora spat. "But it is not hard for one such as I, who has seen the truth, to deconstruct your wife's pathetic Jötunn charms of cowardice."

"Liar!"

"Isn't that your wife?" Amora grinned. "Poor Thor fights for mortal bugs, while his wife's in Jötunheimr begging a commoner into his bed."

"Shut up!" Thor roared. He raised Mjölnir to strike, but Amora faded away.

Disgruntled beyond belief, Thor vaguely heard Natasha say over the device in his ear, "Thor, what happened? She's gone." 

Thor brought himself to the ground, when the others in the group had assembled now Amora was gone. "Thor, what's wrong? You look like you just saw a ghost," said Steve.

"Amora told me Loki is having an affair," said Thor.

"It's Amora, grain of salt, buddy," said Tony. 

"Loki wouldn't cheat on you," said Steve. "Wait, he wouldn't, right?" When he thought about it, no one knew Loki very well, because he'd kept to himself all through the first stint with Amora.

Thor paled. "After our last encounter... I wouldn't put it past him..."

"What did you do?" Natasha asked after a long moment.

"Can we talk about it in the tower?" asked Thor.

"Sure, lets beat it," said Tony.

Thor looked as if that was not how he wanted that diversion to go, but the Avengers helped with an obligatory bit of clean up before leaving the scene. Thor, who as far as anyone knew him, was usually exuberant and outgoing. However today he was subdued and frowning.

They have him his space back up the tower, and as they all sat down around the dining room table, Thor let out a heavy sigh. "Thor, could you tell us what happened since we saw you last?" Natasha asked.

So Thor explained. He told them of Loki and his family's odd ways of skirting about conversations, of Loki's confession to Thor about the sham of a marriage, and how Thor and Loki had screamed and shouted in each others faces. How Thor had walked away.

"And they say I'm a volatile personality," said Tony, the first to react.

Thor huffed and preened, and Steve said, "I guess you've dug yourself quite a hole."

"Is there anything you can do?" said Bruce.

"The Allfather has forbid contact with Jötunheimr until the Asgardian summer is over," explained Thor. "If Laufey is kept in the dark, he will keep cautious and his family will follow him in line. However, if Amora truly has beat down Loki's cloaking, and he is apart from his family... I'd confess to having not an inkling of an idea of what Loki would do."

"Harsh," said Tony.

"Excuse me for saying this, but you're fucked up," said Clint.

"I'm afraid I don't understand," said Thor.

"Oh, quit beating the bush," said Clint. "You say stuff to someone like the stuff you just described, and it fucks them up. Don't pretend you wouldn't figure that out."

Bruce nodded. "I wouldn't put it in the same words, but Clint is right," he said. "You put Loki on the defensive."

"Question," said Tony. "Are affairs common in your little arranged marriage scheme?"

"Affairs are common in Asgard," said Thor. "I have many half brothers and sisters. But in Jötunheimr, once a pair has scarred each other, the mating is considered permanent. It would bring dishonor to consort with another, if your original mate is still alive," said Thor. "I think."

"So Loki, if he is having this affair, is breaking all cultural tradition?" said Tony.

"Yes," said Thor.

"Oh no," said Clint, "we aren't letting Thor off the hook for the shit he said to Loki. I wouldn't blame Loki for running to the first guy he could after hearing shit like that."

"I have realized what I have done is wrong, and I struggle with the guilt," said Thor. "Is that not enough?"

"No. I'm just gonna make sure you apologize first chance you get, because I don't want an intergalactic incident showing up in my town because you called Loki a cow or something," said Clint. "So get drafting."

"I'm inclined to agree," said Steve, and the others nodded.

"Alright," said Thor. "I shall."

* * *

_Býleistr-_   


_I am not honestly sure what I am thinking upon this point._

_I am hurt beyond comfort by Thor, yet Geirni, the brat I stay with manages where our family and you could not._

_And Geirni, I want him._

_Is it so terrible a thing to want? I'm married to a brute who loves me not, is it so terrible of me to show the affections mutual?_

_Geirni doesn't want me back, Býleistr. But I want him so much._

_He is lovely. I want to rip off his rough furs and kiss every bit of skin._

_He says no, Bý._

_What am I thinking?_

_Talk me out of it, Bý._

_-Loki_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ANY AND ALL TAKE NOTE OF THE NEW TAGS I ADDED LAST CHAPTER. THEY WILL BE KICKING IN NEXT CHAPTER.


	34. Powder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Geez, last chapter was that bad? And here I was, I thought it was ballin'. Tough crowd.

The instance of Loki's inappropriateness had passed, and Geirni had put it behind him to continue work on the road. It was coming along nicely, about a third finished from both ways.  

The two had settled back into a routine. Loki would give food and money to the children of the village in the mornings, and then in the afternoons he would come to one of the work headquarters or a sight and pretend that he had any idea what was going on.

Geirni would walk Loki back to the cottage afterwards, and the two would help each other with dinner in silence. They would go to be, both as far away from the others skin as was possible. 

One night at dinner, Loki asked, "how come you haven't all that many scars?"

"What do you mean?" asked Geirni.

"We'll," said Loki, getting up from his chair and touching Geirni's forehead, "here are your natural lines. Your mother and your father. You have a scar here." He touched the back of Geirni's right shoulder. "That is your brotherhood scar from Sæ. And you've got your manhood scars on the side of your head. How come you haven't any others?"

"That's all I need, right?" said Geirni uncertainly, looking over his body. 

"Don't you like decorative scars?" said Loki.

Geirni looked at Loki's scars. He had scars that denoted wealth and privilege, his mate scars, his brotherhood scars, and scars for achievements. Then Geirni realized some of the scars didn't really mean anything at all. Decorations.

"You don't add more pain than you need when you're a peasant," said Geirni.

"I didn't have painkilling ice when I got mine," said Loki.

"I don't care about painkillers, but I'm sure scarring yourself with a fishing book is less comfortable than with knives and scarring tools."

Loki thought about it for a moment. "Would you like some decorative scars?"

"Um, I don't know..." 

"Come on, it'll be fun. Experience, Geirni." 

"Fine," Geirni gave in.

"One requirement, my friend, you return the favor."

"Alright," said Geirni uncertainly. Loki walked over to where his cloak hung on the hook, and pulled out his metal knives.

"Lie on your stomach on the floor," he instructed. Geirni followed Loki's directions, already feeling weary. Loki climbed on top of Geirni and straddled his back, laying his right palm on Geirni's lower back. Geirni braced himself as Loki started to casually cut, digging through the skin of Loki's side easily, blood welling up.

Geirni squeezed his eyes shut and refused to open his mouth, the pain overcoming him. It was all he could do not to scream. Loki made easy, lazy cuts around the pattern of his palm, his hand quickly getting covered in blood, but the scar was simple and quick, and before he knew it he was pressing stray cloth on Geirni's back, and whispering words to make the wound scab over. "Was that so bad?" he asked.

"Yes," said Geirni, but he followed Loki's lead and the two switched places, Geirni putting his hand on a blank space in Loki's lower back and carving around it quickly and a little sloppily. To his satisfaction, Loki seemed in some pain too. As soon as Geirni was finished Loki was whispering his words again and feeling the rough scabby cuts. 

"See?" said Loki. "Now there will always be a part of us with each other."

Geirni pressed his lips together, and said, "perhaps I would come to like it, but I wouldn't do it again."

Loki put his hand back in its spot designated by Geirni's new cuts, pulling Geirni closer to him. Geirni instinctively bent his knees a bit as Loki leaned on his toes, planting a soft peck on Geirni's lips and then moving away so he could go to bed. 

Geirni couldn't help being a little ashamed of the flutter in his stomach, and that he softly touched his lips afterwards, in some kind of fondness.

* * *

Amora disappeared again, but Thor stayed in Midgard, just in case. 

He's shocked as he counts the days on a letter from home, and realizes that he still has five months in Midgard time until Loki is supposed to come home from Jötunheimr.

Come home. The words sit heavy in his brain. Is home Asgard for Loki? Definitely not. Could Asgard be home for Loki? Thor couldn't say anything, but he doubts.

Thor had explained it to the Avengers.

"Five months?" Tony had said. "Are you kidding me? We need Loki to catch that fucker now."

"Well, she hasn't caused any real trouble since the strip mall," Bruce had said, trying to mediate.

"I have no right to take away Loki's time from his family. I'm sorry that it has become inconvenient for you," said Thor.

Clint took a double take. "Was Thor just sarcastic?" he asked.

"I am capable of being sardonic," Thor muttered, which just made the archer laugh.

"Can we try to stay on topic?" Natasha sighed.

* * *

Loki tried not to think about the little slip he'd received from Býleistr. It was a note that had but one sentence on it, and he tried to not thing of it as some sort of perverse blessing. 

  
_Perhaps he would be good for you_ it read. 

Come with it had been a little baggy with crushed up powder in it. With a sniff, Loki had realized what it was.

Seduction drugs. 

Tasteless, but with a stiff aroma that one with a trained nose in potions could recognize. But Geirni was not trained in potions, was he?

It had taken Loki a long time to pluck up the courage. He knew why Býleistr had sent it--Býleistr, while he treated Loki like porcelain, had a callous hand towards commoners at times. A callous hand to anyone outside the family, really. There was an unwritten underlying message in the note Loki could determine. Take what you wish, brother, you may be a runt but you're a prince.

Loki had bought a stick of butter for the first time since arriving in town. It was a rare commodity that only the rich like the lord of the town bought, but Loki had gotten his hands on it.

He cut up Geirni's evening bread and dusted the seductives on the pieces, before slathering them with butter to cover the smell and the sight.

His stomach churned a little as he watched Geirni eat. "What's wrong, Loki?" Geirni asked.

"Oh, just feeling a mite heady," Loki replied. "Long day."

"Of course," Geirni smiled. Loki watched his pupils slowly dilate as he ate. The effects wouldn't wear off until Loki gave him the other dose. 

After Geirni had eaten, Loki leaned forward and kissed him. Hard, not as he had the night before, but he kept the kiss closed mouth as to judge Geirni's initial reaction.

When Loki pulled away, Geirni pulled him back. The seductives had done their job.

Loki had pulled away again, and took Geirni back into the sleeping room, straddling Geirni's stomach. He let Geirni tangle his fingers in his hair as he kissed all along Geirni's rough fishhook scars, Geirni's eyes fluttering shut.

Geirni's hand traced along the outlines of the cut he had given Loki only a week before, his finger tracing lightly over the scabs and the angry skin bordering them, tight and shiny. Loki shuddered under the gentle touch, and he bent to kiss Geirni on the lips again.

Geirni was noticeably quiet in his receptiveness, but Loki didn't let that discourage him. 

He touched everywhere, as if he wanted to commit those messy scars to memory.

And he took everything Geirni had. His mind. His decency. And even his virginity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ANGST.
> 
> And now both Loki and Thor have done something terrible--to each other and the people around them.
> 
> And I say: POOR GEIRNI.
> 
> One more note, I have a new WIP up on my profile. It's called "Improbably, Yes". You should take a peek.


	35. The Depravity of the Monarchy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter, long wait. That's the long way around, I'm sorry. I'll explain at the bottom.

When Geirni woke up, he was sore. He moved his leg awkwardly, wincing from the pain in his nethers. He blinked in the early morning light, looking around the narrow sleeping quarters. Loki lay next to him, in the nude, an arm wrapped around Geirni's neck that Geirni had not noticed before.

Geirni got up and tried to rearrange his clothes. His loincloth was undone, and his fingers fumbled as he retied the knot and tried to settle it comfortably on his hips. He was not able to find comfort in it, and only managed to ruffle and distress the knot.

He sighed, and walked into his main room, his shoulder bumping against the wall. Strange. Geirni had never had issue with running into things before.

He pulled out the bread and the cutting board, setting the bread on the board shakily. He tried to grip the knife, but he failed. He awkwardly began to cut into the bread with his half grip, cursing all the way.

Loki woke up a few minutes later. He quickly retied his own loincloth and pulled his hair back, and walked into the main room.

It had been evident that Geirni's body had become confused. A chair was toppled over in his wake, and his cloth was twisted and looked like it was about to come undone. He was trying to grip the knife, but his fingers faltered and every time he rose the knife, he couldn't hit the same spot twice, and it was obvious that Geirni was becoming frustrated.

Loki realized then. An adverse reaction.

The rest of the powder was supposed to reverse the effects, he thought. Would it cure Geirni, or only make him worse, if Geirni proved to be reacting to the drugs wrong.

It was the only lead Loki had, he realized.

"Geirni," he said. "Sit down."

"Oh, good morning Loki," Geirni said in a tired voice. He followed Loki's directions (missing the chair on the first time) though, and Loki looked at him closer. His eyes looked sore and the skin beneath them was dark. Geirni's skin was hot, far too hot to the touch.

"You're sick," said Loki.

"No I'm not," Geirni insisted.

Loki walked over to the cloak, and picked out the package that held the rest of the powder. "Here," he said. "It'll help your balance."

"No," Geirni said, batting away Loki's hands.

" _Geirni,_ " Loki snarled, and the other stiffened, opening his mouth. Loki poured the powder out of the bag and into Geirni's mouth, who choked on it at first and complained, but Loki gave him a truly fearsome look, and Geirni shut his mouth and worked for a moment to swallow it all.

For a moment, Geirni looked as if Loki had only made the situation worse as he had feared, and Loki started to worry as Geirni looked past him vacantly. Suddenly, Geirni flinched. His voice changed, dropping low and gravely, and he said, " _I was right about you._ "

"Geirni, please, forgive me," Loki pleaded.

"You're just a selfish, spoiled brat. I was right. Nothing you do is for others. It's all for yourself." Geirni snarled.

"Geirni, please..."

"What, do you still feel as if I owe you something? Prince?" He spat out the word. "You don't care for this realm at all, or your people."

"I care so much about this realm..."

"You care about yourself," Geirni straightened, and stood. "If you cared about us, you wouldn't have raped me."

"Geirni..." he pleaded.

"No, no forgiveness. That was cheap, Loki. You hurt me, you used me, all because that Asgardian brat gave you a bit of a libido." Geirni gripped the back of the chair and glared at Loki. "Get out of my house."

"You can't order me to do anything," Loki said weakely.

"I said, 'get out of my house.'"

Loki skittered away, grabbing his bag and cloak. He reached into the pocket as Geirni looked away. Geirni expected something terrible, but all Loki did was pull out his knife and rip his way into the palace, at his dam's feet.

"Loki?" said Laufey as his middle son materialized from thin air and fell on his knees on the hard floor.

"I've done something terrible, my dam," said Loki, licking his lips and struggling to his feet.

"What have you done?" Laufey whispered, getting up from his throne and kneeling down to touch his son gently on the shoulder.

"I remembered I was a prince, but forgot I was still a mere Jötunn as well," said Loki, trying to start to pick up his belongings that had ended up in disarray all over the floor.

Laufey stopped Loki from picking up his things. "What did you do to that poor peasant?"

"I may have given his seductives my little brother sent me... and they may have given him a bad reaction..." said Loki, suddenly sounding like a child for the first time in so many centuries.

Laufey's lips curled and he snarled, "Get out of here. I can't stand the sight of you now."

Loki scrambled to pick up his things he'd managed to take with him, and he ran out of the throne room as quickly as he could, almost tripping when he got to the archway.

Laufey sat back down and slumped in his seat, gripping his horns tight as he held back a scream of frustration. Since when had his children thought illegal seductives were okay? When had he made that mistake.

The servants could tell when he was angry, and all avoided the room as Laufey King stalked about and paced, his hands curled into tight angry fists, his skin turning gray across the muscles of his hands like it always did now on the joints of his fingers and the wrinkled flesh of his elbows.

That's it, he decided, everyone had to come back. His youngest was in quite enough trouble too, (as he was the one who actually dealt Loki the seductives) and he'd need reinforcements for the both of them.

Laufey walked out of the throneroom, and yelled at the nearest guard, "Get messenger boys!"

* * *

 

Sæhildr worked alongside his brother in silence as they collected the prince's things that had still been strewn around Geirni's cottage. Geirni had stumbled into the town center vomiting that evening, after locking himself in the cottage all day. He had a violent fever, and had spent two weeks dry heaving anything they tried to feed him and hi own fluids after that, blood, bile, all over the snow.

Just as quickly as the drugs had given Geirni the illness, it went away without prompting two weeks later. Geirni looked thinner after the ordeal, and paler, and his hands still shook with the effects of the seductives that had impaired him.

They had gone back to cottage today after keeping Geirni in the town center through his illness. The prince had left books and stones and money hanging around the cottage, and so far it seemed none were coming for them, and Geirni had decided he wanted it all gone. The money was swept away and put in the town center to hold onto in case of another famine. 

Sæhildr and Geirni were sweeping up the other belongings, and once they figured they had it all the armful of books, spices and magic stones were carried to a pit in the village center, where a group had collected.

Everyone knew what the prince had done to Geirni by now, the gossip spread like wildfire. Sweet, innocent little Geirni.

A Jötunn stepped out of the horde in the square, and after a moment of fumbling set the prince's belongings a light.

Sæhildr wrapped his arm around his brother's shoulder, as the people around them began to scream: " _Down with the monarchy!_ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My excuses:
> 
> 1) It's finals time. I actually wrote this chapter instead of studying for my Geometry Regents I take tomorrow... pfft it's not like I was gonna pass it either way.
> 
> 2) I had a lot of trouble putting this chapter together. I had the story, but couldn't find the words.
> 
> 3) Apple wiped my notes, and I kept all the notes I had for my stories on that, with no backups. Oops. Fuck fuck fuck. Updates will be slow on both WIPs until I rewrite those. I'm so so so sorry.
> 
> 4) I was giving my original pieces, The Illusionist and Group Politics some love.
> 
> Once again, I'm sorry everyone. I hope this chapter was better than the last.


	36. Onward the Righteous

"Come on," Sæhildr whispered in his brother's ear as the scream spread from a group of secluded children barely on the cusp of manhood across the entire crowd of villagers. "We do not want to be involved in this ridiculousness."

The two brothers peeled away from their spot in the spotlight and wiggled out of the crowd. "Who started the screaming?" asked Geirni.

"Pállson," sighed Sæhildr.

"Oh," said Geirni quietly. The old Páll had died not long after the return of the Casket, when a promise of food by the royals had not been fulfilled. His son hadn't quite been the same since, and Geirni had gone out of his way to make sure the boy did not cross paths with Loki.

"I remember him, before I left," sighed Sæhildr. "He smiled more."

"Are you sure it was him?" asked Geirni.

"Saw his marks." They both fall silent for a moment. "That was dirty," Sæhildr finally said. "They took a ceremony that was supposed to help you heal and made it about themselves, and their own problems."

"It's in the past now," said Geirni. "Just like what happened."

* * *

 

Within a few days, the rest of the family had returned to the capital. Býleistr and Loki were confined to their rooms.

"He raped someone?" Fárbauti said in disbelief.

"A young masonboy," said Laufey. "Býleistr sent him the drugs, by Yggdrasil, I don't want to know where he got his hands on them in the first place."

"Stupid children," Fárbauti said irritably.

"We were not much different, were we?" Laufey brooded. "I was Býleistr's age when I summoned you to the Ice City, remember? I almost demanded your hand in marriage."

"You struggled," said Fárbauti.

"It does not change the facts," sighed Laufey. "I may have lost both my parents in a vicious uprising, but it doesn't excuse what I did."

"Laufey," said Fárbauti, cupping his lover's cheek, "before I ever took you to bed I loved you. You demanded I marry you, but it mattered not because I learned to love you so quickly."

"It matter's not you loved me," said Laufey, beginning to become irritated. "I set the example."

"You didn't set the example, don't blame yourself," said Fárbauti. "The children know not how we came to become married, only that we met one another on a battlefield."

"How is it," said Laufey, "that it is right I raped you, and not right Loki raped that boy?"

" _You didn't rape me_ ," Fárbauti snarled. "It is entirely different."

"By this logic, could it be that that Æsir get Thor and Loki raped each other?"

"Not now." Fárbauti said angrily, as Laufey pushed him away. "We shouldn't deal with what is in the past and not giving us problems, when we must deal with the present that there is a mason boy six days from Utgard that just had his mind chewed on by our _son._ "

"None of it's right," sighed Laufey. "And you say it's not giving us problems, when Loki has become reckless, illogical, and more self-centered than usual since Thor told him those things?"

"Laufey, you are filling your plate too high," said Fárbauti.

"If you want to ignore what is right, my love, be my guest," said Laufey. "But I shall not."

"You didn't rape me!" yelled Fárbauti, shoving Laufey roughly upon the shoulder.

"I did! Admit it!" screamed the other.

"Fine! You raped me! But every time since, it has been not! It is over!"

"But what, pray tell, do Loki and Thor think?" asked Laufey quietly.

Fárbauti opened his mouth as if he had something to say, but quickly discovered that no, there was nothing.

* * *

 

"Thor?" a voice said, and Thor looked up as if he had been snapped out of some sort of trance from the book he was reading.

The paperback looked battered as it sat in his lap, and Pepper recognized it as Maria Stark's old copy of Shakespeare's sonnets.

"Miss Potts," said Thor politely.

"I've told you before Thor, you can call me Pepper," Pepper said, sitting down in the chair next to Thor as he closed the book and sat it on the end table between the two cushy chairs.

"Lady Pepper," Thor corrected himself.

Alright. Pepper could work with that. "So, Thor, Tony told me about you and Loki's fight. I was wondering if you wanted to talk about it?"

"Not particularly, Lady Pepper," said Thor, starting to look away from as he said it.

"Come on, Thor," said Pepper. "Talking will make you feel better, I promise. Or it'll help the rest of us figure out how to make you feel better."

"Alright," Thor ceded.

"Alright, if you don't mind me asking, how did you two end up married?"

"I'm sure you know it was an arranged marriage," said Thor. "I killed a great many of his people, and to right my wrongs my father gave Loki's people the heart of their land in return for his presence in Asgard."

"How did you feel about it?" asked Pepper.

"I was angry at first," said Thor. "But I realized that Loki was far more upset by it than I was, and I learned to care for him. Finding out it was all one of his plot's was cut me."

"Why were you angry?"

"I was having my youth and my days of courtship and leisure ripped away by a Frost Giant. How would you feel upon being forced to wed a bull?"

"So Loki and his people are like cows to you?" Pepper questioned, her tone hardening.

"No, not like cows... but we do not think the Jötnar equal to us," said Thor. "Not cows. I misspoke."

Pepper was quiet for a moment. "Why did you go through with it?" she finally asked.

"Why would I not?"

"It's your life, isn't it? Couldn't you make it a marriage on paper and run away with other women the moment Loki turned his back."

"I owed it to my people to stay true to Loki and to be his husband," said Thor, "and Loki owed his people the same."

"So it was entirely for your realm's benefit."

"Yes," said Thor.

Pepper thought a moment. "Had you ever met Loki before the wedding?"

Thor paused. "He told me there was once a night he disguised himself and robbed me... but I was too inebriated to remember it. I bashed his brother's skull in once, but no, I came no closer to him until he came to Asgard to marry him."

"You bashed in his brother's head?" Pepper asked incredulously. "Is he still alive?"

"He is alive and well... but no thanks to me. It was a dark period in my life, I have recognized my responsibility since."

"How bad was he hurt?" said Pepper.

"He was comatose for some time... Then when he first awoke he was feared to have been lost. But he recovered since, since the Casket was returned to his realm."

Pepper thinned her lips. "Thor, are you sure the relationship you and Loki share is healthy?"

"What do you mean?" Thor asked.

"Well, it seems like you both only got involved because your realms needed you. It's no wonder you started fighting after you left Earth since the miscarriage, neither of you were in it for love."

"We were in love. Or something like it," said Thor.

"For all the wrong reasons," said Pepper.

"I would wish you to drop the topic," Thor said, picking up his book again.

"Alright," said Pepper. "They just wanted me to talk to you."

"I have had words with you," said Thor. "And now it is over."

"Of course," said Pepper. "Thank you, Thor." She let herself out of the room. Pushing Thor further, with the possibility of really upsetting him, was not a risk she cared to take.

* * *

 

The lighting in the room was dark and limited, as Amora huddled in her rags in a dank old building on the outskirts of some outlying town.

Her breath was quick and heavy as she pressed her dirty hand on her forehead, shuddering with each intake of air, trying to calm herself.

The pain was only in one spot, but it felt like it covered every bit of her body, from the tips of her toes to her forehead. Burning, twisting, hurting.

Her pupils dilated as she felt herself lunge forward, and she found herself at the Other's feet.

With his toe, he tipped her head forward and glared at her. "You're running out of time to redeem yourself," he said, putting his foot back down and grinding it in the ground, which crackled like gravel beneath his feet but felt solid beneath Amora.

"Please, I just need a little more, I need to recover before I can launch a real attack," she pleaded.

"You have as much time as we had agreed upon," the Other snarled, "and no more."

" _Please._ "

With a jolt, Amora opened her eyes and found herself back in the dilapidated little quarters. She curled in on herself, trying to take deep breaths, as somewhere, on the other side of the universe, the Other let the pain fade a bit. But only a bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ouch ouch ouch, author feels here. I ship Fárbauti and Laufey so hard, and having them fighting hurt me D:


	37. The Way

"Sir, Nick Fury has issued an order for the Avengers to assemble on Broadyway," J.A.R.V.I.S.'s cool computerized voice said, drawing Tony's attention from his work.

Tony pushed his reading glasses up on his nose, and said, "What, why?"

"It appears Amora is attacking with a leviathan," said J.A.R.V.I.S. 

"Inform the others," said Tony. "Tell them I'll meet them there." Tony snapped the cuffs on his wrists as he ran up the stairs into the main room and out on the Balcony. The towers mechanism snapped the pieces of the suit onto Tony, and he flew out towards Broadway, where he could see the giant creature smashing into the buildings. "Lot of clean up," Tony muttered.

Once he got there, he identified Amora standing in the street amongst the fleeing civilians. The suits interface zoomed in on her, showing dark bruises blossoming around her eyes. Her back was bent forward a bit too far.

Tony turned his attention from Amora to the leviathan she had brought with her, which was making it's business of causing large amounts of structural damage to the various buildings.

"Tony, are you on?" Natasha's voice suddenly said in his ears. 

"That I am," said Tony.

"We're on our way," said Steve, "Thor should be arriving on scene any second. What's the situation?"

"Amora's got a leviathan destroying New York's art scene, and looks even worse than usual," Tony relayed.

Thor flew past him with Mjölnir, landing on the roof of one of the nearby undamaged building, and Tony could see him fiddling with his ear piece. The guy never could quite figure them out.

"Any Chi'tauri soldiers?" asked Clint.

"Nope."

Tony flew to the building Thor was pacing upon. "Stark!" Thor yelled. "Is Amora attacking directly?"

"No, she isn't. She's just limping around below," said Tony.

"I will take her," Thor declared, taking to the air again and leaving Tony behind. He dropped to the streets, which had mostly been cleared of the fleeing civilians and tourists. "Enchantress!" he shouted, ignoring the tinny chatter of the others coming from his ear piece.

"Thor!" Amora greeted, her voice startlingly clear over all the other noise. "What a pleasure!"

"No more words," said Thor gruffly, raising Mjölnir to strike her.

Amora teleported only a few feet away, laughing as she called forth strings of fire from her hands. "Perhaps I shoulder bring these upon your icy little wife," she trilled, slapping the flames upon the ground and setting a string of debris alright. "The honorless one." She grinned.

"More honor than you!" Thor shouted. 

"Don't let her provoke you," Romanoff's voice said in his ear as Thor screamed and raised Mjölnir. Amora lashed her flames, catching the side of Thor's face and setting his beard to flame.

Thor smothered out the flame with his other hand, gritting his teeth. Somewhere above his head, Tony shot explosives into the mouth of the leviathan.

"Your beard is singed, Thor," said Amora, falling into a peal of laughter. Thor flung Mjölnir again, and the Enchantress jumped out of the way. 

She twirled her hands to materialize some staff from thin air, and started to scream words in some Elven language as she shifted through a short series of positions. She swung the staff towards Thor, and Thor was knocked off his feet by a huge gust of wind that came roaring toward him. 

"The leviathan is down, Thor," said Natasha over his comm as he struggled weakly to his feet in the heavy winds. "Cap and I are coming to assist you."

Thor brought his hand to his ear and pressed the button, hoping it would really work. He said, "Do not engage her, her magic is reckless today."

"It's our job, Thor," came Rogers' reply.

Thor managed to his feet and flung Mjölnir at Amora, which knocked her down after hitting her in the stomach. Thor didn't manage to pin her though, but she did drop the staff, ending the spell that brought out her winds. Amora shrieked and called back the fire.

"Thor!" Natasha shouted, and Thor turned around to see her and Rogers running towards him. In that second, Amora whipped him with her fire again, setting his hair on fire. Thor fell on the ground, attempting to smother out the burns before they spread any further. 

Amora turned her flames on Rogers, who blocked them with his shield. Romanoff fired some shots, but Amora's movements were too wild and they all missed.

That's when Natasha realized--Amora wasn't just crazy, she was tired. Amora teetered a bit as she summoned her staff into her hands, and as Thor put out the fire on his head, Natasha watched Amora's face. The Enchantresses eyes widened, and suddenly she dropped her staff and clutched the back of her head screaming, "Not now, please!" 

With a crack, Amora disappeared, along with five square feet of deep concrete.

* * *

"So, the general consensus right now is Amora is bad, and only getting worse?" Tony said, as the Avengers treated each others minor aches and scrapes from the battle in his kitchen.

Thor was quiet as he gently pressed an ice pack onto Hawkeyes knee.

"Thor, we really need Loki," said Steve.

"Steve's right on it," said Bruce. "I've seen the footage, we can all counter Amora, but not enough to get close enough to her to capture her. That's our problem. Loki can give her everything she's got and more, right?"

Thor sighed. "Loki would be surprised to know she's already so strong."

"Oh come on," said Tony, "we all know by the looks on her face that she doesn't want to be there. There is definitely something else up. Again, Thor, we want Loki."

"So does his family," said Thor.

"Then bring him back to his family after," said Clint. "Who cares about the difference?"

"Thor, we know you're scared about dealing with this. But well be there for you, okay? And for Loki. I'm sure five other people can keep you two from messing up too badly," said Bruce.

"Alright," Thor gave in finally. "I will have Heimdall take us in three days time."

"Thor, do you want us to do something about your singedness?" asked Tony.

Thor tugged on a piece of burnt hair, and it shattered at the pressure. Thor nodded to Tony.

"I'll get the electric razor," said Tony.

* * *

Býleistr and Loki sit next to each other on Býleistr's bed. Both of them have their hands folded in their laps and their heads tipped down when their sire lets himself in, heavy footsteps padding across the floor to look at the two younger sons.

Loki's hair falls in his eyes. Býleistr looks afraid.

"Býleistr,  where did you get illegal seductives?" Fárbauti asked. "I need you to tell the truth."

"They were in Angrboda's stores, along with instructions. I stole them from him," Býleistr said.

"Now, where did either of you two get the idea that, because you are royals, you can mistreat, hurt your common folk?" said Fárbauti.

The princes younger were silent.

"Your dam and I need you to answer this question, children."

Child. Loki visibly shuddered, letting out a deep, broken breath from somewhere inside him.

"Did you learn this in Asgard, Loki?" said Fárbauti.

"No," said Loki.

"You did not?"

"I did not."

"Then tell me--are there any influences at all, or are your dam and I simply as negligent as I suspected?"

Silence.

"Thor will be told of this, Loki." A nod. "Býleistr... We will have Angrboda in the capital, and you will tell him yourself you stole from him." The two are quiet, not daring to look at their sire. "You two raped someone. Yggdrasil knows how Geirni is holding up in his village now, but that is outside of my concern. What is my concern is you have violated him. Who do you think you are, my children?"

Loki fidgeted.

"You are spoiled, that's what you are, my children. Rotten to the core."

Býleistr sniffed.

"But hopefully, you two will manage to grow past that." Fárbauti said. "You will join us for dinner tonight."

* * *

"So, what do we need to bring to Jötunn Land, Thor?" asked Tony.

"Warm clothes, jackets, blankets..." said Thor. "The land is frigid."

"Okay, extra socks and long johns."

"Noted," said J.A.R.V.I.S.

"You alright, Thor? You've been quiet past few days."

"I am well. We leave in the morning, yes?"

"Mhm, eight on the dot Fury decided."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yaaay, I finally figured out how many chapters we're gonna have! The answer is too fucking many.


	38. The Whole Truth and Nothing But the Truth

The next morning, everyone seemed visibly tensed as they ate their breakfast and adjusted everything to get ready to go. Interstellar travel seemed to be the one thing that could freak out even Natasha and Clint a bit, who, had by some measure, just about seen it all.

"So what is Jötunheimr like?" Tony asked Thor.

Thor was the worst off of all, but not for interstellar travel reasons. For once, the big guy didn't eat, and Tony wanted to mark the date. Thor seemed incredibly serious, and he paced around the kitchen wearing into the floor as the others nibbled on toast and drank coffee. "Dark and cold," Thor said. "But it will not storm while we are there, it is summer for them also."

"Are you sure you don't want anything, Thor?" said Bruce, who'd tried to get allowed to stay behind. (Thor insisted that the Frost Giants could hold off the other guy.)

"I am sure."

"Speaking of food, what are they gonna have in Jötunheimr?" asked Clint.

"They will have bread and water for you," said Thor. "They will cook meat if you ask, I believe. They prefer it raw, themselves."

Tony tried to ignore his mental image of Loki digging into raw and still bloody meat. It was way too early for this. "So we should pack snacks?"

Thor's brow wrinkled, and he thought for a moment. "If you should so like." After a while of quiet eating, Thor broke his cool, and said loudly, "Have you all sufficiently broken your fast?"

There were some mumbled agreements as everyone quickly adjusted their things and swallowed the last of their breakfast, following Thor up the elevator to the roof. Tony stepped out onto the balcony and the Iron Man suit was assembled on him, and he flew up to the roof from there.

"So, Thor, you can, y'know, do your thing," said Tony as Thor paced around the roof for a second, the Avengers following him.

Thor finally picked a spot, and as the others sufficiently surrounded him, he barked out, "Heimdall! Open the Bifröst!"

Tony felt a massive lurch as his senses exploded. He shut his eyes tight and couldn't help as his arms and legs folded against his body as much as the Iron Man suit would allow. If forced to describe the Bifrost wormhole, he would say it felt like throwing up whilst being thrown up.

As quickly as it began it was over. Tony felt himself tumble and his limbs sprawl all over the floor as he opened his eyes, blinking around the golden room. The various Avengers around him were sprawled on the floor in various states of dishevelment. Thor was the only one standing, and he nodded to an impossibly tall man who had to be Heimdall.

"Surely you know our purpose," he said in a truly authoritative voice as Tony got to his feet and offered Bruce a hand up.

"I do, Prince," said Heimdall. "Be warned, I can see not what has transpired upon Jotunheimr in your absence from Loki prince."

"Then I will have to see," said Thor.

"Very well," said Heimdall, his gloved hand's tightening around a sword stuck in a lever.

"Come," Thor ordered the Avengers, walking over to another side of the Bifrost. They all followed, a little more haggard than they had on Earth, and Heimdall pushed the sword forward, and it was the exact same sensation again, except this time Tony could feel the cold, even through the life support systems of his suit.

"Brr," Clint observed as everyone got off their hands and knees and took a good look around.

"Happy place we got here," said Tony. The skyline was very dark, and the buildings around them were low and worn. Empty.

"They will come," Thor assured, looking west towards a large, fort like building. "This part of the city has been uninhabited since the capital moved here."

"All fun," said Tony, wiggling his toes inside his boots. He marveled at how Thor was still sleeveless, even though Thor did look a little uncomfortable in the cold.

Everyone jumped a little as a figure appeared at the end of the street. Thor led them forward, to a hulking beast of a creature. He seemed humanoid, Tony figured. His skin was a dark blue, and his body was covered everywhere with scars in intricate lines. His stomach was swelled slightly. One of his eyes was blacked out and bruised purple, and didn't open as wide as the other did. "Helblindi," Thor greeted, his voice suddenly softer and more applied.

The frost giant said in an achingly low voice, "Odinson."

"These are the Avengers," said Thor. "We have come to seek Loki." He turned to the Avengers. "Friends, allow me to introduce you to Helblindi, the Crown Prince of Jötunheimr and Loki's brother."

Tony bit down his sarcastic hello, because you just didn't say that to hulking masses of muscle twice the size of Thor.

Natasha saved the day. "Greetings," she said.

Helblindi tipped his head toward her and grunted, or he may have said something in return, Tony had trouble understanding him.

Helblindi led them all through the city. They turned a street that was somewhat quiet, with only a few Jötunns hanging around. Conversations he heard were whispered, and many stared at the odd congregation of foreigners who graced the streets.

"Not many outsiders come to Jötunheimr," Thor said quietly. "And it is very early morning here."

"It was early morning when we left," Tony said to himself, turning off his microphone first.

They got closer to the huge fort like complex, and gates opened before Helblindi, closing behind him. "My dam has not yet woken, but he will see you when he does," assured Helblindi. He led them through a large hall and into a small side room. There was a dark stone built fire place, very clean, as if it'd never been used, and a large pile of furs that would have had the animal right's activists screaming back on Earth. "I regret to say it, but I cannot set a fire for you," said Helblindi, "and neither may any of those with us at the moment."

"Of course," said Thor. "The furs will suffice for a time. Will you bring bread for my friends, Helblindi prince?"

"I will send a servant," said Helblindi, stepping out of the room and sliding the door shut.

"Well," said Tony, popping off his face piece. "Jötunheimr is... nice."

"This is hospitable for them," Thor said, as a servant pushed aside the curtain with a precarious tray with cut up chunks of unappetizing brown bread. The servant was about Natasha's height, with his skin unscarred except for some lines on his forehead that looked natural.

Thor dug into his armor for a moment, removing something and setting it in the boys hand. Tony figured coinage, as the servant looked in his cupped hands and broke into a huge, innocent grin. He dropped in a bow that revealed more under his loincloth than Tony really wanted to see, and said, "Thank you, Æsir!"

"You're welcome, child," Thor said dismissively, taking a hunk of the Jötunn bread and staring at it for a moment. He put it back down.

Steve, too his credit, took a bit and took a large bite. "Yum," he forced, chewing on it for a long time. "Filling?" he tried.

Natasha pulled out one of the huge furs, pulling it over herself. Clint joined her beneath it. He had a hat on his head, and the ski cap along with the huge white fur and his entirely serious expression was a little off putting.

The Avengers forced talk and shivering until the curtain was pushed aside again, and a new huge figure stepped in. His red eyes looked tired and weary, and jewelry just dripped from him, gold splayed all over his body from various piercings and necklaces. "Laufey king," said Thor, standing from his spot on the floor and bowing.

"It is not needed, Odinson," said Laufey, shaking his head and sitting on one of the large, Jötunn sized chairs that the Avengers had neglected. "Why have you come? The Asgardian summer is not yet over."

"Laufey king," Thor said with utmost respect, "the people of Midgard have dire need of Loki's skills."

"Explain," Laufey rumbled. His voice was clearer than his sons.

"Well, your highness," Steve jumped in, "The Enchantress Amora is attacking our people on Midgard, and we need someone else who can practice magic to help us."

"Loki cannot," said Laufey.

"Shouldn't Loki decide for himself?" asked Natasha. "He's an adult, isn't he?"

"Loki is an adult but he will always be my child," said Laufey. "And children act out, as Loki has."

"What has Loki done?"

"Perhaps you should ask him, Odinson," said Laufey. "You remember where his rooms are."

"I do. But you can have someone light a fire for these mortals?"

"I shall find a mage."

* * *

 

Thor followed the route back to Loki's rooms. He pushed aside the curtain, and found Loki curled up on the bed, Helblindi beside him. Both snoozed softly. At the sound of footsteps, Loki fidgeted and blinked his eyes open. "Thor?" he said in a sleep addled voice, which made Helblindi stir next to him.

"Your father told me I must ask you why you cannot make decisions for yourself."

"Why are you here?"

"Not of importance, the mortals shall explain it themselves."

"That's not very helpful," Loki clicked his tongue as Helblindi pulled himself into a sitting position.

"Loki, what have you done?"

Loki sighed, and shifted uncomfortably, as Helblindi finally got himself to full attention as he looked nervously between the two.

"Well?" asked Thor.

"Well, it was rather inappropriate, you don't discuss it in polite company..."

"Loki," growled Thor, and Loki froze.

"He raped a commoner," said Helblindi bluntly. He curled his arm around his younger brother's shoulder. "It was..." he searched for a word for a moment. "Bad."

"Depraved," Loki said gravely.

Thor couldn't find his words for a moment, either. His eyes bulged and he managed to say, "Loki... how—how?"

"Well it wasn't especially hard. He wasn't intelligent." Helblindi smacked Loki on the back of the head.

"Loki," he growled.

"That's just... that's sick," Thor said, his fist curling around Mjölnir as a truly dark expression took over his face.

Helblindi whispered something to Loki, who skittered out of the back and into the washroom. "Thor, is this worth the loss of the peace?"

"Didn't I already lose it?" Thor said through gritted teeth.

"No, you haven't, as far as the Jötnar are concerned. Please, Thor, try to put it aside. Loki has paid for what he has done. Our family as paid Wergild. Geirni has shown recovery."

"So that's how rape is treated in Jötunheimr. As a mild transgression."

"Of course not," said Helblindi. "Thor, when you left Loki was convinced the marriage was over!"

"Maybe he should have waited to hear from me!"

"Maybe you should have written back," said Helblindi is words pretty and neat. "The past is the past, but the future isn't written yet. Let it be peaceful."

"But what Loki has done..."

"Loki has paid, our family has paid for this transgression and loss of our pride. Let what happens in Jötunheimr be the business of the Jötnar alone."

"Then Loki has still sullied our marriage."

"Loki has no need or time for mortals without his ties to you."

Thor swallowed his anger, feeling as if there was an egg in his throat.

* * *

 

Loki found himself sitting in a room with the Avengers two hours later.

Tony could see the tension between the two. Thor looked straight up _pissed_ , and Loki was skittish, shying away from Thor every time Thor looked away from him.

Okay, something was up. But they could work on that later.

"Why need you disturb my time with my family?" asked Loki.

"You were wrong," said Natasha.

"I was wrong. I'm wrong about many things, spider."

"You were wrong about Amora. You said months, probably a year. She's back already. She has been."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long chapter! More passive aggressive relationship fuckery!


	39. Another Betrayed

Thor came back later, whilst he knew the Avengers were bargaining with Laufey to get around Loki's house arrest. Privately, Thor thought it probably wasn't a good thing that Loki was being squirmed out of his punishment, but Midgard needed him.

He found Loki sitting on his bed with a book that looked a little bit too large for him. "Loki," said Thor, "Would I speak with you?" Loki shrugged. "Without your brother looming over me?"

"Perhaps," said Loki. "Would I regret if he didn't?"

"If I were to be uncivil, it would get us nowhere," Thor declared.

"Very well then," said Loki. He shut the large book and set it aside. "Perhaps you would like to walk?"

"That seems well," said Thor. He offered a hand to Loki, who took it gently as he slid off the bed and onto his feet. "Where would you mean to lead me?"

"About the courtyard, perhaps?" said Loki. He dropped Thor's hand and led them out of the room.

Thor said, "Do not doubt that I am angry with you."

"I never did," Loki said lightly.

"Good," said Thor. "But... Neither of us want our marriage to fail."

"True," said Loki, his eyes downcast. "I regret and yet I do not. I have a hard time understanding things I do sometimes." He paused. "I have never told any this."

Thor took a closer look at Loki. There were healing cuts on his lower back, and strands of hair woven with jewels fell in his eyes. Thor brushed them aside. "Neither of us have been particularly responsible in making this work," Thor mediated. Loki was quiet. "I am angry, but I want to make this work," said Thor. "Are you willing?"

"Of course," breathed Loki.

"Alright... Er, I apologize for telling you you never deserved my child," said Thor. "It was out of line, especially because I knew exactly how much it would hurt you."

Loki looked down again, his dark eyelashes splaying on his cheeks. "I am sorry for having... raped that boy. I am sorry for being unfaithful. I am sorry for being terrible."

"Now that we are sorry," Thor said thoughtfully. "Perhaps we should work on progress."

"None ever called you tactile," Loki said snidely.

"Hmm... I would like it if you stopped insulting me," said Thor. "What would you like?"

"The respect of your people," said Loki. "And... yours."

"Mine," said Thor. "I had not considered I did not offer it to you, Loki."

"You were always... distant. It had me lonely. I had little to occupy me in Asgard." Loki said, the strands of hair falling back in front of his eyes.

"I felt that you did not want company," said Thor. "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry for not telling you. And for being cold," said Loki.

"There is a lot we must learn about being spouses," said Thor. "Perhaps we should wait on trying for another child, until we learn to be better."

"No," said Loki. "Let there be a child, let him teach us to be better."

They fell into a comfortable silence as they continued their walk, Loki's chill hands taking Thor's hesitantly.

* * *

 

"I need to see my father!" Loki called, pushing through the much taller than he guards with Thor, and oddly enough, the good doctor Bruce Banner trailing behind.

"Prince, aren't you supposed to have appointments with him now?" a guard asked.

"Do I look like I care, Ulfrson?" Loki snapped, throwing his hair over his shoulders. "Let me see him!"

The Jötunn grumbled but stepped aside, opening the door for Loki to plow through into the throne room. "Loki," said Laufey irritably, "I am _speaking_ with someone!"

"He can wait!" Loki trilled. "I'm leaving with the Avengers for Midgard!"

"No, you are not!" Laufey said, waving off the Jötunn he'd been speaking with, who was understandably eager to get out of the way of the family feud in progress.

"And why?" asked Loki.

"You have done wrong, and you will pay the price for that," said Laufey. Bruce quaked in his socks a little, as the two Jötnar stared each other down.

"Must Midgard pay the price?" asked Loki.

"What?"

"Midgard is still my responsibility, is it not?" Loki went on, "I don't believe you ever formally absconded me of the duty I was assigned to it when we lost the war."

"Perhaps you must learn what happens when you do wrong, and how it hurts others," said Laufey, curling his fingers tightly around the arm rest of his throne. His face had contorted, leaving hard creases as he scowled upon his child.

"Father, are we going to let thousands of mortals die for a _peasant_?" Loki said.

"Since when do you care for the mortals?" intoned Laufey.

Everyone was quiet for a moment. Thor had watched, the most quiet and attentive Bruce had ever seen him, his lips thinned. Loki and Laufey stilled stared each other down, the height difference only magnified as Laufey stood to his full height up upon the dais, but Loki stood his ground, his back straight and his shoulders squared.

In that moment, it seemed that Laufey noticed that the others were in the room at all. He slowly lifted his head and looked past his disobedient son, his eyes falling hard upon Thor, but lightening upon Bruce. "You are the healer, are you not?" said Laufey.

"I'm a doctor, yes," said Bruce.

"I was told about how you helped heal people, in wild parts of Midgard. It is an admirable profession."

Bruce was surprised. So Laufey didn't know that he was the reason that Loki wasn't pregnant with Thor's kid? Bruce was surprised. Loki had seemed to have wanted no part of him when he had left Midgard, but Bruce knew that much had happened in Jötunheimr, and that maybe he was just the last thing really on Loki's mind.

Loki looked at Bruce as if he'd hardly noticed he'd been there before. His eyes narrowed a bit. But he didn't correct Laufey, didn't say, "No, he's the berserker," why didn't he? Why had Laufey known Bruce was a doctor in the first place? Laufey hadn't even said a word to Bruce when the other's were in here before, trying to convince him to send Loki back.

… Thor. Thor must have said he was a doctor when he had brought forth the Avengers, when Thor alone had first pleaded with Laufey. Loki had never said there was another side to Bruce than the Hulk.

"I do," said Bruce softly.

"Tell me, Midgardian, what has Amora wrought upon your people?" asked Laufey.

"Well, it isn't a full scale attack, just lots of collateral damage whenever she pops up, and people are getting very, ah, frightened. We think Loki might be able to actually detain her and send her back to Asgard to be tried, seeing as we've failed to do that, uh, six times?"

"And why do you think Loki wouldn't turn upon you after doing so? What gives you that thought? Loki may be bound to it, but he has no love for Midgard."

"Thor trusts him," said Bruce, "and we think we can trust Thor."

"That's surprising," Loki broke in.

"I was wrong before," Thor said quietly.

Laufey was quiet for a moment, and even though Bruce wouldn't call himself an expert on Jötnar expressions, it looked like Laufey had actually softened a bit.

"Leave me to my thoughts," said Laufey.

The trio stepped out of the throne room as a dark look settled back over Laufey. "Go back to the warm room, mortal," hissed Loki, waving in the general direction.

Bruce nodded calmly and quickly left the scene. Loki looked at Thor, before grabbing him by his shoulder and dragging him away, into an empty sitting room. Loki whispered, "My dam will not let me go."

"How are you sure?" Thor asked.

"I know him well enough, he is only buying himself time. Listen, get your mortal chums to the Bifröst site. I will meet you there."

"Wouldn't you be breaking the law?" asked Thor.

Loki grinned impishly, before remembering he was still rather angry with Thor. "My legal debts are paid to the peasant," he said callously. "I am only held here by familial obligation. But once we are left of Jötunheimr, my dam no longer holds power over me. I am an adult."

"How are you going to escape undetected?" asked Thor.

"Don't you think I know the secret passages of my own castle?" Loki grinned.

* * *

 

Loki walked calmly upstairs to his room upon siccing Thor on the Avengers to get them to the Bifröst site. The Avengers were welcome to leave when they should like, (and probably were encourage to get out heartily) and Thor likely would have enough sense to convince them to be casual.

Loki pulled on his best cloak upon reaching his chambers, and went through his things he needed. He set the Ripping Knife in its sheath in the cloak, along with other plain metal throwing knives. In went his smaller journal, along with a small healing stone and a handful of gold coins. A quick charm lifted the weight and the site of the cloak from his back, so it weighed upon his mind instead.

Loki took a glance across the hallways as he stepped out of his rooms, and started walking towards the end. He walked with more purpose now, and after tipping his head to a servant and waiting for the Jötunn to get out of site, he leaned against the wall and muttered a string of words, falling through the icy bricks into the secret hallway.

He jumped upon hearing Helblindi's voice. "I knew you would try, brother," said Helblindi quietly.

Helblindi stood at the top of the staircase, the bottom of which dropped off in a dank old tunnel that would lead Loki to any corner of Utgard if he kept his way in his head. "Try?" said Loki, "I intend to go."

"You know I can't let you do that," said Helblindi. "No matter what, eh, affection you feel for these mortals, you have a familial obligation."

"I also have a spousal obligation," said Loki. "You don't know about that anymore, do you?"

Helblindi stiffened at the sharp refrain, and Loki immediately felt guilty, but not guilty enough to stop the smooth slide of seidr words over his tongue. Helblindi stiffened as his limbs lost all feeling and ability to move. "It wears off quick, I promise," said Loki, before he descended the stair case at a run.

* * *

 

"Where is Loki?" Tony Stark complained. "I want off this miserable rock."

Thor did not debuff Tony's complaint, and only said, "Loki will come. Do not be weary."

Natasha sighed loudly, watching her breath in the air. They were all anxious and cold again, and Natasha swore just about every bit of her was frostbitten. It was worst than the time she'd burnt her feet on a mission.

At least this time she didn't need to wear heels. Shoving her blue toes into pumps was more torturous that a lot of treatments she'd been subjected to sit through.

Thor stiffened. "He's coming."

"Do you have a brain bond or something?" Tony asked.

Sure enough, Loki slithered out from behind some decrepit old home, and said, "fast."

"Heimdall!" Thor barked.

* * *

 

When they had arrived, Loki had disappeared to the rooms Thor had taken to inhabiting, and had commanded J.A.R.V.I.S. to lock Thor out. Loki had taken off his cloak and stowed his possessions in one of the numerous empty cupboards of Thor's room.

After that, he switched into his Æsir form, and found that it still wore gray industrial garb from the time spent in the compound. He rooted around in Thor's room, and found drawers full of Midgardian garments. Thor's clothes were long enough for him, but were still too large sideways. Loki waved at the pants that hung far too loosely at his hips, and felt them tighten to fit him. He left the gray t-shirt as was.

He took his hair out of its knots, and noted that his hair in his Æsir form had grown as well. When he'd last been in this form, it had reached the middle of his neck, but now it hung messily to almost his shoulders. Grumbling, he found a comb of sorts in Thor's washroom, and he combed out the tangles and brushed the hair back. There was little round ties littered over the counter, so Loki used one of these to hold the hair back behind his neck.

A knock on the door as he entered the main room disrupted Loki. "So, uh, are you just gonna lock yourself in there forever?" Tony Stark's voice came from behind the wood.

Loki walked up to the door and opened it. He said, "No."

Stark obviously wasn't expecting Loki to actually open the door, and he stumbled as it opened before regaining his balance. "Well, hello there, princess," he said. "You're looking charming."

"No words," Loki said callously. "You can record things to be viewed later, yes? You showed us last time."

"You mean videos?" Stark intoned.

"I care not what I mean. Have you any of Amora's latest attacks?" Loki asked.

"Yeah, sure I do. Come with me, I can show them to you in an office."

Tony led Loki down a floor and into a smaller room with a desk that had some papers littered around it, but none seemed to have much of a proper purpose from what Loki could discern.

"J.A.R.V.I.S.," said Tony. "Play the footage on Amora's attacks since the one with the Chi'tauri."

"Have you paper I may use, mortal?" said Loki, as a screen behind the desk lit up with a messaged that said "CLASSIFIED" at the top.

Tony handed Loki a pen and a notebook from the writing desk. The first attack began to play, and Loki took notes, writing in the same runes Tony had seen Thor jotting notes in, but where Thor's were big and clumsy, Loki's were tiny and concise, and actually rather appealing. The longer Tony looked, the more they began to look like actual words.

" _Weak reactions to auditory stimuli,_ " the paper read. Next to it, Loki had written, " _Sluggish non-verbal execution,_ ". After a moment, Tony realized that there was no way Loki used those words himself.

"Hey," said Tony. "How come the allspeak translates your writing, but not Thor's?"

"Because nobody can read Thor's writing but himself," said Loki absently, writing something else down on the lines.

"You know, I wouldn't expect you to be a rapist," said Tony.

"Neither did my family," said Loki.

"Just so you know, we're not okay with it."

"Neither am I," said Loki.

"So why'd you do it?"

Loki was quiet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if this will be my last update before then or not (depends how chapter 40 treats me) but on July 14th I'll be leaving and will be internet and computerless for two weeks. 
> 
> So, if I don't update again this week, I'll see you all in August! xx


	40. Affectionately

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh, hey guys. Lets not ramble about how much I hate work and life and just say: everything exploded. Here's a chapter.

For what he was, the Avengers could not deny that Loki was a productive person. While Thor took to loafing in between tasks, Loki was always busy with something, be it studying, or writing, or practicing spells on the roof top (which Tony was getting way to many calls about, and had to move Loki's spell casting to a lab room instead).

In fact, Loki was studying the lay out of infrastructure in New York City on a StarkPad that he'd taken to rather quickly when Tony got a call from Phil Coulson.

"Guys, Amora's tearing up Staten Island."

"Do we have to?" Clint said over a game on his iPad (the traitor). "It's not like anyone ever remembers Staten anyways." He picked up a Dorito from his bowl and crunched it loudly.

"We have to," said Steve. "Go get changed."

Amora had turned it into such a routine that the Avengers suited up and assembled in Staten in less than twenty minutes. Most astonishing to Tony was how Thor and Loki changed from sweat pants to full chain mail and armor in ten minutes, but that was questions for later as they descended upon the street where Amora was tearing Victorian homes straight from the ground with wide, gold stripes of magic.

"Do you know what spell she's using?" Thor whispered to Loki.

"No," said Loki, "Whatever she is doing is foreign to me."

A messy evacuation was still going on, and Loki was unnerved by all the rustlings of bodies around him. He narrowed his eyes as he looked upon Amora, trying to unravel what magic she was using from her visible cues.

What Loki could tell was, that like in the tapes he had watched, Amora's spellcasting was sloppy. The magic itself had a bit of a weak, trembling quality to it, and visible frustration was etching itself upon Amora's face. "I'm guessing its Álf magic," Loki finally said. "Maybe Svartálf, but the visual qualities are more likely light."  
"So, whatcha gonna do about it?" came Stark's voice from Loki's ear piece. Stark was flying above Amora, cat calling her and generally trying to be a distraction, to keep her from digging very expensive houses out of the ground. Stark was not firing any of his fiery explosions upon Amora yet, because of the mortals who had yet to leave the area, but they were quickly emptying out.

"I have to find a counterspell—" said Loki, but was cut off when one of Amora's spells hit him hard on the chest. He was thrown backgrounds and hit the ground headfirst, rolling back several feet before his body crumpled on the ground.

"Is he okay?" voices and inquiries started coming through the earpiece, all asking just about the same question. Thor ran to where Loki lied, and hauled him to his feet. Loki's hand came to his forehead, his eyes still watching Amora who had turned her wrath upon another one of the homes.

"I'll be fine," said Loki, grinding his teeth together. "But she won't."

Loki collected his efforts and felt the world become a little lighter as he started to lift up from the ground. He quickly took control of his magic and geared himself for flight. It was a skill he seldom used, for he found the magic draining, but there was no way he could easily fight Amora from the ground, where he was in her range but she was out of his.

"Back again?" Amora trilled, her voice high and shrill. It was the first she had spoken in the battle, besides ragged shrieks.

"Like I never left," said Loki. He thrust a beam of energy at the Enchantress, vaguely noticing Steve Rogers' tinny voice in his ear informing him that all the civilians were gone from the scene.

Amora dodged Loki's shot, just as Stark flew up behind her and shot one of his own beams upon the Enchantress. Amora glared and bared her teeth, dissolving right before she was hit and appearing again to Loki's side.

" _What the hell is this?_ " Came Barton's voice, and Loki looked down to see the streets below crawling with slow moving corpses.

"Zombies?" said Romanoff, and the same time that both Thor and Loki said, "Draugar."

Loki turned his attentions to Amora, who appeared to be greatly exhausted. "That tired you out, didn't it?" he said. "Turning mortals into draugar."

Amora's flight was a bit wobbly, but she steeled herself and retaliated without words but with a bang, sending a compressed beam of energy at him that exploded upon hitting Loki's breastplate. He was thrown backwards and hit the side of one of the upturned homes, giving him a moment to take in the streets and give instruction, pressing the little button on his ear piece. "Attack from afar," he instructed, "They are as strong as Thor is, and in proximity they'll drive you mad or eat you alive. And they can see your attacks coming."

"I like regular zombies better," came Barton's voice, and in the distance Loki could see Barton send arrows into the hordes from above.

Loki hauled himself to his feet before any of the draugar took notice of him, and took flight again.

Amora was still faltering and trying to get her balance back as Loki ignored his seid and chose to physically attack her instead. He grabbed sorceress and slammed her to the ground, on one of the evacuated streets that the draugar had not reached, with no one else around.

Amora clawed at the pavement and tried to kick out Loki's body from above her, but Loki stood his ground, allowing his hands to take on their jötunn form, his fingers growing out a bit longer and spidery wrapped around Amora's wrist.

Amora shrieked as her skin burned and blistered, turning black. With one well place kick to his hip bone in her shoes, she finally threw Loki off of herself and his hands away from her wrist, which looked a gruesome sight as Amora's face was wrenched with pain. She looked away for a second as Loki got to his feet and worked to concentrate his power, and watched as her eyes widened and she dissolved from reality.

"She's gone," Loki said into his ear piece. "At least, I think."

"No sign from here," said Rogers, "Where are you, Loki?"

"Side street, I'm on my way."

From the ground, the hordes of draugar weren't as numerous as Loki had originally thought them to be, although many were already slaughtered by the Avengers. Thor seemed to have shown that taking the corpses apart was the only effective way of killing them, and the Avengers were making quick work of the draugar.

"There's going to be some in the houses," Loki supplied into his ear piece. "They seem contained to just this one street though. But they'll go in the houses, because draugars horde treasure."

It took several hours to check every home within the perimeter that Amora had attacked. They found a total of thirty draugars inside homes, and all the corpses were dismantled. Further inspection showed that Amora had summoned the draugar from a nearby Jewish cemetery. The corpses were identified to the officials best abilities, and they were formally put back to rest.

In all, it was a mess—but Amora was injured, a lot, and that was a victory.

* * *

 

Loki was quiet after they got back to the tower. He took his StarkPad and his notes off of the common room coffee table and went back to the rooms he shared with Thor, and somehow he looked a bit smaller than usual. Which, while considering he was a runt, but a runt from a race of giants, still wasn't all that small, but was somehow a discouraging sight.

Thor followed Loki up. Loki had disappeared into the bedroom when Thor arrived in their parlor area, but his things were thrown on the couch and ignored. Thor set some food in their refrigerator, and pushed open the door to their bedroom.

Loki lay on the bed, staring out the window.

"What is it?" Thor asked, sitting down on the bed and resting a hand on Loki's shoulder.

"I don't care to hurt people anymore," said Loki. "I've hurt Geirni, I've hurt my brother, I've hurt you."

"Loki..." Thor searched his thoughts for a moment. "Hurts can be forgiven. I forgive you, your brother will forgive you, he adores you. "

"And of Geirni."

"He's a peasant," Thor trailed off.

"That's exactly the problem!" said Loki. "That's what is wrong with me! I categorize people into scales of importance—I can do anything to anyone who means nothing! That's wrong!" Thor stilled, his hand falling away from Loki's shoulder as Loki sat up. "These mortals... They fight to be equal amongst each other. Our people, our peasants... They don't even try. We've got them convinced they don't need to."

"Then be my queen," said Thor, "and we'll raise new generations in Asgard to all be of equal worth."

"It's not that easy," Loki lamented. "I don't want to hurt Amora, either, but we have to detain her. All she really is is mad."

"Whatever hurts you give her catching her are nothing compared to what she does to herself, or whatever holds power over her does to her."

In this moment, Thor realized that there was something very vulnerable about Loki now. He wasn't crying, but he was tucked into himself, his face just a little bit red and his hair rumpled and ruffled.

Forever unruffled and cool Loki—Thor realized, had finally let down his defenses. Loki let himself be sad around Thor, and it wasn't even a fight. Loki was letting Thor in now.

So Thor scooted closer to Loki, and wrapped his arms around him, pulling him close. His fingers played with Loki's hair and the other arm held him tight, and Thor watched as Loki's eye's fluttered shut and felt all his muscles relax and mold to Thor.

* * *

"Geirni, what's wrong?" said Sæhildr.

Geirni looked grave, every feature set in a frown. "I've missed the red week three times now."


	41. A Liaison

Tony had noticed a couple of things about Thor and Loki.

For one, Loki was harsh. That wasn't to say that Thor wasn't either, because the big guy could flip between sweet and lovable to haughty and reserved with just one bad comment, but in the time Loki had spent with them, Loki was always closed off. Loki had done bad things and Tony wasn't positive that he was all that great of a person either. That probably wasn't good for an arranged marriage.

Another was that Thor and Loki weren't exactly affectionate. Tony hadn't forgotten about the crap that went down last Thor and Loki were together, although they seemed to have worked on it, they definitely weren't on a road to actually loving each other. He thought.

And last, was, with those two, Thor and Loki weren't going to really fix it themselves.

"Here's the thing," he found himself saying to Steve one day in the kitchen. "The battle ground between Asgard and Jötunheimr was Earth, right?"

"Well, Thor said a couple of the fights were about Earth?" said Steve,

"What I'm trying to say, Steve, is, if Loki and Thor fuck it up and Asgard and Jotunheimr go back to war, what if they go back to war here?"

"Well, I don't think Jötunheimr according to Loki has the power for a war—" said Steve.

"Loki said they have their Casket again!" said Tony. "You know, that icy little box that looks kind of like the Tesseract that fucks stuff up?"

"Tony, slow down and _think_ ," Natasha suddenly said.

Tony jumped. "Okay, where did you just come from."

Natasha smiled for just a second, before saying, "I really don't think whatever grudge Loki and Thor's parents have is going to be dragged down here, Tony. But I do think you're right that both Thor and Loki are emotionally compromised."

"Yeah!" Tony said to Steve, "That's what I'm saying!"

Steve rolled his eyes. "So what?" he said. "I really don't think it's our business to be sticking our noses into someone else's intergalactic relationship."

"I mean, as long as Thor and Loki are doing their—whatever they're doing—then they aren't giving the team their very best work," said Natasha, "and both Thor and Loki are an asset."

"They don't seem to have intentions of staying after Amora's been detained," said Steve. "Aren't they both supposed to be running kingdoms?"

"Loki isn't the heir to Jötunheimr, and Thor's dad is still running it hot," Tony supplied.

Steve crumpled. "I really think this is kind of invasive—"

Tony interrupted. "Then don't be involved. I think Nat agrees with me! Maybe."

"I _think,_ " Natasha cut in, "that we should speak to them." She looked pointedly at Tony, before she walked over to the counter and picked up a box of knocked over nutrition bars. "Not whatever stupid scheme you're coming up with."

"Oh come on—"

"Go invent something if you're that bored."

* * *

 

"Spider," said Loki fondly, and Natasha was vaguely started.

"You knew I was here?" said Natasha, emerging from behind a bookshelf in one of the rec rooms.

"I've done a fair bit of sneaking too," said Loki, choosing not to go into much detail about the theft and the lying. It all felt very long ago.

Natasha pressed her lips together. "Do you think I could talk to you and Thor?"

"About what?" Loki said, his tone getting lower. He visibly stiffened and squared his shoulders as Natasha came to stand before him.

"What's going on between you two."

"I really don't think it's any of your business," Loki said, and rose. He was a lot taller than Natasha, but he was not being threatening. At this moment, only warning.

"I don't want your value to be compromised," said Natasha, "and I want this fixed before Fury or someone higher up catches wind of it. That means something stupid would happen. I think we're both against stupid things."

Loki flattened his expression, and put a heavy hand on Nataha's shoulder. She lifted her eyebrow, but continued to stare up at him. "Find Thor and convince him too," Loki said, effectively closing the conversation, and going back to notes about Asgardian magic.

Thor was easier. He was, like Natasha expected at this hour, in the gym. Thor had picked up relatively quickly to all of the gym equipment, and while weight's posed no struggle for him and he was a bit to heavy footed for the treadmill, Thor liked the elliptical. He was on it, at the highest level of resistance but plowing through anyways when Natasha came into the gym only a few minutes after her talk with Loki. A faint sheen of sweat dripped down his forehead onto his nose.

"Lady Natasha," said Thor, a bit tired, "have you come to train with me?"

"No," said Natasha, "another time. I was wondering if you'd come upstairs and talk to Loki with me."

"About what?" said Thor, pausing the machine and getting off in a delicate manner that seemed, in a way, comical.

"About your abilities to work on the team," said Natasha, "in spite of your emotions."

"Loki and I work together fine," said Thor. There was a steely edge of defensiveness in his tone, but the God of Thunder quickly looked away and wiped at his forehead with a towel. Natasha didn't say anything, and after a few beats of silence, Thor said, "Allow me to change and shower and I will accompany you upstairs to him."

Thor was quick, and Natasha waited patiently. Clint walked in a moment after Thor had disappeared to shower. "What are you doing?" he inquired.

"Business," Natasha said passively.

The archer shrugged and plugged in a pair of earbuds, hopping on the treadmill and tuning Natasha out on his own.

Thor came out just a few minutes later, still pretty damp. The two exited the gym quietly, taking care not to interrupt Clint, even though Clint's eyes followed them all the way out as he cranked up the elevation on his treadmill.

Thor is exceptionally morose on the way back upstairs, but Natasha doesn't dwell on it. Thor is smart, and if Thor is feeling introspective, so be it, everyone has a right to be at times.

"This has more depth to it than you realize," said Thor quickly as they scale the flight of stairs, his voice somewhat lost in the clatter of their shoes. They fall back into the steady silence.

Finally, Thor pushed open the door to the rec room, and Natasha followed. Loki is still there, and at the sound of the door opening he ruffles his notes and places them in a binder. "I may have to take one of these hole punches and some of these binders home with me," he said idly. "I find them useful."

"Alright," Natasha chirped. "Sit next to each other. Lets talk." She pasted on her friendly face, determined to keep it on all the way through this. Besides, whatever she gathers is valuable intel. She just needs to listen for it.

"Why, exactly, do you want to pry into our personal business?" Loki asked again.

"I don't," Natasha said. "But, I know you two cooperation, in the end, helps me. So lets start from the beginning—how do you feel to be married to each other?"

Thor and Loki fall quiet for a moment, and they both look at each other. Thor's face is full of emotion, Loki's is clean as a slate.

Thor speaks first. "Scared," he said. "I am too young yet to be married."

Natasha doesn't speak, but she is rewarded a moment later. "I as well," Loki coincided. "My eldest brother was hardly of age to be married when he was. This is too young for me."

Are they just too immature to be married? Natasha thought. There is too much happening here, there has to be more.

Thor goes again. "I do not want to be married. Much less to a jötunn." His voice is prim and reserved, but somehow still diplomatic, but Loki explodes from his seat on the couch and his binder falls to the floor.

"Why do you insist upon this?" he yelled at Natasha. "Why do you want to open these wounds? We salted them shut ourselves."

"Do you want to be married to an Asgardian, Loki?" Natasha said.

"That is none of your concern!"

"Do you?"

"I am lucky to be married at all. To anyone. I will remove myself."

"Loki," said Natasha, knowing she was inching into dangerous territory. Thor looked pained, and Loki looked agitated.

"Fine," said Loki. "Do you want to hear my struggle?"

"Yes." Not really.

"I have never had anything to offer my family! I am a burden, and a spoiled one upon that! I manipulate my brother's to do to my liking, and I manipulate my dam and my sire so I see little consequence of my action! I am worthless to my people, and the only use I've ever had is to marry myself off to that, who looks upon me with disgust whenever I shed this stifling skin!" Loki shouted. His breath was heavy a moment after his outburst.

Thor reeled. Natasha held her breath a moment, before letting it out slowly. Timed.

Loki inched closer, and picked up his binder from the ground. He hugs it against his chest, as if to retreat to his notes and studies. Cling to them.

"Are you glad you said that?" Natasha said.

Loki breathed out slowly. "Yes."

"Is it all true?"

"Some. Some exaggeration."

"Now you two have something to talk about," said Natasha. "Now talk about it." She got up, and sashayed about the room, questioning if she made the right decision. As soon as the door is closed behind her, she looks at the ceiling. "J.A.R.V.I.S.," she said, "monitor Thor and Loki for me, please."

"Of course, Miss Romanoff."

* * *

 

Thor finds courage again, as Loki cursed under his breath, in words Thor knows but no one else in this realm does. Loki curses himself for saying those things in front of Romanoff.

"Loki," Thor said, "you do not disgust me."

"Romantic."

"I've told you this before, there is room to change. I want us to change."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to admit, I'm not in this fandom much anymore. However, I'm in it for the long haul on this story, whatever it takes, and I hope you guys are too. This story is so close--and I know a lot of people don't really like where it's going anymore, which kind of sucks for me to see. 
> 
> I will finish this story.


	42. Paint Away the Pain

The evening after Thor and Loki's latest terse discussion, Thor showed his face to Loki again. Loki was in the quarters, piles of handwritten notes and printed pages scattered around him. He had textbooks too, and his own notebook. In his mouth he chewed on a pen, and he twirled a pencil in the fingers of his left hand. A quill sat in the inkwell next to him, and presently he was occupied reading a sheet of paper—a random string of numbers that Stark's armor had produced—yet again.

Everyone knew he'd take his notes all over the tower and study wherever he chose, be it odd and innocuous nooks and crannies, actually suitable spots, or just in-conducive places to work, like the kitchen in the morning situated right next to the coffee grinder. Not even Bruce and Tony, who had provided him the printed sheets and the textbooks (Physics and Chemistry) were exactly sure what he was studying anymore, or if it was even anything at all.

"Ah hah!" Loki suddenly said, turning around to stare straight at Thor. "I've got it!" he said.

"Got what?" Thor said, surprised and nervous, not having thought that Loki had detected his presence.

"The answer," said Loki, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. He pointed to a string of numbers on his sheet that had been highlighted three different times in three different colors with penciled in arrows connecting it to other unrelated strings.

"This," Loki said, in a strange tone, "is the form of magic Amora's using to teleport. Now that I have it, I can write a spell that will force her to drag me with her at her heels."

"Are you sure you want to do that?" Thor trailed off, suddenly self conscious about his worrying. "What kind of magic is it?" he settled on asking.

Loki tilted his head and furrowed his nose a bit. "It's ice magic," he said, "she took the basic principles of ice magic, which come subconsciously to the Jotnar, and applied them to her skill set. That's why it exhausts her, she's taking power from her surroundings and thinking too much about it."

"Thus it should be easy enough for you to devise a countermeasure?" Thor guessed.

"Not exactly," Loki said ruefully. "You often ruin what comes naturally by putting thought to it," he continued. "Think about breathing," he said, and Thor immediately began to think about the rise and fall of his breath... "and you find yourself out of breath," Loki finished.

"So you've run into trouble," Thor said.

"No," Loki replied in light, lilting sarcasm.

"I apologize," Thor said.

"I'm frustrated and taking it out on you," Loki said in a tone of unnatural self awareness, his words stilted. "It's hard to develop a spell for a form of magic I can't explain—" he interrupted himself, snapping his fingers—"It just is. That is why it took me so long to recognize what Amora was even doing."

"Do not strain yourself," Thor said carefully, trying to put Loki at ease. "Hush your mind."

"I can't, people are dying," Loki said.

"More will die if you are sloppy, and Amora learns what you have learned and stops you."

Loki sighed deeply. He put his pencil down, the slightly dented chewed pen aside it. He tangled his hand in the jet black Aesir hair, cracking it out of it's slick, oily uniformity, coming to rest as a crown of soft waves.

Thor finally sat himself aside him, and as he relaxed into the cushion he gingerly wrapped an arm around Loki's bony shoulders. After a moment, Loki deemed the touch appropriate and relaxed into it, just a bit, and thus Thor thought, "this could be a start".

* * *

Everyone saw less of Loki over the next week. He was nearly in hiding. Thor would go to the quarters and find Loki, rereading notes for the umpteenth time, or meditating, or arm's deep in a bucket of ice.

Often enough Thor carried Loki to the bed after he fell asleep meditating.

One day while Loki worked in his ice bucket, Thor noisily opened the suite door. Startled, Loki turned around and set an an icicle flying towards Thor.

"Aah!" he yelled, just barely dodging. "You almost stabbed me!"

"I apologize," Loki said, "You startled me." He waved his hand, and the icicle melted into a wet puddle on the floor. Thor sighed and moved into the kitchenette, where he picked up a rag to wipe up the mess.

As he knelt down and started to scrub, Thor said, "Why are you on edge, anyways?"

"It's always good to be aware," Loki lilted, pulling his hands out of his ice bucket. They came out blue, but slowly took their Aesir color again. Thor shot Loki a patronizing look, and Loki's shoulders fell. He said, "Amora's planning something. I can feel it."

"Are you getting closer?" Thor asked wearily, as he tossed the rag into a basket. Loki looked thoughtful for a moment. Thor picked up the bucket and dumped it into the sink for him.

"I think," he said. It'd be easier if I had someone to practice with."

Thor quieted, unsure how to respond to those words. "Do you miss your brothers still?" he finally said.

"I do," Loki said, "but maybe it's good that I don't have everything in the world that I want."

* * *

 

Peace, and stillness. Let all of your sorrows wash away. In, out.

Thor's hand encircled Loki's wrist and pulled him to his feet as his eyes blinked open. "What?" Loki said, coming to awareness.

"Amora," said Thor, "above the tower."

"Above the tower?" Loki echoed in horror.

"Put this on," Thor said, shoving an earpiece into Loki's other hand that Loki clicked into place, waving a hand and letter his clothes switch fluidly into battle regalia.

"Thor, is Loki on yet?" somebody's tinny voice resounded in his ear.

Loki clicked the device. "Present. Going upstairs."

"Okay,"

"Thor, let go of me!" Loki said, wrenching his wrist from Thor's hand. Loki immediately began sprinting up the hallway to the elevator.

Instead of pressing the button, Loki did a somersault and disappeared in a flash.

“Loki!” Thor pressed his intercom as hard as he could without breaking it. “Where are you?”

Loki's line crackled to life in time for him to say, “gone,” before there was a loud crack and his line disappeared.

“What just happened?” Thor said into the com in general.

“Get outside, Thor,” Natasha said. “Amora hasn't left much except for some scorch marks behind.”

“Loki appeared out of thin air and grabbed Natasha, and then they were both gone,” said Steve.

At the same time as Steve was speaking, “I'm pretty sure those scorches were Loki.”

“Then where is Loki?” said Thor, pressing the elevator button to get up to the roof.

“We don't know,” said Clint.

* * *

 

Loki blinked his eyes open, surveying around himself. He lay on his chest, his knees folded under him in a dark, unfamiliar space. His legs ached, but thought revealed to him it was the pain of blossoming bruises, and nothing more serious.

Somebody beside him coughed, and as Loki became more aware, he realized that there was a bit of a faint light in the place, although it did not seem to have any definite source—it seemed to radiate from the air around them, everywhere but nowhere all at once. Amora's figure came all the more into focus for him, she lay on her side, coughing up some sort of sticky splatter.

As his eyes focused more, he realized that this location was some sort of living space. There was a scent of rot that seemed to permeate all about him, and the floor was slightly damp and dark with stains—Loki wasn't sure what he wanted to think they were of. Testing himself, he through himself forward and grabbed his arms around Amora, shocking her out of her stupor.

In hindsight, it probably wasn't the wisest of moves the Loki could have made at that moment, but both he and Amora were groggy and weary from the teleportation. Amora tried to push Loki off of her, and with his fingers on her skin he could feel her heartbeat, thundering through her body and making itself known from every spot of her skin, it was beating in wild, erratic palpitations, and Loki felt very surprised when he felt a knife slide into the tender flesh of his thigh.

He recoiled from his hold on her with a scream, as Amora had effectively wedged a blade in the chink of his armor on his thigh, which hurt in wild pulses of sharp pain and would surely bleed profusely once the blade was removed.

Feeling like he was about to throw up from the pain, Loki shot a blast of his ice at her, freezing the fingers of her right hand together in bitter, bitter cold. Amora shrieked in turn, but they were both so exhausted and tired that neither retaliated further, only panting in the dark and listening to the haggard sounds of the others breathing.

Loki did not dare move his leg, for fear of doing further damage.

It continued like this for several hours, becoming perhaps one of the most pathetic fights that Loki had ever fault. One would sum up the strength to strike the other through some purchase, and the other would retaliate in turn, and after that they would both be so exhausted from the strenuous effort and the new injuries that it took time to strike again.

Loki steadily froze further and further up Amora's body, encasing her in ice. The ice was creeping up her neck when he finally struggled out, "take us home, or I'll kill you, I swear... Take us home and I'll get them to spare your pathetic life."

"Don't wanna be spared," Amora struggled out, her voice just as weak as his was.

"Then what do you want?"

"Not sure anymore," she huffed out, and neither found room to speak for a few moments. Finally, Amora said, "he doesn't love me," she continued, "but he'll never love you either."

Silence.

Loki wasn't sure when her free leg curled around one of his exactly, or how much time had passed as the sickening experience repeated itself—and the mad woman turned herself in. Feeling the presence of the tower, Loki melted the ice, and Amora let out a sigh seconds before the Avengers pounced to detain her.

Loki remembered no further, suddenly finding it imperative to fall asleep.

* * *

 

Loki woke up on one of Stark's medical beds, hooked up to some machines that he figured suited more of a purpose for studying him than they did for treating him. His leg hurt, and it felt like there was a dull ache ringing everywhere in his body, and it took him a few minutes to realize that Thor had sat himself very closely to Loki.

"What do you want?" Loki said in an exasperated sigh, lacking it's usual bitterness or usual lilt, he just seemed very tired.

"Amora has been sent to the custody of Asgard," Thor said, "and she awaits trial. She will likely be put to death."

"She... she said..." Loki strained a moment to remember it. "She said she didn't want to be spared."

"Whatever retribution Asgard gives her," Thor said seriously, "it will be quicker and more efficient than a death by your ice or at the hands of the Chi'tauri."

"Indeed," Loki murmured.

"They think that she put some spell upon you," Thor said, "and that it compromises your nerves, your senses, so what you think is happening may not truly be."

"Thor," Loki said, steamrolling over the unpleasant topic, "how long were Amora and I gone?"

"Ten minutes, at most, she pulled you away to her space," Thor said, shifting awkwardly and looking upon Loki with steady eyes.

"Oh," Loki said. "It felt like hours..." Silence fell, an uncomfortable rhythm hanging in the background creating by soft hums and whirs of the machines Stark had going. After a moment, Thor pulled the cord from its socket, and the room fell deathly silent all except for the steady hum of the incandescent light. "Thor," Loki ventured, "What happens now?"

"I... I do not know," Thor replied. "Perhaps we try to pave peace for our people?"

"When you put it that way," Loki whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YYYYYYOOOO. 
> 
> A month and fifty thousand words of belligerent one sided sexual tension (and pirates) later, I'm back. Hopefully updates are going to pick up now, because we're about to hit a slightly more interesting patch of story than Amora, and then kinda wrap things up. 
> 
> As always, I apologize for lateness, blahblahblah. This chapter would've been longer, but I've decided to cut off the last 500/750 words (that would make the chapter a bit longer than usual) and attach them to next chapter (which will also be a bit longer than usual) to get this out quicker.
> 
> And, of course, thank you all for your patience and support. I wouldn't be 60k+ in this mess without you guys.
> 
> EDIT: Forgot to mention before--500 kudos! 100+ bookmarks (closer to 130 including private bookmarks...) THANK YOU SO MUCH


	43. The History Haunts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was this a long wait or a short wait for us now? Ugh!

The next morning, Thor decided (Bruce disagreed) that Loki was well enough to withstand travel by Bifröst. “Um, you can’t really take that, it’s ours;” Stark had protested as Thor took Amora from his custody.

However, the normally cuddly and carefree Thor could absolutely terrify mortals with one serious look, the Avengers would learn, and the will of the god was enough to scare of even Stark. If Thor decided to drag off his spouse--and some who was technically the prisoner of said spouse, on Midgard, in the end, there was not much power to stop him. 

Arriving in Asgard, Loki immediately leaned over and threw up on Amora's feet. The prisoner just stared at the mess until a pair of guards began to drag her away.

* * *

Loki lay on the bed he shared with Thor, and stared at the ceiling. It felt like it had been a very long time since he lay here in this very spot, and so much had happened since that last time laying here. Thor had left Loki alone for the time being, giving Loki the solitude he'd been wanting for a while. Where he went, Loki wasn't sure.

Loki took a nap, and woke up a short time later, jerking from sleep as another weight was added to the bed, causing the mattress to dip. He opened his eyes and looked up at the other body that settled beside him. "Thor," he greeted softly.

"Loki," said Thor, "we should speak." 

“Mmm,” Loki said, stretching out on the bed like a cat, before curling back up in the fetal position he'd been in before, staring at Thor. “What do you want to speak of?” he asked.

“Us,” he said simply, his hand moving to point between the two of them as Loki yawned again heavily. “I want... I'm not sure the difference between what I want and what I hope for.”

“It's no good to quarrel anymore,” Loki said calmly, moving his feet to kick at Thor's playfully, “and there is significantly less to distress and distract us now... so I think,” he finished.

“Agreed,” Thor said, relenting to the game of footsie Loki seemed to be trying to initiate. Loki pulled his feet away from Thor's after a moment, and his appearance changed from the mock Aesir to his own jötunn self. Thor took a sharp breath of intake, realizing that he had stopped associating the two appearances as two different people.

It seemed that was a step.

* * *

 

Loki and Thor appeared together at events like they were supposed to. They were present for Amora's execution, but the event made no real impact on either of them. Amora no longer registered as a person, in Loki's eyes, she was a husk, a shriveled remain of what was once a great sorceress, and perhaps, Loki had thought, it was for the best for her.

They started coming in for feasts and sitting next to each other, and Loki stomached Aesir food better now, and was found to match Thor in drinking competitions when both got in the mood, and what happened after they both wandered off compromised was not spoken of, and often enough, not recollected.

However, not all time was wasted. Thor trained, Loki practiced, and they took most of their meals together and slept in the same bed. Loki dressed in Thor's colors on occasion, and sometimes Thor took Loki's. Summer turned to fall turned to winter, and the couple continued as was.

Loki's family had begun to write him again several months ago, for which he was pleased. Loki had answered back with vigor, and he hoped that he would be on good enough terms with all of his family by summer so he could spend the season with them as he was allowanced.

Loki sat at his desk with the bundle of mail he'd been delivered, and noticed it was thinner than usual. He untied the string and unfolded the cloth surrounding the package, and discovered that it only contained one letter, which was rather thick with his name scribbled hastily on the outside of the envelope, in his dam's handwriting, thick and harsh.

He grabbed the letter opener and neatly slit the envelope. Several papers fluttered out, folded tightly. One bore the words, 'read first'.

Loki bit his lip and unfolded the letter, scanning the contents hastily, reading it through once before realizing that not a single thing written in the letter had registered in his brain at all. He blinked heavily, and went back to the beginning of the note. His dam's hand writing was larger than usual, as if he had been compromised by emotion while he wrote it, making the sparse note seem longer than it was.

_Loki ---_

_Geirni, the peasant, and his brother, have confirmed the existence of a pregnancy of his. Their village healer has confirmed that the child of presence is a son of yours. You must return to Jotunheimr immediately Loki, so we may deal with the problem swiftly and take responsibility for your actions. I am not through with you, brat!_

_Laufey-king_

Loki let out a groan as the letterings finally made sense and connected inside of his head. “Loki?” Thor said from the other side of the room. Loki looked up, and saw Thor standing outside the door to the bathroom. “What is wrong?” Thor asked.

“Oh, just divorce me already,” Loki said melodramatically, thrusting the letter towards Thor and rubbing at his brow with his thumb and forefinger, as he scanned the other papers that had come with the note. One seemed to be a healer's notice, and another was a letter that looked very strongly worded that seemed to have appeared from Sæhildr, which Loki spared himself the upset of reading.

Thor read the letter carefully, lines appearing on his forehead as he became more and more worried, and Loki watched him. “I guess we're telling my father that we're taking a trip to Jötunheimr,” Thor said.

* * *

 

“Laufey king,” and attendant called, rushing through the halls into the small parlor room where Laufey occasionally did his paperwork.

The king looked up mildly, not absorbed in any particular task at the moment, and he nodded amiably at the attendant, and said, “well, go on with what you have to say then.”

“Prince Thor and Loki prince have arrived in the outlying city by Bifröst!” the attendant relayed, “they're making their way towards the palace, Laufey king.”

“Thank you,” Laufey said, dismissing the attendant with a nod, standing up and fixing his clothes a bit, singleminded in the task. It seemed that Loki had finally learned punctuality at least, but there was plenty else for Loki to learn now, which he had made clear himself.

Laufey had Fárbauti and Helblindi called down to meet Thor and Loki with him in the entrance hall, and the three stood in agitated silence as the waited for the pair to enter. Helblindi looked most unsettled of them all, fidgeting on his feet and looking about the room nervously, as if he was checking for something, but Helblindi was the one hurt most of all amongst the three of them by Loki's past actions, so Laufey supposed he was justified in his weariness. Helblindi looked very heavily pregnant these days, fragile, almost.

The couple entered the entrance hall, in a manner that did not live up to the agitated expectations of minutes before, and they quickly fell into awkward bows, and as they got up Thor looked at the air while Loki made awkward eye contact with the members of his scorned family.

Laufey tried to sum it up inside himself to say something tender to his son, but found that he lacked the words to do so. “Go up to your usual quarters,” he finally said, “we're leaving for Geirni's village in the morning.”

* * *

 

Against what may have been his better judgement, Loki decided that he should visit his elder brother before they departed in the morning together. He left Thor in his chambers, and found Helblindi in his. Helblindi had been visibly exhausted when he'd seen him, and Loki was not surprised to see his brother laying in his bed when he quietly entered the room, his stomach rounded out and firm as Helblindi seemed to stare off into nothing.

“Brother?” Loki said hesitantly, as he stepped into the room and found himself picking at his clothes as he did so.

Helblindi made a sharp movement as he jerked his head to look at Loki, and Loki found no underlying hostilities, but a lot of worry in his gaze. “Brother,” Helblindi greeted, and said, “sit on the bed next to me.”

Loki made the jump to clamor onto his brother's bed, and found himself feeling remarkably childlike in the simple action. In the months on Midgard (where he'd even been considered rather large) and on Asgard, he had gotten used to being at a functional size, and now, back to his true nature, he found it rather disgruntling. 

However, it was the closest he'd been to a member of his family in that time, and he found that he had missed it, even though Helblindi was acting so strange and weary about him, although Loki knew there was a reason Helblindi acted as so. It was not like it could just be forgotten that Loki had paralyzed him and left him in a secret passage months ago... Looking back, Loki knew it could have jeopardized the baby, and Loki felt very guilty.

“Loki...” Helblindi said plainly. “Loki, why do you hurt me?”


	44. Defined By His Mistakes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Five days. Not a bad wait, per se...

“W-What?” asked Loki, stunned by Helblindi's questioning. It didn't make sense, and it just seemed so irregular of a thing for Helblindi to say—but then again, all of Helblindi's behavior in the past few hours had seemed very strange and out of character for him.

“Sorry, that was a stupid question,” Helblindi said, turning away from his brother and staring blankly at the wall. His hand drifted over his pregnant belly, and Loki narrowed his eyes.

“If you say something, you mean something by it. Please tell me what you are thinking,” Loki said smoothly, and Helblindi seemed to fidget for a long moment. 

“A lot of things gone wrong could be blamed on you, Loki,” Helblindi finally said, “a lot of things gone wrong in my life.”

Loki reeled for a moment, quickly snapping the first thought that came to his mind, “you can blame our dam and sire too, then, since those two idiots birthed me.” As soon as Loki snapped those two words, he regretted them, and the look on Helblindi's face revealed nothing of his feelings. “I am sorry,” Loki said, “that was the wrong thing to say. Please explain yourself,” he said awkwardly, cursing in his thoughts and digging little half moons into the skin on the palm of his hands with his fingernails.

“I.. I have lost so very much,” Helblindi said. “I do not often voice it, but I have lost the glorious realm I was born to, I have lost all the things I used to love to do, and the books I loved to read, I have lost my mate, I haven't seen Býleistr in months and will only see him when we go to see Geirni's village, and I have nearly lost my life,” he said, “and it was all for you,” he finished. “You don't do much to repay me, Loki.”

Loki flushed. “I did not lose the realm, the Ice City, or the library,” he said. “Those were the consequences of our parents actions, not mine, and I didn't even want them to go to war, I never even wanted to have Midgard! And having seen Midgard now, I still don't want it!” He said angrily, getting up and pacing about the room in spite. “If you do not remember, you were the one who dragged Fálki to the vault, even though I said not too! And our estrangement from Býleistr is not the consequence of my actions, it is the consequence of his, for supporting mine! Býleistr is grown, and he makes his own choices just as you and I!”

Loki breathed heavily for a moment, before digging in his heels and saying, “But it does not matter who's actions these are the consequence of! What matters is that we move on from these consequences and put our lives back together, and I can't say you're doing a great job of it if you have to blame me for your problems to get by, brother,” he finally spat, and walked out of the room.

As he traveled the corridors back to his own quarters, Loki found himself starting to cry, tears pricking at his eyes. Where had the days gone when all he vied for was Helblindi's approval?

* * *

 

In the morning they left, Thor and Loki walking some meters behind all the others as they did, because Laufey and Fárbauti were still foreboding and wordless for them, and Helblindi had stared at Loki with empty eyes in the morning that rather frightened him.

The walk was long and brutal, as it had been before, but the half finished road did improve parts of it, and Laufey and Fárbauti comforted their people when they came upon parts of the road being worked on, and they were granted with more food for the journey in return. The workers stared at Thor and Loki with inquiring eyes, so curious of the Aesir wrapped up tight in fur.

But Loki couldn't care. What he worried for was the reunion with Geirni, most of all.

* * *

 

When they arrived, they were sheltered together in the town hall. Thor still shivered, and some people offered up more fur's and blankets from their homes for him, and curled up in them, Thor slept. Loki watched him, at first, his fingers flicking ice stuck to his nose and snowflakes in his eyelashes off, watching Thor carefully as if he might disappear if he took his eyes off of him.

Finally, though, Loki had to pull himself away. He had unfinished business here, and it was time to start cleaning up his own messes.

He walked to Geirni's cottage, and stood in front of the door for a long moment, gathering up the courage to knock. Finally, he lifted his hand and did so, taking one last shallow breath as the door swung open.

There stood Geirni, certainly a sight for sore eyes, and they both stared at one another for a moment, neither willing to make a pass or a comment. Finally, Loki breathed in sharply once more, and said, “may we speak?”

“I guess,” said Geirni, ushering Loki in, and said in a biting tone, “do not make yourself comfortable, though.” Loki did not unstring his cloak, or take a seat on the chair, and Geirni stood too, as they stared at each other for a long moment. “Go on, then,” Geirni said, “say what you have to say.”

Loki thought a moment more, and said, “I came to apologize, truly,” he said, unable to keep his eyes from looking at Geirni's stomach, even though Geirni was not showing. He could see the beginning of one of the lines he'd carved into Geirni's back, and thought of his own, laying beneath the cloak.

“You may eat your words then,” Geirni said, “apology not accepted.”

They stared at each other for moments more, before Loki said, “I know not how I feel about the child. I feel attachment to him, though, somehow, as I look at you.”

` “It matters not,” said Geirni, “I am the bastard's dam, and ultimately hold responsibility. Whether you want the child or not is a decision that you have no right to make,” he said, “because the child is tied to my body, not yours. Have your own brat, you've got the most virile of the Æsir.”

* * *

 

The first and foremost of the problems, though, was Pállson. Geirni and Sæhildr had made a point of not speaking with him at all, but Pállson was bitter and angry, and seemed so very charismatic.

Although the royals knew not of it, Geirni had noticed how more and more of the villagers were treating the royal family bitterly. Particularly Helblindi, he noticed, was spoken of with scorn when the villagers thought they were surrounded by only troubled ears, and this worried him. Helblindi was weak, and heavily pregnant, and even Geirni, troubled by his own thoughts, could tell that there was something seriously wrong with Helblindi at the moment.

However, he had not expected all of this to come to a head as it did. Helblindi had ventured into the village, hoping to buy some fish, expecting the villagers to be reverent and glad to see him as all the other Jötnar he had met on his journey were. He was happy, and reunited with his brother Býleistr, who was quiet and spoke nothing as Helblindi conversed with the fish man. 

Geirni was in the square at the time, looking over a merchants display of knives when the screaming had begun.

Pállson was the loudest, shouting words of treason for all the villagers to hear, and his staunchest supporters were around him, along with the heaviest of them. The youngest prince had been pinned against a building, and the crown prince was pinned to the ground as more and more people started screaming. Býleistr had finally made a sound, letting out a guttural howl as he tried to fight away, back to his brother, who did not have the strength to fight back much himself, for fear of the baby.

Geirni ran from the stand, which the merchant himself had left, using his size to wiggle through the growing crowd of onlookers. The rest of the royal family had burst out of the town hall, hearing the commotion. Some men had pinned down Helblindi's legs, and Pállson's brother stood with his feet on either side of Helblindi's neck, ice crystals blossoming from his fingers as he stood over his prince.

Geirni's head flipped to the sound as somebody roared “ _Get away!_ ” a flash of red and pale, pale skin crashing into Pállson's brother. The jötunn screeched on impact and was thrown to the ground, frost bite blooming all over the Æsir prince's skin as he touched him. But the Æsir's screams were drowned out by one other.

The crown prince, with ice crystals buried in his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, shit, I just can't get enough of fucking Helblindi up, can't I?


	45. Meeting the Other

“ _Get out! Out!_ ” Laufey roared, and the crowd moved away in terror, as their kings, and the middle prince rush to Helblindi. Those holding Býleistr dropped him in fright. Pállson was nowhere at all to be found in all the commotion. “Helblindi,” Laufey said softly, draping himself over his eldest son. “Loki, Loki help me,” he finally pleaded.

The runtling prince was already at his brother's side, fingers tentatively touching the skin on his face. Helblindi was going into shock, he could tell. Loki took a deep breath, and said, “My sire, please hold his head down.”

“What are you doing?” Laufey inquired as Fárbauti kneeled in front of his son, and pressed a palm to his forehead to keep it down.

“Preventing further damage,” Loki breathed, flicking his hand up quickly, and he watched as the ice flew from his brother's eyes. Helblindi screamed, and he began to bleed profusely, fighting his parents hands holding him down, snapping him out of shock. “Get bandages!” Loki screamed, before turning to Fárbauti and yelling, “Sire, knock him out!”

Fárbauti looked terribly conflicted for a moment, but finally he collided his fist with his child's head, and Helblindi stopped his screaming and only twitched. Býleistr shoved a roll of gauze into Loki's hands, and Loki tied it carefully about his brother's eyes, the white gauze quickly tainting red with blood. “Take him in,” Loki said, “I must help my husband.”

Something inside Loki was screaming, but he methodically ignored it as he kneeled in front of Thor, keeping an eye on the healer that was dragging Helblindi away. Thor was screaming, but it was turning hoarse and growing weaker. Loki analyzed the damage with a careful eye—most of Thor's armor had frozen and shattered, not meant for that sort of temperature, and the soft skin underneath was white, but in some areas, blackening. “Shh,” Loki whispered softly, “I'll take care of this. I'll make it better, I swear to you...” He knelt next to Thor, and had suddenly decided that he doesn't care who is watching him at this moment. His stomach lurched as he ran his fingers over the damaged skin—he was never talented with this—and tries to soothe the pain first. Thor groaned, and looked as if he was trying to say something, but in the end the god falls quiet. He stared at Loki with heavy lidded eyes, watching Loki as he clenches and unclenches his hands, finally placing the best of his healing magic on the frost bite, and even though Loki tried to numb it all, Thor howled in pain, but then he quiets.

Loki looked over his work. The blackened and dead skin had disappeared, and had been replaced by new, pink skin. He could feel the heat radiating off of the skin without even setting his hand on it—but it is alive, and Thor had quieted. Loki grunted, but he found the strength and lifted his husband up in his arms, and carried him away.

* * *

 

It was a hard day, and like those days past, Loki somehow found himself sitting inside Geirni's kitchen. He needed away—he needed away from Býleistr's and his parents crying—and most of all he needed to be away from Helblindi and Thor's silence. If he hadn't been so _stupid_ none of this would be happening—he'd be in Asgard with a loving relationship with Thor and maybe he'd be pregnant... and he probably would not have hurt nearly as many people.

Geirni was fussing around and he was trying his hardest not to look at Loki, but Loki hadn't really cared, staring off into the distance. “Your parents are giving me the money to pay for the abortion, you know,” Geirni finally said mildly.

“I really don't want you too,” Loki said in a soft voice, clenching his hands into little fists, the wrinkles at his knuckles turning white.

“What are you going to do about it?” Geirni said, looking at Loki. “In the first place, I'm not fit to carry a child. I'm not a runt like you, I'm just stunted. It's not healthy for me, and that is already showing, the healer was saying so.”

“I know!” Loki said, suddenly feeling frustrated. “It just... it makes me upset. I'm so conflicted. I don't want the child... but it's still mine.”

“No,” said Geirni, “it's not. It's mine. We are not, and were never together... and you cannot care for this child, even if you wanted to. Which I doubt. What would the Æsir say if you brought home a Jötnar baby?”

Loki's expression softened, but his fingers were still curled. He looked like he would like to cry. He wasn't sure why this mattered so much to him, and he was honestly a bit afraid to tell anyone else about this feeling. 

“Loki,” Geirni said quietly, with much more kindness than Loki deserved, “you know you don't love this baby. You just love the idea of one. Now would you please leave? I'm expecting my brother.”

* * *

 

Thor's wounds were painful, but Loki healed them quickly, really, and within a few hours he was back on his feet. Laufey and Fárbauti were frantically sending messages, as they tried to figure out if Helblindi was safe to travel. Safe to get back to his own healers in the palace.

Loki had gone back to sit with his brother, who still wasn't conscious. The whole family was in there, but Thor just wasn't comfortable with the scene, and he was realizing there was something he really, really needed to do,

By Loki's instruction, he walked down the narrow and unplanned streets until he arrived at a little cottage, and knocked on the door.

Commotion and voices were heard inside, but Thor stood in patient wait until the door creaked open. A voice said, “Loki, I told you to wait—” but stopped, upon realizing it was somebody else entirely. A shorter jötunn emerged from the door, and he and Thor locked eyes for a long, uncertain moment, until the jötunn bowed his head and waved Thor inside the cottage.

“You are Geirni, yes?” said Thor upon entering the modest space. He looked about for a long moment, at the pots and pans hanging on the walls, the furs strewn about, and the larger, angrier jötunn sitting at the table. “And you are Sæ,” Thor said to the other one.

“I am Geirni,” the first jötunn said, “and he prefers Sæhildr.” he shut the door behind Thor, watching the Æsir as he looked about for a moment, before finally choosing to stand near the table. “Sit,” Geirni said.

“No, I do not mean to impose,” Thor said, before belatedly adding, “I am Thor Odinson.”

“We know your name,” Sæhildr said, “now what more need do you and your kind have to mess about in my family's affairs?”

“No messing,” Thor said, as Geirni sat back down in his chair, “I only wish to speak with you, about my spouse's situation here... I would like to hear it from your mouth, if you do not mind.”

“He does mind,” Sæhildr bit out.

“No, brother, I do not,” said Geirni softly, “brother, why don't you step out into the town and buy us some fish for dinner?” Sæhildr seethed, but he got out of his chair and walked out the door without as much as a goodbye in his spite. “Sit down,” Geirni sighed.

Thor sat gingerly in the chair Sæhildr had sat in before, and said, “please, just tell me the story, and your thoughts,” he said.

Geirni took a deep breath, and said, “Loki has given me a child I do not want,” he said in a long voice, looking at his fingers. “And he fights me on getting rid of it.”

“I thought so,” Thor said, before looking at Geirni and saying, “do you hate me?”

“No,” Geirni said. “No, of course not. You were just as spited by this... situation as I have been. I do not see you at fault, not at all.”

“Oh...” Thor said. “I suppose. When I heard of what had happened, I was so angry. But not at you, at Loki, but I couldn't really show it, because I needed Loki's help.”

“I was angry too, when I had realized what had happened to me,” Geirni said, “but my feelings are still in a mess.”

“Um,” Thor said, his voice hesitating and catching in a way it normally never did. “Did you ever have feelings for Loki?”

“Maybe in another life, in another time,” Geirni said, “but someone like me cannot feel that way for Loki. It is not right.”

When Geirni wasn't looking, Thor left money on his counter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Holidays. Three chapters to go.


	46. And Move

As soon as they could, the royals left. The left enough of a mess behind, they figured. Helblindi was the hardest to move. He would not be regaining his sight, ever, they said.

The journey home was punishing, and the weather raged and howled just for them as they made the reluctant trek towards Utgard. At the back of Loki's mind, it ate at him that his child was going to die soon. Would every child he ever fathered or mothered be forced to die by his own mistakes? This was the second one now.

He understood why the child had to go, of course. It could potentially destroy the uneasy peace between Asgard and Jötunheimr, it strained his marriage, and if he left it to Geirni to raise in his little village Geirni would have yet more trouble mating and would have another hungry mouth to feed. And the child would know his father was a prince, a prince who did not want him.

It was all such a mess, really.

They arrived home, eventually. Loki was not sure how long the journey was, it could have been hours or years, it all felt the same these days.

Thor was quiet, and didn't speak except when required. He seemed deep in his own thoughts, probably struggling with his own perception of the mess. Wondering if he could ever get close to his husband again, or if he ever was at all. It was a marriage of convenience, after all.

On the second night after the arrived at the palace at Utgard, a messenger showed up at Loki's quarters. He was escorted in, and the lean traveler gave a deep bow, his long, curved horns nearly scraping the floor, it seemed. “Good day,” the messenger greeted, “I am here to relay that Geirni has gone through with his abortion. The babe is dead.”

“Dismissed,” Loki said quietly, feeling his stomach plummet through the floor to somewhere down beneath. Thor inched closer to his husband after the messenger left and had shut the door in a quick decisive movement.

Thor knew the look of despair that crossed Loki's face, he'd seen it before, he'd seen it when Loki had first miscarried all those months ago. Thor finally moved close enough, and wrapped his arms around his Loki.

Loki crumpled in those strong arms and gave in, finally starting to cry. They were not heavy, body wracking sobs, but a steady stream of tears that caused him to hiccup a little in Thor's arms. It was the weakest Thor had ever seen him.

“I'm sorry,” Loki said, wiping at his face with the back of his hand, his blue jötunn skin slowly feeling warmer and warmer to Thor's touch. “I shouldn't be crying. What has happened is right.”

“The babe is still yours,” Thor comforted, “and you knew it was there. Your grief is not unjustified,” he said sweetly, running his fingers through Loki's hair. To an outsider, they must have been quite the sight, pressed together, Loki crying into the thick furs Thor wore.

“The child should never have been,” said Loki grievously, heavy grief intertwining with his voice. “Really, perhaps I never should have been,” he finally said.

“Do not say that,” Thor said, “with you, our realms have found peace. With you, I have found peace,” he said, his voice gaining conviction with each passing word, “with you, Loki,” Thor said, “I have been forced to grow, to be a better man. Things are better with you, Loki.”

“You mean no such things,” Loki denied, “Look what I have wrought on Geirni. He'd be better without me.”

“Geirni would be better without your actions,” Thor said softly, “Do not hate yourself, loathe your actions. Without you, Geirni's life would be worse, he'd live in a realm without the Casket of Ancient Winters, would he not?”

Loki bit his lips, and Thor noticed his crying had slowed. He dabbed at Loki's cheeks with his sleeve, before tugging Loki backwards, so they lay down on the bed instead of sitting at the foot of it. “I do then. I loathe my actions.”

“Then all you can do is give your apologies, which you have, and try to move on,” Thor said. “I know you, Loki,” he went on. “You are smart and kind, and you have done all you can,” he clasped Loki's hands, “and I am proud of you for that.” Quiet. “I love you for that reasons like that, Loki.”

Loki breathed in sharply, and Thor felt himself tense as he awaited a response. He couldn't remember if he'd said this to Loki before. It all blended together sometimes, a whirlwind of existence, periods of his life marked into “Before Loki” and “After Loki”.

“I love you too, Thor,” Loki finally said.

“I think perhaps we should go home, soon,” Thor suggested, searching Loki's face, his fingers tracing the patterns that adorned the bridges of Loki's palms.

Asgard. Home. Yes, Asgard was home, now, maybe, Loki mused. “Yes, we should,” Loki softly agreed, and then conceded to letting Thor hold him, and he tied the two to silence, choosing to say no more words for the time.

* * *

 

They left without bothering with goodbyes. There were letters that could be written at a later date, and for now no goodbyes were supposed to be permanent, and Loki did not quite want to meet his family's eyes. Perhaps he would regret it later, he thought, but he had many regrets, and he did not want them getting lonely.

They left early in the morning, leaving only a note. Not many words were exchanged until they arrived in the palace, when dear sweet Frigga saw the two and immediately ran to hug them, her grip strong and tight. “I have missed you!” she trilled to Loki, kissing his now Æsir colored cheek and smoothing out his collar. “Ah, you are both grown so handsome,” she said sweetly.

Frigga seemed to have a gift of knowing how to act, and the court of Asgard was friendly and somewhat detached as always when they arrived home. There was a feast, and they ate. They began to fall back into routines, Loki studying magic and Thor studying statesmanship. Thor taught Loki better fist fighting, Loki helped Thor with his aim knife throwing.

They were domesticity, in a word.

Meals were ate together, “I love yous” exchanged.

* * *

 

Thor had always been one to be frank, or even brash with his words. He did not hold his tongue, he did not regret what was said, there was no reason to be doing so.

But still, Thor was nervous to broach the topic of trying for another child, and he wanted to, desperately. It was not as if there was pressure this time, instead there was a desire, to be with Loki, to share these experiences, to choose a child. To choose to change his life for good.

Thor had treated Loki with nothing but delicacy and the greatest respect since they'd returned to Asgard from Jötunheimr in these last months. He'd defended Loki from sharp and biting words, and had chosen to spend most of his time with his husband. But still, they had not returned to a truly physical relationship, and Thor was not sure how to. All they ever shared were chaste kisses.

One evening, he and Loki took supper privately in their chambers, with not as much as a manservant with them once they had had the warm food delivered to them. Sometimes it was nice to not have someone trying to please you hand and foot—it was more personal, really.

They spoke of idle court gossip and scandals, of their training and studies. Thor talked about being king, Loki spoke of his research, and the beginnings of a project to write a book on his expertise of magic. “I'm thinking of taking students too,” he said calmly. “Trying to teach new techniques. I think I might be developing a way for Æsir to access the ice magic. It would be an interesting experiment,” he went on, his eyes lighting up.

Thor liked to hear Loki talk of these things.

“Who would you take on?”

“I'm not sure yet,” Loki said, “but your father is showing me the work of some of the more promising students that have come to the palace to study. Perhaps I could show you some of the documents? They seem very talented, you see.”

Loki, I have something to ask you about. Those words would be so easy to say, Thor thought uneasily. Such easy words, how much they could change. “Have you discussed it with mother?” Thor asked.

“She thinks I'm ready to take on students,” Loki said proudly. “She thinks I have a good personality for teaching, too, and that's about the first time anyone besides you has complimented my personality, I think.”

Thor laughed, a heavy throaty sound as Loki sipped at his wine.

“Loki, I have something to ask you about,” Thor said once he finished laughing, the words falling from his mouth lacking all forethought.

“And what is that?”

“I'd like to try for children again.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the long break. And the lousy chapter.


	47. Our Scars

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, it's too little, too late, but this is the finale I always intended to write.

 “I... I would too,” Thor replied, his stomach feeling light with joy. They'd been cautious around each other, not sure enough to take the other to bed. He gazed upon Loki, and his heart swelled with pride—this beautiful creature wanted to be the mother of his children.

So Thor pulled him into bed, and loved him.

* * *

 

In the court of Jötunheimr, Thor kneeled on the cold floor, his heart racing. Loki stood off to the side, his hands resting absentmindedly on his stomach as he watched the proceedings. The swell of the child in his womb had not been noticeable to them at first, until pointed out, but now it was sure and obvious.

Býleistr stood in front of Thor, steadily holding the tools. Thor had agreed that he wanted the cuts Loki had—he wanted to look like his husband and portray their unity. It was their third anniversary.

Thor took a deep breath and let his mind wander as they gave the oaths of the proceedings, and the ceremonial words. As Býleistr stood over him, clutching the knives in his hands, Thor let his eyes flutter shut as he wiped his mind void of unnecessary thoughts.

Býleistr made the first cut, gently breaking skin. Thor felt the blood slowly begin to drip down his face. It hurt. The cuts were slow and steady, unlike the quick and rash knife wounds that Thor had endured before. He felt curves cut into his forehead, and pin point penetrations.

Soon, his skin felt thick with the blood. It dripped over his eyelids and onto his lips, it stained his clothes and congealed in his hair. The ceremony had not felt nearly so long when he had scarred Loki upon their wedding.

Loki, yes, he was doing this for Loki. Loki, who had been hesitant when Thor explained the idea, trying to express how much pain he would have to endure in a scarring ceremony. Loki, who had finally admitted in the end that Thor being scarred to match with him delighted him beyond all other measure.

Thor opened his eyes, and glanced at his husband, who was watching the ceremony intensely, his shrewd and intelligent eyes following every movement of the knives.

But then, finally, it was over. The cuts scabbed over, and healing lotion was applied. Thor's face was washed of blood with a wet rag, and he was wrapped back up into a thick and furry cloak.

They returned to their quarters in quiet and privacy, beginning to settle to bed. The whole week had centered around this ceremony—the scarring of a foreigner was a huge event to Loki's people, and there had been fasting, and rituals, and praying. Thor was frankly exhausted by it all.

Loki sat in bed, leaning against the headboard, watching Thor as he changed into clean nightclothes. Finally, Thor got onto the bed, and Loki lay his head against Thor's chest, drawing patterns on Thor's shirt with his fingertips.

“I'm so proud of you for enduring all that pain,” he whispered, glancing somewhere else in the room. His voice was distant, and that was an indication that his thoughts were too.

“Loki, I'm proud of you,” Thor said. “I did this because I love you, and we've both grown.”

“Mmm,” Loki whispered, lifting his head, and trailing his fingers along Thor's newly cut scarrings.

“Hey, aren't we finally officially married by your cultures norms now? Now that we're both scarred?” Thor asked, his hand settling to caress Loki's cheek.

“Yes,” Loki said, “yes, we are.”

_la fin_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nearly two years later, and I finally publish the last chapter. This is a very short chapter, but when I found myself, repeatedly, sitting down to write the epilogues I found myself tired. I always knew I wanted to end the fic with the scarring of Thor, and a confirmation of Loki's pregnancy, but here it finally is, however late it may be.
> 
> This fandom was good to me. I miss it.
> 
> It has been a privilege to write this story for you all. It has been the most epic in scope and length I have ever written, and has dealt with topics that were difficult and unique amongst my works. I think of this piece with pride, and I am proud to have written it.


End file.
